Rich husband always threatens divorce

[Anonymous]

I'm your age and I work. What's to prevent you returning to work? Rethink.

Depending upon where you live, you will be entitled to either and equitable portion of his retirement upon divorce. Access any records you can. Depending upon your HHI, a forensic accountant may be in order.

[Anonymous]

My husband threatened divorce for no good reason starting at 6 months into the marriage. I wanted to leave. My mom said I should keep trying. Stupid. At year 7, I made him promise never to do it again--or I would be done. He did at year 8 again. It has taken me 2 years to get a divorce that is now almost final--a whole decade later.

I wish I left at the very first threat. I work and have the entire time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, are you looking for advice or just to blow off steam?

Probably a little of both . But I did apply today at the local college and I’m meeting with guidance counselor.

I’m not following, are you planning to go back to school at 60 before getting a job?

[Anonymous]

Are you from this country? If not, sounds like he is the type to lure unsuspecting women into his orbit with money and then control them. Very messed up. You should divorce him. I know white men who have done that to Asian women. It’s narcissism and misogyny and racism.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm your age and I work. What's to prevent you returning to work? Rethink.

Depending upon where you live, you will be entitled to either and equitable portion of his retirement upon divorce. Access any records you can. Depending upon your HHI, a forensic accountant may be in order.

Probably because getting hired anywhere above entry level retail/customer service at 60 is a huge challenge with a great resume and recent experience. Getting hired at 60 after not working for a decade and possibly a poor resume otherwise doesn’t sound promising

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe how nice everyone is being to this. why do you feel entitled to his money anyway? You’ve been married 8 years, sounds like he had money before you met, He’s been supporting you and you’ve lived a good life. So now he’s a jerk, and you want half his stuff? What makes you so special? Grow up OP and start taking care of yourself. If he wants to give you gifts, fine. Get a job and start saving some cash.

I can't believe how no one has called the OP a troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe how nice everyone is being to this. why do you feel entitled to his money anyway? You’ve been married 8 years, sounds like he had money before you met, He’s been supporting you and you’ve lived a good life. So now he’s a jerk, and you want half his stuff? What makes you so special? Grow up OP and start taking care of yourself. If he wants to give you gifts, fine. Get a job and start saving some cash.

I can't believe how no one has called the OP a troll.

Why is she a troll? My DH only makes about $250k but he is the exact same as she describes (and probably a whole hell of a lot worse during conflict).

[Anonymous]

Is there a prenup?

[Anonymous]

Stop arguing in texts and e-mails. Then he has nothing to forward. Start selling some of the material things he bought you., that he won’t miss. I’d rather live in a one bedroom apartment and work a menial job than put up with that. Try to buy a gift card with groceries and see if he notices. If not, but one every week.

[Anonymous]

Tell him to stop with the idle threat and just do it! Be done and move on. You’ll be a lot happier. Money helps, but it isn’t everything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe how nice everyone is being to this. why do you feel entitled to his money anyway? You’ve been married 8 years, sounds like he had money before you met, He’s been supporting you and you’ve lived a good life. So now he’s a jerk, and you want half his stuff? What makes you so special? Grow up OP and start taking care of yourself. If he wants to give you gifts, fine. Get a job and start saving some cash.

Not the case at all. He’s worth millions and the house is a small part of his assets. The fact I found the house and now spending countless hrs decorating, not to mention him telling me we wld both wld be on the deed is what’s upsetting. I wldnt have any rights to it in event of divorce, (with prenup which I’m fine with), but the fact that if let’s say I’m in my 70s and he passes, I wld have to move out and it goes to his one grown child (who already gets everything he’s worth). It’s just really hard now to put so much time and effort into this home and live there now. I wish I cld live in the present and not think of the future so much . Must be a vajayjay thing. I’m going to a vocational school and I am going to get a decent paying job. And I’m not a foreigner.. And the email he forwarded was from my attorney to his as far as how I wanted the house set up in our names when he decided to put my name on the deed after I got upset bout it, but apparently it wasn’t to his liking ( too“demanding”). Originally he told me if he preceded me I cld live there till I die and half wld go back to his estate and half to my estate. Which I was happy with .. But when I received email from his attorney it changed to house wld be sold asap and I wld get half . I just hate liars! But the worse part is the fact that he shut down my credit cards the next day after this big fight and won’t let me get my own credit card. He turned it back on the next day but I feel so disrespected and vulnerable now. So yes I will now be really looking out for my future and doing everything I can to build a nest egg, and keep my mouth shut with all the advice I’ve gotten here. That way the next time he threatens me with divorce, I can say, you got it !!

[Anonymous]

Why can't people see this coming when they buy into these type of marriages.

If you are not a child, then another adult should not be supporting you (not including here a stay at home parent with young children, who in effect has a job).

If you accept the role of dependent, then don't be surprised when your husband feels he can oversee you.

Get out. It is unhealthy and disrespectful to you. Don't even consider selling your freedom and self esteem for things he can buy you.

[Anonymous]

Start selling things. If he's been showering you with gifts for all these years, I imagine you have lots of bags, shoes, clothes, jewelry that is worth quite bit of money and you could sell them easily. Then you open up new account and put that money in there.

I don't know why you'd waste the time going back to college in order to get a job. You're 60, you dont have the luxury of starting a new degree and hoping to get an entry level job in the field after

[Anonymous]

I don't buy this for one second.

First, this is like reading a stereotype of a gold digger situation

Second, Op thinks that going back to college at 60, getting a new degree, and THEN finding a job is a smart option

Not buying this at all

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe how nice everyone is being to this. why do you feel entitled to his money anyway? You’ve been married 8 years, sounds like he had money before you met, He’s been supporting you and you’ve lived a good life. So now he’s a jerk, and you want half his stuff? What makes you so special? Grow up OP and start taking care of yourself. If he wants to give you gifts, fine. Get a job and start saving some cash.

Not the case at all. He’s worth millions and the house is a small part of his assets. The fact I found the house and now spending countless hrs decorating, not to mention him telling me we wld both wld be on the deed is what’s upsetting. I wldnt have any rights to it in event of divorce, (with prenup which I’m fine with), but the fact that if let’s say I’m in my 70s and he passes, I wld have to move out and it goes to his one grown child (who already gets everything he’s worth). It’s just really hard now to put so much time and effort into this home and live there now. I wish I cld live in the present and not think of the future so much . Must be a vajayjay thing. I’m going to a vocational school and I am going to get a decent paying job. And I’m not a foreigner.. And the email he forwarded was from my attorney to his as far as how I wanted the house set up in our names when he decided to put my name on the deed after I got upset bout it, but apparently it wasn’t to his liking ( too“demanding”). Originally he told me if he preceded me I cld live there till I die and half wld go back to his estate and half to my estate. Which I was happy with .. But when I received email from his attorney it changed to house wld be sold asap and I wld get half . I just hate liars! But the worse part is the fact that he shut down my credit cards the next day after this big fight and won’t let me get my own credit card. He turned it back on the next day but I feel so disrespected and vulnerable now. So yes I will now be really looking out for my future and doing everything I can to build a nest egg, and keep my mouth shut with all the advice I’ve gotten here. That way the next time he threatens me with divorce, I can say, you got it !!

Ok this is def. a troll. A "vajajay thing"? You think you're going to easily get a job in a field that you've never worked in when you're in your 60s? Try again troll. This would have been more believable if you had said you were in your 40s.