Boyfriend Wants To Stop..

Anonymous
If you haven't already done so, I'd also have a conversation with your OBGYN about waiting 3-5 years to start trying for a baby if you're already in your 30s. Just so you have an accurate view of fertility statistics.
Anonymous
Does he not want to have children yet? Then he has to keep using a condom. Each person is responsible for their own contraception. Two forms of contraception are necessary if you really want to have good protection.

Men have to use birth control all the time until they are ready to have and support both financially and in terms of time a future child.

Do you not want to have children yet? Then keep the IUD in until you do, and make him use a form of birth control that he chooses (for men it's basically only condoms, maybe spermicide instead, but that's not really entirely "his" responsibility since it has to be inside you.)
Anonymous
Why get the IUD if you're not going to trust it? There is a slim chance you'll get pregnant. There's also a slim chance you'll get hit by a bus walking across the street, but you probably are not going to hole up at home all the time because of that slim chance.

Sex without condoms feels better, and it sounds like there is no STD worry, so lose the condoms if you believe in the IUD.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.


Yeah. I don’t like it either. Especially your comment about not wanting him to be unhappy about your sex life. That’s jerky of him if he is uniting that. You seem to want to keep using condoms for now and that’s fine.


+1. Six months isn't all that long, either. You don't really know each other yet.


+1

This is a good data point about his character.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:He's definitely not sponge-worthy.


hello elaine!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)


what we did was pull out and a clean finish with oral. It seemed to be just as good or better!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.


It means he doesn’t enjoy using condoms. In other words, he’s normal.


Condoms are terrible, I would rather skip it and go to oral.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Here's a story I remember from the news, baby born holding the IUD like a rattle:
https://www.google.com/search?q=baby+born+with+iud+in+hand&tbm=isch&source=iu&ictx=1&fir=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M%253A%252CAqFfAnZmptWMEM%252C_&vet=1&usg=AI4_-kQ89jEut4-3EckXMA4cXsDOaR6JCQ&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiPscnI-8HmAhUET98KHZdaCDwQ9QEwAnoECAcQIA#imgrc=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M:


He wasn't born with it in his hand, there's a sack that the baby floats in, which an IUD would never be able to enter. Knuckleheads here.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Here's a story I remember from the news, baby born holding the IUD like a rattle:
https://www.google.com/search?q=baby+born+with+iud+in+hand&tbm=isch&source=iu&ictx=1&fir=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M%253A%252CAqFfAnZmptWMEM%252C_&vet=1&usg=AI4_-kQ89jEut4-3EckXMA4cXsDOaR6JCQ&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiPscnI-8HmAhUET98KHZdaCDwQ9QEwAnoECAcQIA#imgrc=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M:
it was placed in the baby’s hand after it was born via c-section.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)


I agree with this.

/also a woman


Also agree. The 2 times I stopped using condoms + my IUD was after I saw and showed a clear STD screen. One was a 4 year relationship after about a year. The other was now-DH, very early in the relationship, but we’d had condoms break several times so wanted to give up on them.


Alrighty then, the three of you must have missed school that day, but an erection carries a very small amount of semen to the tip of a penis. Eggs can be exposed to swimmers through mere penetration of the vaginal canal. Male orgasm is ergo not a prerequisite to pregnancy and "pulling out" is really bad advice.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)


I agree with this.

/also a woman


Also agree. The 2 times I stopped using condoms + my IUD was after I saw and showed a clear STD screen. One was a 4 year relationship after about a year. The other was now-DH, very early in the relationship, but we’d had condoms break several times so wanted to give up on them.


Alrighty then, the three of you must have missed school that day, but an erection carries a very small amount of semen to the tip of a penis. Eggs can be exposed to swimmers through mere penetration of the vaginal canal. Male orgasm is ergo not a prerequisite to pregnancy and "pulling out" is really bad advice.


Every one of these PP's, and the OP, also had an IUD, but thanks for demonstrating the internet truism that the first person to call someone uneducated in a thread will do it while saying something incredibly ignorant.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.


Huh? By that logic he should wear them even after they get married.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)


what we did was pull out and a clean finish with oral. It seemed to be just as good or better!


If the concern is STDs then letting him blast in your mouth isn't a great idea either.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.


Huh? By that logic he should wear them even after they get married.


I don't see a problem with that. Less mess too.
Anonymous
This is obviously personal but it sounds like OP thinks her need to satisfy her man outweighs the worry of accidental pregnancy.
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