Boyfriend Wants To Stop..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)

OP here. We are both STD free. I’m just worried about getting pregnant, ah IUD or both control isn’t 100% effective. I don’t want to get pregnant, but I don’t want my boyfriend ( and possible future husband) to be dissatisfied with our sex life.

Nothing is 100% but abstinence. Not even condoms + IUD.

You have to be the luckiest person in the world. Play the lottery in that case.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)

OP here. We are both STD free. I’m just worried about getting pregnant, ah IUD or both control isn’t 100% effective. I don’t want to get pregnant, but I don’t want my boyfriend ( and possible future husband) to be dissatisfied with our sex life.

First of all, you don’t know whether or not he is std free because there is no commercially available test for HPV in men.

I personally always used condoms until getting engaged. I recommend you tell him you will consider stopping condoms once you are married or engaged.

[Anonymous]

The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

Yeah. I don’t like it either. Especially your comment about not wanting him to be unhappy about your sex life. That’s jerky of him if he is uniting that. You seem to want to keep using condoms for now and that’s fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

Yeah. I don’t like it either. Especially your comment about not wanting him to be unhappy about your sex life. That’s jerky of him if he is uniting that. You seem to want to keep using condoms for now and that’s fine.

+1. Six months isn't all that long, either. You don't really know each other yet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

It means he doesn’t enjoy using condoms. In other words, he’s normal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

It means he doesn’t enjoy using condoms. In other words, he’s normal.

6:52 pp here. Ok. But I don't enjoy morning sickness, weight gain, birth, and recovery. As a woman, I'm normal too. Who faces the bigger consequences here? hint-it's not him.

[Anonymous]

You have an IUD. Talk to your OB. You should be pretty well covered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

Yeah. I don’t like it either. Especially your comment about not wanting him to be unhappy about your sex life. That’s jerky of him if he is uniting that. You seem to want to keep using condoms for now and that’s fine.

+1. Six months isn't all that long, either. You don't really know each other yet.

six months is plenty of time if they see each other often- especially if they are in their 30’s.

[Anonymous]

Here's a story I remember from the news, baby born holding the IUD like a rattle:
https://www.google.com/search?q=baby+born+with+iud+in+hand&tbm=isch&source=iu&ictx=1&fir=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M%253A%252CAqFfAnZmptWMEM%252C_&vet=1&usg=AI4_-kQ89jEut4-3EckXMA4cXsDOaR6JCQ&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiPscnI-8HmAhUET98KHZdaCDwQ9QEwAnoECAcQIA#imgrc=yhY2MWoNuMYv7M:

[Anonymous]

You should only do what feels comfortable to you. That said, I feel like this is a low risk situation and 6 mo is long enough to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have an IUD then the only concern is STDs. Both of you should get tested and then lose the condoms.

If you like 2 methods to feel safer, he can pull out.

(I'm a woman, BTW.)

I agree with this.

/also a woman

Also agree. The 2 times I stopped using condoms + my IUD was after I saw and showed a clear STD screen. One was a 4 year relationship after about a year. The other was now-DH, very early in the relationship, but we’d had condoms break several times so wanted to give up on them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

Most people stop using a barrier method when they become exclusive. If he was refusing to get tested you might have a point. But one of the main benefits of monogamy is losing the condoms.

-woman

[Anonymous]

IUD is an extremely reliable form of birth control, as you know. The only person I know who "got pregnant with an IUD" actually didn't have the IUD but didn't realize it - it had fallen out entirely and they were not using any protection at all. I've personally had 2 IUDs and no issues with either of them.

If you are comfortable with the clean STD test and the relationship is stable and headed somewhere, I see no reason to continue to use condoms. If you get pregnant on an IUD, you will be making some decisions together, but realistically, the chances of that are extremely low.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: The fact that he is pushing to stop condoms-tells me something about HIM. He's not taking your well being into consideration, OP.

It means he doesn’t enjoy using condoms. In other words, he’s normal.

6:52 pp here. Ok. But I don't enjoy morning sickness, weight gain, birth, and recovery. As a woman, I'm normal too. Who faces the bigger consequences here? hint-it's not him.

Yes, but the IUD is a very reliable protection against the things that you don't like. I'm a woman with an IUD and I don't like morning sickness OR condoms, which is why I have the IUD.