S/O siblings at bday party - what if the invitation did not say anything about that?

[Anonymous]

When you bring a sibling, I hope that sibling brings a gift for the birthday child.

[Anonymous]

Life lesson that too many people have not learned. When an invitation is given, it is for the people on the in invitation. It is not up the the recipient to add or seek to add any more people. Kids party, adult party, whatever.

[Anonymous]

I think in preschool its more acceptable but as thebkids get bigger the party spaces become expensive so you cant accomodate. My kids bday party this year was over $40/kid including food. No way, I could afford to include siblings. Of course a baby or toddler who wont really participate could come but I had to say no to school age kids.

[Anonymous]

Please don’t bring them. If they are an infant fine but not older than 1.

I’m struggling now because everyone RSVPed for siblings and we are overcapacity. the space is making us un-invite people, it’s not a good look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that no, it is not okay. But these questions always remind me of when my kids were in preschool. Most invitations were silent regarding siblings so naturally, I brought my one invited child. I would get to the party and it would be swarming with siblings and sometimes TWO parents per family and the entire party I'd have people asking me, "Where is [uninvited sibling]?" and I'd just say, "Home with [DH]." But so wanted to say, "I left him home because the invitation DID NOT SAY SIBLINGS WELCOME!!!"

I have a 3 and a 1 year old and everyone wants to know where my DH and 1 year old are. It's for sure a problem.

Yup this! If it's at a playground, I do sometimes bring the other one (and my DH) and a bribe to keep that kid away from the cake/goodie bag. My oldest seems to have made friends with lots of only children, so I don't think those parents think about it much.

But I'd never bring the sibling to a venue party without an explicit instruction because I realize those are pay-per-head things.

[Anonymous]

Is it a drop off party? Don’t ask
Is it a little kids party? Is the activity appropriate for your other child - meaning a big kid won’t monopolize the bounce house or a little kid won’t disrupt the puppet show.
If so - call and ask. If it is at a venue where you pay per head, call and ask but offer to pay for your extra kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think in preschool its more acceptable but as thebkids get bigger the party spaces become expensive so you cant accomodate. My kids bday party this year was over $40/kid including food. No way, I could afford to include siblings. Of course a baby or toddler who wont really participate could come but I had to say no to school age kids.

How did they RSVP for siblings if they weren’t invited?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it depends a little. I've asked when the venue was a public park and the invitation was just sent to my email w/ no specific name and the counter thingy allowed an RSVP for an unlimited number of folks. In every single case, it's come back "please bring siblings!" Occasionally followed by the person paperless post-ing the whole invite list to make it clear that siblings are welcomed. I think the preschool crowd on their first kid often just hasn't thought the issue through yet. I would obviously never ask at a pay per kid venue (except when I once confirmed it would be OK to bring my 2 month old, just to make sure the venue didn't have any crazy policy).

I’ve also asked about bringing a sibling to park or other open venues and the answer has always been an enthusiastic yes. If it’s at a house or other private facility, I assume it’s just for the one kid and plan accordingly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think in preschool its more acceptable but as thebkids get bigger the party spaces become expensive so you cant accomodate. My kids bday party this year was over $40/kid including food. No way, I could afford to include siblings. Of course a baby or toddler who wont really participate could come but I had to say no to school age kids.

How did they RSVP for siblings if they weren’t invited?

Please tell me what invite service you use because Evite, Paperless post and Punchbowl all allow parents to enter the number of kids coming. Then it’s on you to call the parents that put in 2 and tell them no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think in preschool its more acceptable but as thebkids get bigger the party spaces become expensive so you cant accomodate. My kids bday party this year was over $40/kid including food. No way, I could afford to include siblings. Of course a baby or toddler who wont really participate could come but I had to say no to school age kids.

How did they RSVP for siblings if they weren’t invited?

Please tell me what invite service you use because Evite, Paperless post and Punchbowl all allow parents to enter the number of kids coming. Then it’s on you to call the parents that put in 2 and tell them no.

You can limit this (in Evite anyway) - my close friends all know I don't mean this for their families if they have more than one child.

[Anonymous]

What about when it's an evite sent to a parent's email?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What about when it's an evite sent to a parent's email?

You can edit the name of the person who is invited. We know a family with several kids but depending on who’s party we put the name of the child on the to field.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have totally brought my baby to older kid party. Baby stayed in sling or slept in car seat. No attempt to interact with birthday child or be a part of the venue. Also no food because baby is 4 months old. Is this ok? Are people referring to older / interactive siblings or anyone?

Immobile infants in slings are generally exempt from headcounts. Crawling babies and toddlers need their own invitations. Basically anyone who is capable of eating or moving needs to be invited, not tag along without permission. (That doesn’t mean feed your kindergartener before you come so he won’t be hungry for the pizza served. That means babies still breastfeeding or taking bottles.)

I would still ask if it's ok. Never ever assume.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the invitation did not say yes or not to sibling, is it okay to ask the party organizer if it is okay to bring a sibling?

Bring siblings ONLY is invitations state "SIBLINGS WELCOME"! Otherwise, it is never okay to dump your other children on mother of birthday child! What is so damn hard to understand about this!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

It's kind of like a wedding, OP. You just don't bring anyone not listed on the invitation.