Pet peeve- your kid is not “too smart” he is just poorly behaved

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a few moms who swear their obviously poorly behaved kids are gifted. One started reading chapter books at a very young age...but s/he also annoys the teacher by disrupting the class, not following directions, crawling under desks, etc. The moms always say the misbehavior stems from being bored because they are so smart. Um, no...your kid is just a punk.

My kid is the punk. He interrupts and gets in trouble, and yes has been tested as gifted. Trust me when I say I am not bragging about it. I’m mortified, and no amount of consequences have drastically changed his behavior. I would rather my kid be well-behaved and hard-working than smart and obnoxious. We are considered “strict” parents according to our neighbors, so I don’t think I’m annoying like the mom at the pool referenced above. Anyway, just wanted to say this because my head isn’t in the sand. And I’m sorry about the punks out there like my son who are disrupting your kid’s education, I truly am.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a few moms who swear their obviously poorly behaved kids are gifted. One started reading chapter books at a very young age...but s/he also annoys the teacher by disrupting the class, not following directions, crawling under desks, etc. The moms always say the misbehavior stems from being bored because they are so smart. Um, no...your kid is just a punk.

My kid is the punk. He interrupts and gets in trouble, and yes has been tested as gifted. Trust me when I say I am not bragging about it. I’m mortified, and no amount of consequences have drastically changed his behavior. I would rather my kid be well-behaved and hard-working than smart and obnoxious. We are considered “strict” parents according to our neighbors, so I don’t think I’m annoying like the mom at the pool referenced above. Anyway, just wanted to say this because my head isn’t in the sand. And I’m sorry about the punks out there like my son who are disrupting your kid’s education, I truly am.

My me is gifted and well behaved. Gifted kids who act out don't do so because they are gifted; they have behavior issues. If your kid needs to be entertained 24/7, then that's an issue. And that issue has nothing to do with being gifted. But it might be related to overly strict parenting. Kids can't behave perfectly 24/7; the ideal scenario is having kids behave in public and at school while blowing off steam at home. If you're crazy strict when your kid is with you, then he's going to blow off steam and act out at school. And when your kid crawls under desks or fights with the teacher, that interferes with my kid's instruction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a few moms who swear their obviously poorly behaved kids are gifted. One started reading chapter books at a very young age...but s/he also annoys the teacher by disrupting the class, not following directions, crawling under desks, etc. The moms always say the misbehavior stems from being bored because they are so smart. Um, no...your kid is just a punk.

My kid is the punk. He interrupts and gets in trouble, and yes has been tested as gifted. Trust me when I say I am not bragging about it. I’m mortified, and no amount of consequences have drastically changed his behavior. I would rather my kid be well-behaved and hard-working than smart and obnoxious. We are considered “strict” parents according to our neighbors, so I don’t think I’m annoying like the mom at the pool referenced above. Anyway, just wanted to say this because my head isn’t in the sand. And I’m sorry about the punks out there like my son who are disrupting your kid’s education, I truly am.

My me is gifted and well behaved. Gifted kids who act out don't do so because they are gifted; they have behavior issues. If your kid needs to be entertained 24/7, then that's an issue. And that issue has nothing to do with being gifted. But it might be related to overly strict parenting. Kids can't behave perfectly 24/7; the ideal scenario is having kids behave in public and at school while blowing off steam at home. If you're crazy strict when your kid is with you, then he's going to blow off steam and act out at school. And when your kid crawls under desks or fights with the teacher, that interferes with my kid's instruction.

Your kid clearly is not as gifted as PPs child, so you don’t understand. Don’t be jealous, not everyone can be a genius.

[Anonymous]

My friend does this with her 4 year old. "Oh she's just too smart. That's why she's so defiant."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend does this with her 4 year old. "Oh she's just too smart. That's why she's so defiant."

I would smile and wink saying: “She sure is! She has mommy all figured out doesn’t she?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid had a friend who was terribly behaved when mom was around. She'd always say, in front of her kid and mine, that his behavior was understandable because he was gifted. Sometimes, if we both asked our kids to do something, like get out of the pool for adult swim on a pool playdate, and mine did and hers didn't, she'd say something like "I guess there are some advantages to not being so smart". Now, I fully admit that my kid is not gifted, but I don't think the fact that he follows directions is evidence of such.

"True, I guess it buys one an extra few minutes in the pool."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a few moms who swear their obviously poorly behaved kids are gifted. One started reading chapter books at a very young age...but s/he also annoys the teacher by disrupting the class, not following directions, crawling under desks, etc. The moms always say the misbehavior stems from being bored because they are so smart. Um, no...your kid is just a punk.

My kid is the punk. He interrupts and gets in trouble, and yes has been tested as gifted. Trust me when I say I am not bragging about it. I’m mortified, and no amount of consequences have drastically changed his behavior. I would rather my kid be well-behaved and hard-working than smart and obnoxious. We are considered “strict” parents according to our neighbors, so I don’t think I’m annoying like the mom at the pool referenced above. Anyway, just wanted to say this because my head isn’t in the sand. And I’m sorry about the punks out there like my son who are disrupting your kid’s education, I truly am.

My me is gifted and well behaved. Gifted kids who act out don't do so because they are gifted; they have behavior issues. If your kid needs to be entertained 24/7, then that's an issue. And that issue has nothing to do with being gifted. But it might be related to overly strict parenting. Kids can't behave perfectly 24/7; the ideal scenario is having kids behave in public and at school while blowing off steam at home. If you're crazy strict when your kid is with you, then he's going to blow off steam and act out at school. And when your kid crawls under desks or fights with the teacher, that interferes with my kid's instruction.

Yes, I KNOW that his acting out interrupts your kid. I thought my sincere apology at the end of the post was indicative that I feel bad about it. I did say he’s a punk and I said he’s gifted, but I didn’t say all gifted kids are punks or that’s why my kid is a punk. I have another kid who is also gifted and that kid is very well-behaved. I think we are strict, but not overly strict. In my situation I feel like I’m damned if I do and I’m damned if I don’t. If I only had my older kid who is gifted and well-behaved, I would probably be patting myself on the back for my parenting skills, but in reality it is both nature and nurture that contributes to personality and behavior. We are working on it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a few moms who swear their obviously poorly behaved kids are gifted. One started reading chapter books at a very young age...but s/he also annoys the teacher by disrupting the class, not following directions, crawling under desks, etc. The moms always say the misbehavior stems from being bored because they are so smart. Um, no...your kid is just a punk.

My kid is the punk. He interrupts and gets in trouble, and yes has been tested as gifted. Trust me when I say I am not bragging about it. I’m mortified, and no amount of consequences have drastically changed his behavior. I would rather my kid be well-behaved and hard-working than smart and obnoxious. We are considered “strict” parents according to our neighbors, so I don’t think I’m annoying like the mom at the pool referenced above. Anyway, just wanted to say this because my head isn’t in the sand. And I’m sorry about the punks out there like my son who are disrupting your kid’s education, I truly am.

My me is gifted and well behaved. Gifted kids who act out don't do so because they are gifted; they have behavior issues. If your kid needs to be entertained 24/7, then that's an issue. And that issue has nothing to do with being gifted. But it might be related to overly strict parenting. Kids can't behave perfectly 24/7; the ideal scenario is having kids behave in public and at school while blowing off steam at home. If you're crazy strict when your kid is with you, then he's going to blow off steam and act out at school. And when your kid crawls under desks or fights with the teacher, that interferes with my kid's instruction.

Your kid clearly is not as gifted as PPs child, so you don’t understand. Don’t be jealous, not everyone can be a genius.

Not being snarky: but I wonder if the misbehaved gifted kid is a bit spectrumy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You guys are so insecure. Relax. I never worried about any of this when my kids were that age. Wrestle them in the harness, end of story.

exactly. What happened to society. He’s 3. Buckle him up, if he cries, he cries, but it will get better every day that goes by, when you don’t allow them to negotiate every little thing. They’ll get it. A master negotiator. Um, ok

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow. You guys are so insecure. Relax. I never worried about any of this when my kids were that age. Wrestle them in the harness, end of story.

exactly. What happened to society. He’s 3. Buckle him up, if he cries, he cries, but it will get better every day that goes by, when you don’t allow them to negotiate every little thing. They’ll get it. A master negotiator. Um, ok

Most people agree with you. The OP was saying that parents who make all these excuses are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

My friend just told me she wished her three year old son was a dummy so he wouldn’t misbehave so much.....he is just too smart for his own good. I just can’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend just told me she wished her three year old son was a dummy so he wouldn’t misbehave so much.....he is just too smart for his own good. I just can’t.

Lol. Always the "too smart for their own good". No, your 3 year old is not too smart for his own good (although he may be quite smart- who knows? Irrelevant). He is just misbehaving.

[Anonymous]

Who are you guys hanging out with??? None of my friends have ever described their 3 year old as too smart. Most of them are like - yeah my kid is an asshole. Those are my people. Cut out these toxic people from your life - it's too short!

[Anonymous]

Think OP is just a jealous loser. Growing up I was always the problem kid in class with not listening and whatever. Sorry, but most school subjects are about as boring as it gets. Well I got a perfect SAT score and all my teachers but my math teacher were amazed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Think OP is just a jealous loser. Growing up I was always the problem kid in class with not listening and whatever. Sorry, but most school subjects are about as boring as it gets. Well I got a perfect SAT score and all my teachers but my math teacher were amazed.

And see this is what I mean. You’re calling someone a “jealous loser”- not because you’re smart, but because you’re a dick. The two are unrelated.