Former friend is dating (not yet ex) husband

[Anonymous]

This is such a selfish thing for both your ex friend and divorcing spouse to do. It’s a double dose of betrayal.

[Anonymous]

You say former? Was there a falling out? If so, then you have no dog in this. Current friend- no, not ok.

[Anonymous]

A former friend daring your STBXH, assuming you are legally separated, is klassy in the same way frame stamps are but not illegal of course.

[Anonymous]

My Mom married my Dads friend/coworker. I love my stepDad. My Dad passed away years ago but he and my Mom became friends and my Mom was heartbroken when my father died. Life is strange.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:crappy thing to do

+1

She can't find her own man. Who would want her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You say former? Was there a falling out? If so, then you have no dog in this. Current friend- no, not ok.

HAHHAHAHAHAHA....she's supposed to stick around? Hilarious!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A former friend daring your STBXH, assuming you are legally separated, is klassy in the same way frame stamps are but not illegal of course.

It is technically adultery

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A former friend daring your STBXH, assuming you are legally separated, is klassy in the same way frame stamps are but not illegal of course.

It is technically adultery

That depends on whether there’s already a separation agreement in place where they agreed that both were free to date other people and that doing so would not be deemed adultery.

[Anonymous]

Is it likely they were "dating" while you were married too?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People are weird. I would find it not OK and disrespectful. Dump the friend, OP.

+1. F her! Couldn't she find anyone else?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My Mom married my Dads friend/coworker. I love my stepDad. My Dad passed away years ago but he and my Mom became friends and my Mom was heartbroken when my father died. Life is strange.

This is so interesting to hear. I've seen this happen so many times (friend and spouse falling in love). It is so painful for the betrayed person, but makes some sense, once you have kids those are the people you end up spending time with. I've even seen glimmers of it in my marriage (a friend of mine became attracted to my husband, I became attracted to my kids friend's dad) no affairs or divorces for us, but grappling with those feelings can be a little confusing. I actually am still friends with that woman, I shut down contact for a year or so and had many discussions with my husband about it and came to feel that Attractions happen, and life is strange. I have to think that if the original couple from this post is willing to blow up two families, they thought what they had together was worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My Mom married my Dads friend/coworker. I love my stepDad. My Dad passed away years ago but he and my Mom became friends and my Mom was heartbroken when my father died. Life is strange.

Jack? Rebecca?? MIGUEL???

[Anonymous]

I dated my ex wife's friend for about six months. My ex went batshit crazy and started sleeping around. Her behavior got so bizarre that she lost a few of her closest friends and almost lost her job. She checked out of being a mom. Her friend came around to check on us since I became a single dad overnight.

There was something about her that made me comfortable enough to be open and admit that I was not okay. She started helping out around the house. We started talking a lot. Before you knew it, we both had grown attached. We ended up dating for almost a year. We're still good friends now. My ex still hates her more than anything in the world.

[Anonymous]

Widowed people often marry old friends who were friends of the couple. I see little difference here, except that the divorce isn't yet final. It's probably better for the kids than introducing them to strangers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I dated my ex wife's friend for about six months. My ex went batshit crazy and started sleeping around. Her behavior got so bizarre that she lost a few of her closest friends and almost lost her job. She checked out of being a mom. Her friend came around to check on us since I became a single dad overnight.

There was something about her that made me comfortable enough to be open and admit that I was not okay. She started helping out around the house. We started talking a lot. Before you knew it, we both had grown attached. We ended up dating for almost a year. We're still good friends now. My ex still hates her more than anything in the world.

This seems to bear little resemblance to OP’s situation given that OP didn’t come in with batshit ranting but rather with a calm request for a perspective check, and hadn’t followed up with any trashing of ex or friend that I can recall.