| You don’t shit where you eat, and you really don’t shit where your kids eat. |
| Ew. |
| You are moving on. Why do you care? Worry about you, not about him. |
| It’s kinda trashy but why expend so much energy on it? |
| Nope, not ok. Sorry OP. |
| Need more info about former friend |
Is he so desperate and incapable that he can’t find someone who won’t cause school yard gossip? Why do we always blame the woman? |
You do know you don't get a vote, right? |
| It is not waste of your time. It just adds more to the drama and you are better off. Concentrate on yourself and the kids. This is a bad situation but you will get through it and the kids will know what an awesome parent you are. Kids can see what is happening. Be the better parent. |
OP says kids are involved in both sides. That's reason for concern as the situation could be very upsetting and confusing for kids; however there's not a lot OP can do except decide how she will act in front of her own kids and how she'll answer any questions they ask. OP--are your kids and the woman's kids friends? Friends outside school? Maybe just classmates or in the same school but different grades--? The existing relationship if any between the two sets of kids does matter here, I think. If your kids and hers are goo friends now, this change could affect the kids on levels beyond just "dad and mom are divorcing."....In your shoes I honestly would see a therapist or counselor ASAP and ask for help both processing your divorce yourself and help deciding how to talk to your kids when you're emotional and angry. I'd need a script to help me stay calm when having to talk to him and a plan for how to react if I ran into her. I'm sorry about this. Same thing happened to two families I knew. The dad ended up marrying the family friend pretty soon after the divorce was final. If that happens in your case, all the more reason to get outside help and ideas on how to present as the calmest person you can be for your kids. |
I think it's trashy by him too, but OP doesn't have any claim to loyalty from her ex. She does have claim to loyalty from a friend, so the friend's behavior is worse (I'm assuming this is a former friend only now that she's dating the ex, if they fell out years ago, then the former friendship is irrelevant here). |
You're very controlling, aren't you, OP? Probably that's a large part of why you're being dumped for your ex-friend. Reality check sweetie. |
| crappy thing to do |
|
Er... no. Just no. And I haven't been an angel all my life, but I wouldn't do that. |
| As long as he had made it clear that you will not reconcile there are no issues with him dating. Good on him! |