Im always late and I hate myself for it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Stupid DCUM quote thing. This was meant to be its own response....

I don't really hate that you're late, I hate that you don't call or text me to tell me you're late. I could run an errand or leave my house later. I hate when I rush to get somewhere on time and you are late. Just be honest with me and let me know you'll be late.

+ 1. I’m generally flexible when I can be.

[Anonymous]

My brother was always late. My assessment was that he would figure out how long it took to get somewhere and then he would plan on the fastest possible scenario. I always plan on a scenario that includes unforeseen delays. If I'm early I just do stuff on my phone until it's time. Whereas he got tickets for driving so fast (recklessly) to get somewhere that he hadn't allowed enough time for.

Moral of the story: Plan to be early, not on time. Then you will never be late.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

Really? Name one thing that would make a childless person chronically late?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How on earth does it take 30 min to get out the door? You grab the diaper bag (or better yet leave stuff in the car as PP suggested) and you walk out the door and buckle everyone in. Then you drive away. That doesn’t take 30 minutes. Everyone gets dressed when they get up. No lounging around all day in pjs. If you’re out of bed, get dressed. Shoes are by the door. Stroller stays in the car. Seriously, how is it taking that long?

This is a very good observation. I have a bad habit of not getting dressed until close to when we leave. If I would get up and get dressed, afternoon events would go smoother. It’s just a bad habit I must break.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just had my third this summer and she took us over the edge as far as our timely mannerisms go. We are almost always 10-12 minutes late to everything no matter how hard I try. I literally start prepping for the car 30 minutes before we have to leave the driveway an we are still usually late. Im very organized and not usually an ADHD-type personality. Its bothering me to my core but can't seem to change it. Anyone else have this issue?

OP, since you asked - I don't think you feel bad at all about being late. I think you enjoy telling everyone how "busy" you are. Maybe look a little deeper and see why that is important to you.

[Anonymous]

We basically double the time it takes to travel anywhere here on a "good" day. So it if takes an hour, we leave two hours of driving time. It's the only way we can make it "on time" with the variable traffic. The downside is that sometimes we are 30 minutes early and have to kill time before arriving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

Really? Name one thing that would make a childless person chronically late?

A painful chronic health condition.
Overscheduling
Anxiety and panic disorder
Underestimating how long traffic will take

I have / do all of the above.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op, it’s not as bad as the others are making it out to be. People in dc are so type a, uptight. I’d rather a friend or colleague who’s habitually late than one that’s boring, not a team player, or generally a jerk. You have three kids! That’s awesome, and dcum is jealous. Signed, working mom of 2, sometimes late

I don’t think it’s a DC thing. I’m from the Midwest. I’m always in time. It’s how I was raised. At the root of being late is rudeness. You are telling other people that your time is more important than theirs.

And how you pivoted to people being jealous of her 3 kids is just very odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

Really? Name one thing that would make a childless person chronically late?

A painful chronic health condition.
Overscheduling
Anxiety and panic disorder
Underestimating how long traffic will take

I have / do all of the above.

Right. And you know you have/do all of the above. So build in appropriate time (or more!) to allow for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, it’s not as bad as the others are making it out to be. People in dc are so type a, uptight. I’d rather a friend or colleague who’s habitually late than one that’s boring, not a team player, or generally a jerk. You have three kids! That’s awesome, and dcum is jealous. Signed, working mom of 2, sometimes late

I don’t think it’s a DC thing. I’m from the Midwest. I’m always in time. It’s how I was raised. At the root of being late is rudeness. You are telling other people that your time is more important than theirs.

And how you pivoted to people being jealous of her 3 kids is just very odd.

+1

Bingo. See example of mom upthread who expected other mom to pick up her kids, almost every day, in addition to her own. WTF? That mom is not your unpaid nanny. Come to think of it, even if that mom had a nanny, that nanny is not your nanny. Deal with your own crap in your own house - stay in your lane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

Really? Name one thing that would make a childless person chronically late?

A painful chronic health condition. Understandable.
Overscheduling Not my problem. Don’t overschedule. Why are the plans before me more important?
Anxiety and panic disorder There are meds and CBT for that.
Underestimating how long traffic will take Allow extra time. It’s OK to be a little early. Bring a book.

I have / do all of the above.

Right. And you know you have/do all of the above. So build in appropriate time (or more!) to allow for it.

[Anonymous]

Having three kids can make even the most punctual individual tardy on a regular basis.

I would cut myself some slack now.

A lot of stuff is truly out of your hands.

And in your children’s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Single, no kids so there was no excuse other than being pathological, rude and never acknowledging he has issues.

Just get started 15 minutes earlier. At least you want to stop being late

Yes, because only people with kids have anything that could make them late. I agree that it's not okay that he was late, but statements like this are why childless people feel annoyed by parents.

+10000!!!

Really? Name one thing that would make a childless person chronically late?

Same thing that makes parents chronically late -- failure to plan.

[Anonymous]

I had some additional executive function and memory issues in the 9-12 months after giving birth. It’s a hormonal thing. I was a surrogate, so I’m certain it wasn’t a baby care issue.