How to stop fantasizing about coworker?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

That would open up a can of trust issues and you didn’t even chea!

[Anonymous]

OP - if your fantasies are going into deep X-rated territory then just bring all that frustrated energy into the bedroom with your husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm married (happily) but I have a new coworker who I am majorly attracted to. When he is close to me it's like electricity running through my body. I would never ever cheat, but am having fantasies that are quite distracting. I've been attracted to other men besides DH and it's faded over time, but the attraction has never been as strong as it is with this new coworker. Anyone else dealt with attraction like this? Any tips on how to stop fantasizing about him/ help the attraction pass so I can be less distracted? To reiterate - I love DH very much (married 7 years, no kids but trying), I still find him attractive, and I would never cheat.

Better watch your step. You could be sexually harassing him.

[Anonymous]

Go on a “business trip “ with him one weekend. Get it out of your system.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - if your fantasies are going into deep X-rated territory then just bring all that frustrated energy into the bedroom with your husband.

Do what this poster said - of course you are going to find yourself attracted to other people once in a while. Take that energy to your own husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You may be sitting too close to wall socket.

[grace4ever]

Thank you for sharing your concerns with us. I’m truly sorry that you are dealing with such difficult situation. These forums are great for sharing burdens, and venting. Regards to your question about your attraction towards this man Do you sense that he is trying to attract you? From my experiences when I find coworkers attractive in time you will become accustomed to working with him, as long as you can hold on your strengths resisting reinforce the attraction that is ok. I’m glad to know that you avoid him and desire to be faithful to your husband. Remember that love is not a feeling or emotions or to feel sparkles on the belly. Love is to make a decision for your husband not matter if you meet a man more intelligent, more attractive, more thoughtful, with more skills, more financially successful, etc. In the same way is for your husband. May I ask you: Is your husband possibly missing something from your fulfilling your needs or is there something that is affecting you in your relationship with your husband?
Counseling or therapy works through things like this. You and your husband are both valuable and worth of fighting for. ! I hope this helps. Sending you hugs. I will keep you in my prayers, my friend. Keep us posted, OK?.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

Really? I think it is good advice. If I'd told my husband instead of telling my crush things might be different now ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

Really? I think it is good advice. If I'd told my husband instead of telling my crush things might be different now ...

Just curious - why do you think it would be different had you told your husband?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go on a “business trip “ with him one weekend. Get it out of your system.

X2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he married? Get your DH to knock you up and the other guy won't pay any attention to you.

that's the plan!

Not if the coworker gets there first.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

Really? I think it is good advice. If I'd told my husband instead of telling my crush things might be different now ...

Guy here. This is a terrible advice. You don't go telling your DH about your fantasy about another man unless your DH is into MFM threesome.

If you do that, your marriage is pretty much over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

Really? I think it is good advice. If I'd told my husband instead of telling my crush things might be different now ...

Guy here. This is a terrible advice. You don't go telling your DH about your fantasy about another man unless your DH is into MFM threesome.

If you do that, your marriage is pretty much over.

Pretty much and it says something about the woman who thinks that telling her DH that she wants to f*^% another guy just in order to come clean and clear her conscience. Weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you're serious about wanting to stop this dynamic - tell your husband. In a mature way. If it bothers him, keep talking about it, go to therapy, etc. Once the secrecy of it is gone, the spark will fizzle.

Horrible advice. Do not do this.

Really? I think it is good advice. If I'd told my husband instead of telling my crush things might be different now ...

Guy here. This is a terrible advice. You don't go telling your DH about your fantasy about another man unless your DH is into MFM threesome.

If you do that, your marriage is pretty much over.

Three words, OP: The. Devil’s. Triangle. You can thank me later.