DH issue, advice please

[Anonymous]

My dh struggled with this for a bit, as he was ambivalent about wanting kids. What worked, and got him to finish quick, was me wearing something particular, his favorite position, and telling him that if he couldn’t get it done, I’d find a guy who could. No joke. It worked.

[Anonymous]

the Reality is do you really want to have kids with this guy and then spend 18 years have no sex?

Tell him he either goes to the urologist on the next 2 weeks
For a full checkup to resolve the ED problem or your leaving.

And then follow through. Find a guy who wants kids AND wants to show you he can perform.

[Anonymous]

You can do the turkey baster thing, but your husband needs to get to the doctor in any case to get his sperm tested. You don't want to find out he's shooting blanks, in addition to the ED.

[Anonymous]

Porn addiction

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op speaking. We had a long talk last night. He definitely wants kids, he was very emotional in speaking about it. He said that he wants to keep trying on his (our) own until the end of this year and if he can't get it to work he will see a doctor. That made me feel better, but then he said something that worried me. He said, "maybe we can watch porn to lighten the mood while we're trying" He's NEVER mentioned this before. When I questioned why on earth that would be needed he said that it often helps him. I didn't know what to say. It sounds like he's been watching it all along and it's what he's "used to". I don't know if I feel better or worse. And I don't know why porn now coming up after years of marriage

OP, my first thought was porn addiction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My dh struggled with this for a bit, as he was ambivalent about wanting kids. What worked, and got him to finish quick, was me wearing something particular, his favorite position, and telling him that if he couldn’t get it done, I’d find a guy who could. No joke. It worked.

Ouch. That would make any DH cry.

[Anonymous]

OP, I feel like there are a lot of issues here. It is very unusual for a guy that young to have ED problems. I agree it is probably either porn addiction, physical/hormonal problem, or he is gay or otherwise not sexually attracted to you. I would insist on a doctor ASAP. If you push forward with conceiving without addressing these issues, you are still going to have major sexual problems in your marriage. You will eventually find that to be crushing.

[Anonymous]

OP, you husband is a porn addict. If you want proof, Google it and look for the signs. Check his browser history; check the computer's chache'; pay attention to your intimacy level
(not sex, but the times that you all spending touching and cuddling).
Also, since you all have been trying to have a baby for 2.5 years, there's no reason for him to wait until January to see a doctor. This is just a delay strategy; in January, I am positive that he will have another reason to not go.
In addition, if you want to know what you life will look like years from now, look on this board for the threads, "No sex since.."
OP, please do not choose this life.

[Anonymous]

He needs to see a doctor and try a prescription for Viagra (or the much cheaper generic sildenafil). Taking a tablet an hour before, with the assistance you are giving him, he should be hard as a rock until completion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Buy some Instead Soft Cups. Pop some sperm in there and insert.

I've read that this does work!!! Also, another option is something like this: https://www.mosiebaby.com/ Cheaper than therapy or fertility treatments. GL.

[Anonymous]

If he jerks off too much it can make his member less sensitive.

[Anonymous]

OP ran away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP ran away.

LOL! Another satisfied OP!!! Glad to help!

Next.

[Anonymous]

He has an appt with the urologist tomorrow! Will get to the bottom of this. He asked me not to go, but I am going with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He has an appt with the urologist tomorrow! Will get to the bottom of this. He asked me not to go, but I am going with him.

Good for you!

If he's been masturbating to porn, he likely finds regular old intercourse not stimulating enough. You're going to find out if he's addicted to porn when the doc tells him to lay off for a month; if he can't do it, you've got your answer.