I think we have been dropped from playgroup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Since it is the spring break holidays, the mother who has a weekly playgroup one afternoon a week, switched to mornings, 10 to 12, even though she knows my DD naps at 11AM. The host mother texted me about the switch and I responded that we couldn't make it because of DD's nap and she just texted back that her daughter will miss my daughter. There are generally five to six kids, all around 2.5, who participate. I'd posted once before that I didn't think the host mother liked my DD (who is spirited and more active than the other kids including the boys). I guess I will wait to see if she moves playgroup back to the afternoons after this week but I really feel bad about this.

Maybe your child would be better behaved at a morning playdate. You should try it out.

I agree with this. Maybe your child's behavior issues are because of the weird nap time combined with late afternoon crankiness that a lot of kids who don't get enough sleep have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most likely you were dropped. But there is a polite way to find out. You live in a condo and can't host a play group but you can host a 1:1 playdate easily. Invite the host and her daughter to come over some day 3-5 pm. Say that your child misses her child and would love her to come over some day 3-5pm and that she can pick the day. If she takes you up on the offer then you were not dropped, they changed the playdate because it was more convenient for more kids/families. If she finds many excuses not to come, you've been dropped and you should find alternate play options for your child that are more convenient time-wise.

+1 Have you EVER invited the host-mother and her child over to your condo for a playdate?

[Anonymous]

While I agree it’s really weird to move a play date to morning for three weeks, I don’t think she’s trying to drop you. There are easier ways for her to do that. I think you should try out the morning play date. Your dd might act better, and you may be able to push the nap back.

It sounds like the other girls get along well, and I bet the mom does want you to still come. What will happen in 3 weeks?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound difficult

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While I agree it’s really weird to move a play date to morning for three weeks, I don’t think she’s trying to drop you. There are easier ways for her to do that. I think you should try out the morning play date. Your dd might act better, and you may be able to push the nap back.

It sounds like the other girls get along well, and I bet the mom does want you to still come. What will happen in 3 weeks?

I don't think it is weird to move the playgroup at all. All of my kid's morning classes took a two week break and I would rather have DS's mornings occupied than his afternoons. A lot of DS's friends go to morning daycare (Jewish) and all are closed this week.

If the host mom doesn't let you know that playgroup has gone back to afternoons next week, you have obviously been dropped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember your post. Yes, you were dropped.

+1 Your kid is always pushing and grabbing from the host's child, right? Yeah - you have been dropped.

Agree

I also agree...and actually OP, you were dropped in the nicest way possible that allowed you to "save face"--so please don't put her in the awkward position of having to spell it out for you by pushing back about the time. Just accept that it's not a good fit right now (at least for them) and move on. DD will bounce back. (And you will, too. You'll find your people, OP...but this just isn't the right group for you and DD. Hang in there.)

[Anonymous]

You weren't dropped. You said to the mom you couldn't make it at that time so they stopped inviting you.

[Anonymous]

She totally moved it to that time to kick you out. How wonderfully passive aggressive of this woman!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Since it is the spring break holidays, the mother who has a weekly playgroup one afternoon a week, switched to mornings, 10 to 12, even though she knows my DD naps at 11AM. The host mother texted me about the switch and I responded that we couldn't make it because of DD's nap and she just texted back that her daughter will miss my daughter. There are generally five to six kids, all around 2.5, who participate. I'd posted once before that I didn't think the host mother liked my DD (who is spirited and more active than the other kids including the boys). I guess I will wait to see if she moves playgroup back to the afternoons after this week but I really feel bad about this.

Your kid is an asshole. Recognize it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She totally moved it to that time to kick you out. How wonderfully passive aggressive of this woman!

She is the host, she can choose who she invites, and who she doesn't invite. There is nothing passive aggressive about it. OP's child had been deemed a bad fit for this group. OP needs to look for a different group or start her own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11 is a weird nap time for a 2.5 year old. Don't take it personally.

+1

+2 in all our toddler years we didn’t have any friends who took a nap at 11

[Anonymous]

Nobody cares about what time your kid naps. Nobody cares about you or your kid, other than that they find you (and your kid's) company acceptable or not. And clearly, they do not. I can see why.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She totally moved it to that time to kick you out. How wonderfully passive aggressive of this woman!

She is the host, she can choose who she invites, and who she doesn't invite. There is nothing passive aggressive about it. OP's child had been deemed a bad fit for this group. OP needs to look for a different group or start her own.

She needs to start the, "Spirited And Active Playgroup" which is code for, "I'm a shitty parent and my kid has no boundaries."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She totally moved it to that time to kick you out. How wonderfully passive aggressive of this woman!

I really have a strong dislike for you "brutal truth" people. OP is not an idiot and can probably see that there is an issue with her kid's behavior. Does she honestly need Polly Playgroup to rub her nose in it by spelling out that this is the reason??? (if it even IS the reason?)

I think if she did use this excuse as a way to re-structure the group to not include OP and her "high-spirited" kid, it is kind of her not to say "it's because we just can't take your DD's behavior anymore," not "passive aggressive." OP's DD will grow and mature and may not be such a handful in a year. Why should Polly Playgroup burn bridges with OP when they and their children may have occasion at a later time to reconnect?

If OP's daughter grows out of this stage (which she will) and OP ends up on the PTA with Polly and the other playgroup moms at a later time, it sure would be less awkward to rekindle the connection if they can both look back on this situation as a potential schedule conflict rather than OP seething about how Polly rudely criticized her DD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She totally moved it to that time to kick you out. How wonderfully passive aggressive of this woman!

What a ridiculous comment! First, no one knows if the mother did this for her stated reasons and the afternoon playgroup will start again next week or not. And second, how does the host mother know that OP wouldn't change her kid's nap schedule and attend the morning playgroup?! The kid is nearly 2.5 and should be napping later.