do you ask about guns at a family's house before letting your kid go to a playdate there?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We have guns. Dh is military. THey are locked up and I don’t know the combo and bullets are in a separate safe. Please ask. We will tell you and show you (the parent not the kids) the safe etc. if that still makes you uncomfortable that’s fine and my kid will ply at your house instead.

I don't have a problem with guns, and I'm also a veteran. But I'm always confused by this. I've never known military servicemembers to bring their guns home from work with them.

[Anonymous]

I've specifically discouraged a friendship between my child and another child because I know the parents have guns in the house. You have the right to keep them, and I have the right to stay away from you. I don't think it's any big loss on anyone's part.

[Anonymous]

I don’t always ask but I’m going to start, especially any house where my kids may be spending the night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am shy by nature and avoid unpleasant conversations more than any other person I have ever met. Flame me all you want, but this is the best I can do:

I always host the first playdate. When I invite the child over I always say to the parent, "And please don't worry, we have no guns in our house". If the parent doesn't chime in with "neither do we" type of rejoinder, my boys don't go over to their house - ever.

Yes, I am certain some parents don't get my prompt or are distracted - but it is the best I can do.

Good luck with that when your boys get older...you know, actually the age when this becomes a potential issue.

"I want to play at Mason's house!"

"You can't. Four years ago, when he came over for a playdate, his mom did not respond appropriately to my passive-aggressive quiz."

[Anonymous]

I always ask. We moved here from Arizona and it is a deadly problem there. It is the most important question you can ask.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I learned here on DCUM that many people lie about it.

You betcha. I am not going to tell you that I own guns unless you are a close personal friend. If you ask, I will lie.

Wow, so moral!

I lie that we have guns.

You are a liar, PP.

I only happened couple of time, and it was preceded by a "I don't want my kid in a house with guns". I don't want your kid in my house, because of that phrase. I said that we have guns, problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am shy by nature and avoid unpleasant conversations more than any other person I have ever met. Flame me all you want, but this is the best I can do:

I always host the first playdate. When I invite the child over I always say to the parent, "And please don't worry, we have no guns in our house". If the parent doesn't chime in with "neither do we" type of rejoinder, my boys don't go over to their house - ever.

Yes, I am certain some parents don't get my prompt or are distracted - but it is the best I can do.

Good luck with that when your boys get older...you know, actually the age when this becomes a potential issue.

"I want to play at Mason's house!"

"You can't. Four years ago, when he came over for a playdate, his mom did not respond appropriately to my passive-aggressive quiz."

Luckily my boys are popular and have lots of non-gun homes to visit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We don't ask. We assume many families have guns, and we'd only send our kid to houses where we know the parents well enough that we can trust them to keep the guns locked away.

We have guns locked away. We've been asked occasionally, and we've said that "No, we don't own any guns."

It's not information that we wish to disclose to anyone. It's a private matter. As far as other parents need to be concerned, there is absolutely no way that their kids will get their hands on our guns.

I don't get this. If you own guns, why are you ashamed to tell people? And as for other parents, aren't they to judge the situations they put their kids into?

I'm not ashamed. But it's a security issue, and it's a personal, private choice. Are you too "ashamed" to tell people your garage door code, or the balance of your investment holdings, or what medications you're taking? Absolutely not about "shame."

It's private information. Plain and simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I learned here on DCUM that many people lie about it.

You betcha. I am not going to tell you that I own guns unless you are a close personal friend. If you ask, I will lie.

Wow, so moral!

I lie that we have guns.

You are a liar, PP.

I only happened couple of time, and it was preceded by a "I don't want my kid in a house with guns". I don't want your kid in my house, because of that phrase. I said that we have guns, problem solved.

Great! Please keep your kids away!

[Anonymous]

I do not disclose that we have guns. They are safely stored. If you ask, I will lie. It's a security issue.

[Anonymous]

I've never been asked, which I find surprising because of my kids' friends' parents, we're probably the only Republicans. (We do not own any guns.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We don't ask. We assume many families have guns, and we'd only send our kid to houses where we know the parents well enough that we can trust them to keep the guns locked away.

We have guns locked away. We've been asked occasionally, and we've said that "No, we don't own any guns."

It's not information that we wish to disclose to anyone. It's a private matter. As far as other parents need to be concerned, there is absolutely no way that their kids will get their hands on our guns.

I don't get this. If you own guns, why are you ashamed to tell people? And as for other parents, aren't they to judge the situations they put their kids into?

I'm not ashamed. But it's a security issue, and it's a personal, private choice. Are you too "ashamed" to tell people your garage door code, or the balance of your investment holdings, or what medications you're taking? Absolutely not about "shame."

It's private information. Plain and simple.

Sweetie, if gun owners only killed each other, I would agree it was a private issue. But they don't. My kids lives are at stake and I find your lie particularly ugly and sinful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We don't ask. We assume many families have guns, and we'd only send our kid to houses where we know the parents well enough that we can trust them to keep the guns locked away.

We have guns locked away. We've been asked occasionally, and we've said that "No, we don't own any guns."

It's not information that we wish to disclose to anyone. It's a private matter. As far as other parents need to be concerned, there is absolutely no way that their kids will get their hands on our guns.

I don't get this. If you own guns, why are you ashamed to tell people? And as for other parents, aren't they to judge the situations they put their kids into?

I'm not ashamed. But it's a security issue, and it's a personal, private choice. Are you too "ashamed" to tell people your garage door code, or the balance of your investment holdings, or what medications you're taking? Absolutely not about "shame."

It's private information. Plain and simple.

Sweetie, if gun owners only killed each other, I would agree it was a private issue. But they don't. My kids lives are at stake and I find your lie particularly ugly and sinful.

Fortunately for you, if our kids happen to play together, it will never be an issue and you'll be none the wiser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH is a Law Enforcement Officer and encourages parents to ask about firearms in our home. It is irresponsible not to.

Yes, DH has a job that requires him to carry a firearm home every day. He stores the gun in a safe, unloaded, and the ammunition in a separate lock box on the top shelf of the garage before he comes into the house. We explain this to parents and understand 100% if they prefer to not allow their child to come over.

Your DH is one of the few responsible gun owners. I applaud his rigor and honesty and your acceptance that parents still might be uncomfortable with their kids playing at your house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We don't ask. We assume many families have guns, and we'd only send our kid to houses where we know the parents well enough that we can trust them to keep the guns locked away.

We have guns locked away. We've been asked occasionally, and we've said that "No, we don't own any guns."

It's not information that we wish to disclose to anyone. It's a private matter. As far as other parents need to be concerned, there is absolutely no way that their kids will get their hands on our guns.

I don't get this. If you own guns, why are you ashamed to tell people? And as for other parents, aren't they to judge the situations they put their kids into?

I'm not ashamed. But it's a security issue, and it's a personal, private choice. Are you too "ashamed" to tell people your garage door code, or the balance of your investment holdings, or what medications you're taking? Absolutely not about "shame."

It's private information. Plain and simple.

Sweetie, if gun owners only killed each other, I would agree it was a private issue. But they don't. My kids lives are at stake and I find your lie particularly ugly and sinful.

Fortunately for you, if our kids happen to play together, it will never be an issue and you'll be none the wiser.

I am certain you have other incredibly immoral positions besides being a liar that I would shun.