Host informs parents "don't bring your monsters"

[Anonymous]

Met rude with rude. Makes sense to me.

[Anonymous]

It's a 21 yo. What do you expect?

[Anonymous]

I'm 41 so I wouldn't attend a 21 yr old's birthday party anyway.

That was an incredibly rude way to say "This is an adults only celebration, but it'll be great to see all the kids at the family's Annual Easter get-together."

[Anonymous]

It's a rude message, but asking to bring your kids to this type of party and especially asking for free babysitting is ruder. It sounds like the host received too many of these inquiries and got fed up.

[Anonymous]

Forget it. It was tongue in cheek funny, and I have 2 “monsters.” I would just laugh, especially if the host doesn’t have kids. Totally out of line for relatives to ask for childcare at a “coming of drinking age” party! I mean, are the kids going to Uber home with the ?! So weird people even did that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay out of it.

He is amazingly rude though and I'm not sure I would be interested in attending. Is he always so rude?

He can be blunt at times but I have not known him to be this outright rude. What surprises me is the second host who has allowed this message to stand. She is a very kind and considerate person.

What surprises me is that anyone would be rude enough to ask them to consider having a babysitting service available. Really??!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stay out of it.

He is amazingly rude though and I'm not sure I would be interested in attending. Is he always so rude?

He can be blunt at times but I have not known him to be this outright rude. What surprises me is the second host who has allowed this message to stand. She is a very kind and considerate person.

You are getting really hung up on this message OP.

I'd actually laugh about it. It sorta sounds like he was trying to be funny.

This.

OP, I'm feeling sorrier for this guy because he's celebrating his 21st with a bunch of sticks in the mud.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's a rude message, but asking to bring your kids to this type of party and especially asking for free babysitting is ruder. It sounds like the host received too many of these inquiries and got fed up.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a rude message, but asking to bring your kids to this type of party and especially asking for free babysitting is ruder. It sounds like the host received too many of these inquiries and got fed up.

+1

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 41 so I wouldn't attend a 21 yr old's birthday party anyway.

That was an incredibly rude way to say "This is an adults only celebration, but it'll be great to see all the kids at the family's Annual Easter get-together."

Yes, it was rude, but it sounds like he said that, and his relatives responded by demanding that he pay for free babysitting.

"Monsters" was a little uncalled for, but sometimes you need to be crystal clear when you're setting boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I received a group invite via facebook to a relatives 21st birthday party in March. It is being hosted by her brother and cousin. They are renting an event space and will have a DJ and open bar. From the website it looks like they are going all out. I am very much looking forward to the party. It never even crossed my mind to bring my child to a party like this. There was an updated message posted in the invite. My cousin wrote this:

"I have received some inquiries about if children were allowed at the party. I should have been clear at the beginning I suppose but this is not a party for kids. I have even had some cheap people go as far as to ask me to provide a "party room" for kids with babysitting at the venue. I want to make something absolutely clear. Children are NOT welcome. Keep your monsters at home. I will not pay for any sort of babysitting service. I uninvited certain members of my own family for being so presumptions from this party. Anyone else asks me to provide free babysitting your invitation will be rescinded. This is a 21st birthday party not a wedding."

I understand completely that some family members were out of line. I completely get that. I also think that has to be one of the rudest messages from a host I have ever read. I know he is upset but I feel he was out of line. It has created a *** storm. His own mother is apologizing for his rude message and neither host will remove the message from the facebook group invite. I was thinking of calling the second host and ask her to remove it. My husband says to stay out of it. What should I do?

Guys like this grow up with a mother still washing his sh*** skids at age 21. She probably does everything for him. And if he’s like most people, he hates your kids, just as you hate other people’s kids, but he hasn’t learned to be poised about it, because nobody cared to teach the little effing ahole how to be civilized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s simple, don’t bring your monsters. Why is that hard to understand? Not everyone likes kids. You might think yours are somehow special. They’re not.

This has nothing to do with "not liking kids". I love kids. I'm a teacher, plus having kids was the most important thing to me.

If I was planning an "open bar dance party" for my 21st birthday, I still wouldn't want young kids there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This party is for my soon to be 21 year old cousin and its being hosted by her 30 y/o brother and another cousin. Everyone seems to be really looking forward to it. He lined up a "famous" DJ and everyone is prepared to dance the night away. The message he posted is so unacceptable.

Stay out of it. This is one of those situations wher two wrongs don’t make a right. It’s a bit ridiculous to me that relatives would not only ask to bring their kids but then follow-up to ask them to provide free babysitting- and clearly it was more than one person! And just think, these were the ones that DID ask, they are probably some that figure it’s better to ask forgiveness than permission.

The ttle monsters was a bit much IMO unless he was trying to joke/be sarcastic. He could have worded it as no one under 21 would be allowed underage minor will be turned away at the door. Cause I could see that people are just that bold. This is bringing back wedding flashbacks of the people that brought their kids anyway despite the Miss Manners discrete way of addressing the invite, spreading the words not on the invite including mentioning the hotel services for a baby sitter etc. and of course the people that brought their kids didn’t RSVP with the kids included for obvious reasons that they knew. We’ve stayed home from a wedding before or just had one of us go due to childcare.

The bolded is absurd. Pretty much every person I know has some people who are younger than they are in their friendship circle. You can have a party and invite a young adult's friends, some of whom might be 19 or 20, without needing to include 2 year olds.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it's appallingly rude and entitled behavior, but you shouldn't get involved with asking him to remove it. You can decide whether you want to go or not, but that's the extent of what you can do.

The rude and entitled behavior is that of the parents who think their kids are welcome everywhere and expect a party room—even at an obviously ADULT event.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There was a time when I would have considered that to be a rude message.

And then I discovered DCUM. And I realized that there's a whole bunch of people out there who are incapable of reasoning, have no common sense, no common courtesy, think the rules don't apply to them because they're special, and generally think they're entitled to anything they want regardless of how it affects other people.

As you said, it wouldn't have occurred to you (or me) to bring our children to such an event, but evidently it did occur to some other people. And some other people evidently thought that they were SO entitled to bring children that there should be special accommodations made for said children on the host's dime.

So now I'd read that message, think that he's a typically abrasive 21 year old guy who is shocked at the entitlement of people and wanting to make it perfectly clear that they want to enjoy the party they worked hard to organize without kids there.

You have every right to not go if the invite offends you so much, but you have zero right to complain about it.

x1000

Bravo. This. Exactly this.

+1