Is 40 too old for a baby?

[Anonymous]

I had my son a few months shy of 40. It's kept me younger, in my opinion. But I only have one.

The plusses are more money (for us anyway; I would have been broke at 25), more career flexibility, and more patience.

The money is key, IMO. We have great life insurance, etc. in case something does happen. The college fund is paid. We have someone who will love our child almost like we do, if something happens to us.

It's not so much that someone might die early. But there is more of a possibility of job loss, along with the corresponding income loss. It's harder to find high paying jobs when you are older, because of age discrimination. It's very different from when you are 25 and climbing in your career. So to me, sufficient savings are critical.

Other health issues, too, that might slow you down, vs. actually kill you. AND, you might be part of the sandwich generation, caring both physically and financially for parents as well as young kids. So those are some considerations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would be worried about birth defects and SNs with 47 yo sperm. Risk goes way up.

Unlikely, the most risk is from our moms after age 35

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to be done by 37 or else the baby may be deformed or mental problem due to ama

Hate to break it to you, but younger moms have babies with problems as well. And many over 40 have perfectly healthy children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH is 47 and we just had our 2nd three months ago. He has more energy than I do and I'm 32. So I say it's fine depending on the person.

Are you wife #2?

Yep. Hate all you want, married nearly a decade, two great kids and a happy life (no kids with his ex).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH is 47 and we just had our 2nd three months ago. He has more energy than I do and I'm 32. So I say it's fine depending on the person.

Are you wife #2?

Yep. Hate all you want, married nearly a decade, two great kids and a happy life (no kids with his ex).

Whoa you married a 37 year old divorced guy when you were 22? How did your parents feel about that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to be done by 37 or else the baby may be deformed or mental problem due to ama

Hate to break it to you, but younger moms have babies with problems as well. And many over 40 have perfectly healthy children.

Learn to read your own stats. Vast majority of births over 40 are healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to be done by 37 or else the baby may be deformed or mental problem due to ama

Hate to break it to you, but younger moms have babies with problems as well. And many over 40 have perfectly healthy children.

Learn to read your own stats. Vast majority of births over 40 are healthy.

Learn to read.

[Anonymous]

How is your general health?
Do you get easily winded when walking up a flight of stairs or running after something like your dog?

Are your sugar/cholesterol levels in check?

I would say energy level + good health would be the most vital determining factor here since both are needed to be an optimal parent bar none.

And some people are less healthier and fit in mid/life.

[Anonymous]

It’s such a personal decision. I know moms who had kids later and it all worked out well. I’m turning 40 in 2 months and I can’t fathom dealing with a newborn again.

[Anonymous]

I had my first at 39 and now At 40 trying for another one. It's so individual for everyone. I got married late and that's why I'm having kids late. Don't feel too old.

[Anonymous]

Adopted at 45. Do not feel too old. Go for it!

[Anonymous]

I had my first at 42. Other than being "old," my pregnancy was normal and easy. My son is now 19 months and the joy of my life. I'm not any more tired than I was before he was born.

[Anonymous]

I'm 40 and we're TTC our second now. Our dd is almost 2. We've been trying longer this time and I miscarried (very early) a few months ago. My doctor cautioned that getting a staying pregnant will be harder at this age, but not to lose hope. Based on that, my only advice would be to start soon if you decide to start trying.

[Anonymous]

As many have said, it varies individually. In term TTC, no it's not too old. But in terms of your energy level to keep up with the child during the early years, some people might struggle and some might not. Financially, some might also struggle if you want to finance the child's college education because you'll be near/at the tail end of you career. Again, it all depends. However, the simple answer to your question is that 40 is not "too" old, but old for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me, yes.

If I had no children and just got married? I would definitely try to have a baby.

But at 40, I have children and do not want to start that part over.

This is me, too. If I had no kids, being 40 would not stop me from trying. But I already had two kids when we considered one more at 40 and decided that better not to chance it -- quit while we are ahead. If we had a first at 40 who turned out to have significant special needs, fine. But when you are talking about a third, (or second or fourth or whatever), all of that affects your older children, too. Something to consider ...