When did you start having Christmas in your own home?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Prepped my in laws for it while I was pregnant. My kid was going to have xmas at home. Just like I did. AND just like his dad did.


This. I was 7mos pregnant at Christmas, and didn't want to travel the 5hrs to either of our parents. Haven't traveled for Christmas since.
Anonymous
I don't recall exactly but I'm pretty sure it was when our oldest was about three or so and really began to get into Christmas. We would have Christmas Eve and morning at our house and then either drive to DH's parents or fly to mine. Over time more of the holiday was spent at our house.
Anonymous
When I had kids
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Stayed home once I had kids.

I want my kids to remember Christmas morning in their family home.

4 hours is a short enough drive that you can leave early afternoon and have Christmas dinner with the extended family and have Christmas morning at your house. That’s what I did growing up.


I will agree with the first two lines. I would NEVER agree to spend four hours in the car ON Christmas though. Nope, no thank you. I'd consider a 2 hour drive, but not four hours one way.

Kids wake up at home on Christmas. Anyone who'd like to see them open presents is welcome to come over around their wake up time, which is 6am currently. Otherwise, we'll see you later for dinner.
Anonymous
The year the first kid was born.

We travel for Thanksgiving (alternating families each year) and travel to a holiday party that family members host a couple weeks before Xmas. But for actual Xmas eve and Xmas day we are home. People are welcome to come to us but we are home. Love it.
Anonymous
Once we had two kids.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Married 18 years, tween kids, and still drive to see family 4 hours away every year. It's our"normal". Kids love to spend time with cousins, and we like to visit with family. NBD.


But when your kids get married and the grandparents are gone you won't have one single holiday tradition at your house to fall back on.

I don't see how location matters to activities (do families that move a lot not have holiday traditions?), and I don't see why we can't start doing things at our house once my parents are gone.

Your kids won't have anywhere to go for Christmas and won't come to your house. This happened to me.


Wait, what? My kids will cruise the streets aimlessly and will shun me? I am not worried about this. If they don't start coming to our house and don't want us to come to theirs, we'll find something to do. And if they want us to come wherever they live, we'll happily do that.

We're resilient.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Married 18 years, tween kids, and still drive to see family 4 hours away every year. It's our"normal". Kids love to spend time with cousins, and we like to visit with family. NBD.


But when your kids get married and the grandparents are gone you won't have one single holiday tradition at your house to fall back on. Your kids won't have anywhere to go for Christmas and won't come to your house. This happened to me.


Huh? According to this pattern, when your kids get married and have kids, they won't come to your house anyway, because they will want Christmas in their own home.

Also, I will absolutely have holiday traditions to fall back on. My traditions are not location-dependent. I can still bake cookies, have a Christmas tree, decorate the house, prepare a nice meal--just as I do now. My kids will absolutely be able to come home for Christmas, and enjoy the same activities that we currently do at the grandparents' house.
Anonymous
It's tricky. I would say growing up we did a 50/50 mix of Christmas at home and traveling to the grandparents for an extended trip. I know it was an area of contention for my mom, as she wanted us to have some memories at home, but my grandparents were 100% unwilling to travel to us. So the years we were at home, we just didn't see the grandparents at Christmas. With a small family, this of course also caused her a ton of guilt.

Now, I am 36yo, with one 5yo. My husband is Jewish, and not really into Christmas. I would say he "tolerates" it. We've been together for 11 years, and we've next to never done Christmas at home, but with the kid on the scene, we have without fail gone to my parents every year. It's stressful, and I don't love it, but it is nice for me to be able to compartmentalize the holiday to Christmas happens at "Nana and PopPop's" house. This past year, my daughter started asking more questions about us having a tree, and decorating and what not. So eventually it might be something I take on more of, but it's hard to say where we are going with it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We don't. Both my DH and I enjoy seeing our families, and our SD enjoys Christmas morning with her cousins.


+1

I grew up travelling to Grandma's house for Christmas.


+1 My kids love spending Thanksgiving and Christmas at their grandparents with all their cousins. I grew up in an immigrant family, and didn't have any of that extended family fun, and I'm so grateful that my kids have it. Plus on a practical note, hosting is a ton of work, especially to put together good holiday meals and have a lot of people sleeping at your house. Count me super happy to go to the grandparents--one day they will not be around, and we won't have that option.
Anonymous
We started staying home once we had baby #1. We are both children of divorce and wanted to start fresh with our family. Now I'm so glad we did because I have great memories of fun & relaxing Christmases in our home. Anyone is welcome to join us, and they have. We've traveled twice at Christmas over the years and after the last time, I remembered why we stay home.
Anonymous
The first year we had a baby. It was supposed to be our year at the ILs (3-hr drive) but Xmas was on a Thursday and DH had to be at work on Friday the 26th. So we decided to wait and go to the ILs for the weekend. It was so nice to be home for the day and go to Xmas services at our church that we decided from then on to stay home. We'd go down to the ILs for New Year's and my plane-ride-away parents would come visit us every other year.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Stayed home once I had kids.

I want my kids to remember Christmas morning in their family home.

4 hours is a short enough drive that you can leave early afternoon and have Christmas dinner with the extended family and have Christmas morning at your house. That’s what I did growing up.


That sounds miserable. So kids get a quickie Christmas morning and then pack into the car for a long drive? Sounds like a great way to have them associate Christmas with a long and boring car ride. One of the best parts of Christmas is just hanging out and relaxing. Can't imagine subjecting my kids to that.


We frequently do this and my DCs don't mind it at all. We spend several hours at home on Christmas morning, then they choose their favorite new toys to show their cousins and we hit the road around lunch time. They're up at 6:00 in the morning, so that's a solid 6 hours of Christmas fun in our house. Then they're so excited to open presents all over again at their grandparents' house the car ride flies by. Plus we watch Christmas movies in the car.

To answer OP's question, we started having Christmas morning in our house when DC #1 was 5. It just got to be too much hassle and the last year we went the weather was awful during the drive.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Huh? According to this pattern, when your kids get married and have kids, they won't come to your house anyway, because they will want Christmas in their own home.

Also, I will absolutely have holiday traditions to fall back on. My traditions are not location-dependent. I can still bake cookies, have a Christmas tree, decorate the house, prepare a nice meal--just as I do now. My kids will absolutely be able to come home for Christmas, and enjoy the same activities that we currently do at the grandparents' house.


This works if you have a role and a say in how Christmas unfolds at your parents' or in-laws. If you are at the mercy of the hosts' view of how Christmas should be done, and you are practically just a guest and a bystander, it's not that easy.
Anonymous
Still go to Grandma's house. It gets easier as the kids get older. And for us its just where Christmas memories are made. We also have plenty of memories in our own house -- putting up the tree, decorating inside and out, advent calendars, baking cookies, etc.
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