cheerleaders excessive bullying
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
| Coach actually said if your daughter stopped crying they would stop bullying her?! Really??? So it's your daughter's reaction that's the problem and not the behavior of the bullies? Get that coach fired. |
Anonymous
| OP this is beyond egregious. Former HS and college cheerleader and cheer coach here. HELL NO!!! They are literally endangering your child's LIFE. Cheerleading injuries to flyers can be truly catastrophic. Think compound fractures with bone piercing skin, spinal cord injuries, concussions and brain damage. I have seen it all. I left one all star team as a high schooler because they did not take safety seriously and I was not a flyer. This is completely out of line. I would elevate this to the principal, the athletic director, the county athletic director and maybe even the superintendent. That coach needs to be out of a job. Imagine how many other girls have been tormented because of her. Imagine a girl who was (or will be) bullied by these little wenches that doesn't have caring and involved parents? This is how teen suicide happens. |
Anonymous
|
I'm generally incredibly hands off past middle school and usually of the opinion that teens need to make their own decisions about how to handle situations based on what they consider to be important priorities. In most bullying situations, I would say stay out of it except to offer to help the child come up with a plan to deal with it if they want it to stop, and if my kid wanted to continue with an activity in spite of others' rude behavior I would consider that their decision.
However, one of the few areas in which I think it is not only unquestionably a parent's right but also our responsibility to step in, is when safety concerns are involved. This goes well beyond what I would call typical bullying and the behavior presents and actual threat of physical harm to your daughter. At this point, I personally would say that I had to reluctantly overrule her wishes and either contact the coach and principal to get this behavior dealt with or insist she quit cheerleading. I would definitely sit down with her and have a discussion explaining my reasoning, but ultimately as a parent my minor child's safety is my responsibility and I don't think I could let my daughter continue taking such major risks due to other kids mistreating her. |
Anonymous
|
I've been following this board today and commented once.
I hope you're doing well today op. I think this is s lot, but you can do it. The other random idea I had: if staying on the team is a top priority, she could stop being a flier at least. No one had mentioned that, I don't think. That's one simple solution before other solutions are reached. |
Anonymous
I know a cheerleader who got a TBI from being dropped. OP, get her the hell off the squad. If they're dropping her, her physical safety is at tremendous risk. |
Anonymous
| Mean cheerleaders!? Who ever heard of such a thing? |
Anonymous
| Well - if you complain and she still goes to practice, I can see an "accident' is waiting to happen. time carefully |
Anonymous
|
I would send an email to the coach and cc the principal. Or skip that step and go to the principal, telling him/her that you've already tried to address it with the coach. If that doesn't work, I'd send one to the principal and cc the superintendent and school board members.
I also didn't read a lot of the other responses, and I'm sure you are much more knowledgeable than I am, but I can't imagine there is a lot of money out there to be given out to college cheerleaders. I was a college cheerleader at a D1 school and there was no money back then - I would think it's even harder now. Maybe Title 9 helps a bit if it's a school that doesn't have a lot of women's sports, but overall, it is not something that I'd put up with this kind of behavior in the hopes of. Not to mention - IF THEY DROP HER DOING STUNTS, she could get seriously hurt and there goes that scholarship, anyway. (not to mention the more serious issue - of a really bad injury - potentially a head injury or something) |
Anonymous
|
I am surprised that high school cheer would be a path to scholarships. I would have thought gym/competitive teams would have been a bigger draw for a girl wanting a scholarship. If she is good at it and likes it, I would pursue a competitive team. OTOH if she likes cheer because of the extra social perks at school, well then her choice is to grin and bear it. I know you started off with how different she is from all the others but be realistic and think back to when you were in HS. Most kids wanted to be liked and admired by their peers.
As far as the coach, I bet you are right and she does want to be "popular" with the senior girls and just doesn't know herself how to effectively intervene. She might even be afraid of the girls herself to some extent. |
Anonymous
|
I would write an email to the coach, documenting your concerns and her response. Quote her as much as possible. CC the principal, the school board, and the superintendent. In addition to making her feel awful, those girls are putting your daughter at risk of physical injury, and coach is unwilling to stop it. This is utterly unacceptable.
Tell your daughter that you understand why she wants to keep cheering, but you cannot in good conscience let her continue because of the risk that she will be seriously injured. Help her research other cheer opportunities, if it's something she otherwise enjoys and wants to continue. |
Anonymous
Lol, that was funny. Seriously though, I think we mostly think of cheerleaders as being mean to non-cheerleaders. Not to other cheerleaders on their team. |
Anonymous
| Drop a note to the principal and use the word hazing. Chattanooga is losing a whole bunch of coaches and school officials over a hazing issue and its being taken VERY seriously as a result. Written expressions of concern are taken much more seriously (paper trail) than anything verbal. Do not obey your daughter's request not to talk. Think about how you will feel if she has a serious injury or ends up with mental issues over this. If he's smart, he'll jerk a note in the coach's tail and tell her to keep it to herself. |
Anonymous
| If she's a good cheerleader, she'll likely be a good diver, and much more likely to receive a significant scholarship and escape injury. Plus, its a real sport. |
Anonymous
| OP, hope you are taking steps to protect your daughter and others. Because your kid is not the first nor will she be the last that these girls torment and potentially injure. |
Anonymous
| Don't forget to also contact the Athletic Director. |