What were your parents' rules for you after you graduated college?

[Anonymous]

I think if you live at home, you just need to be respectful.

[Anonymous]

I moved home because I had student loans I needed to pay off and I wanted to save money.

Only rule was to pay rent. No curfew. I gave my dad (the primary homemaker at the time) a list of things I wanted from the grocery store which basically consisted of cereal, milk, yogurt, bread, PB and J. (He generally did not charge me for food.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:e.g. What was your curfew?

Let's see. Parents paid for college, I was responsible for my pin money. No curfew in HS, so didn't even come up after college. I moved home after graduation as I did not have anything lined up. It was 1986 and there was a recession. I temped until I found something. I moved to DC as a result and have been here ever since. I didn't pay rent but I saved quite a bit from the temping so I had some starting off money. Nothing was tied to caring for grandchildren. SInce they were not nearby, we saw them mainly on vacation and during a few holidays. DH and I had children after my parents moved to coastal NC for retirement and we would never ever move there.

My sister lived at home for a few years after college, before moving to an apartment, no curfew for her either. SHe saved while at home, so rent and other expenses would not be a shock.

I guess, if there were problems, we would have set up some house rules, but we were all respectful and treated each other like adults.

I will add that my Dad moved in with us last summer and is now receiving hospice care in our home, but I ask his primary caretaker. He has 2-4 months.

Wishing you and your dad the best at this tough time, PP. I hope he has a peaceful transition when the time comes.

[Anonymous]

My parents paid for college. The only rule after graduation was that I had to pay for rent and car insurance. There is no curfew for a 21-year-old.

[Anonymous]

I'll bite.

I was the fourth (and last child) to go to college and be fully funded by my father. He educated all of us and at one time he had three concurrent tuition payments. We had more rules pertaining to college admissions and student life. Don't recall any rules for after graduation.

We all stayed in state. Rule one.

No part-time jobs off campus. I was an RA to offset tuition.

Worked for spending money every break; we all had office positions on winter and summer (sometimes spring) breaks.

We were required to graduate in four years. I had to do summer school and take 18 (!) credit hours for two semesters, but I did it.

No extracurricular activities would be funded by dad. Fraternity? We had to pay for it.

No car at school.

[Anonymous]

I didn't move "home" after college; I got a job and scrabbled to support myself from the start. It would have been bizarre if my dad (mom isn't living) HAD tried to impose "rules" on me, a self-supporting adult who didn't live in his home.

[Anonymous]

How exactly would one enforce rules on adult children? What are you going to do, ground them? LOL!

[Anonymous]

Pay health and car insurance on my own. Quite a big chunk because they always cover it before.

[Anonymous]

I'm confused as to whether OP is the parent or the child. I think OP is the child.

OP, if you don't like the rules in your parent's house, rent a room somewhere and move out. Or, pay some rent to your parents in exchange for the removal of the curfew. Be an adult and run your own life.

[Anonymous]

I had no rules post graduation and parents paid for private college. I was living in a group house in another state so not sure how rules would have been enforced. My DC graduated last year and lives in another country. We have no rules for her. Not even sure what rules we could have!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, I should have been more clear. This question is aimed at the people whose college was paid for by their parents, not those people who paid their own way through.

None. I was expected to get a job and support myself. I didn't go home and live with my parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, I should have been more clear. This question is aimed at the people whose college was paid for by their parents, not those people who paid their own way through.

Why does it make any difference?

Parents cannot impose rules on their adult children. If those children are living in their parents' house, however, it is reasonable to set expectations with regard to paying for room and board (if applicable); who buys and replenishes food; cleaning; and so on.

[Anonymous]

My parents paid for my undergraduate education. After I graduated, I worked and lived on my own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorry, I should have been more clear. This question is aimed at the people whose college was paid for by their parents, not those people who paid their own way through.

Parents paid for mine. I still did what I wanted, because by the time I graduated college I was an adult.

Well, most people become adults their freshman or sophomore years of college, and even when they're done, they usually still have to listen to Mommy and Daddy because of the bad economy.

Not really. Our expectation is that our adult children will live on their own.

Our friends' kids are all doing this.

[Anonymous]

My parents request was that we visit for the holidays.