My boyfriend loves me, but has no sex drive.

[Anonymous]

I agree with PP that it can work only if you're asexual too
But the emotionless and empty part speaks if emotional problems that need to be sorted out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My boyfriend loves me. We've been together for a year. We have never had sex. We didn't want to jump into it. Well, now I'm ready - and I've brought it up to him. He told me that he has zero sex drive. He feels empty and emotionless. He physically can't have sex. But he says that he loves me and wants a future with me. What do I do? Is there anything I can say/do to help him "snap out of this"?

there is nothing you can do to help him snap out of this. All you can do is be honest with yourself on what you can live with and be honest with him. Never marry someone assuming they will change to what you want, ask yourself instead can you live with x behavior for the next 20-30 years. If the answer is no, be honest. Let him know that you aren't asking him to change, that you are instead being honest that sex is an important part of a relationship and feeling bonded/close and can't see going the rest of the foreseeable future with no sex. Let him think on it. He can either decide that it is important to him to figure out how to get himself back on track or he finds someone that can be happy with him having zero sex drive.

[Anonymous]

Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

He's on Lexipro

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are both thirteen, this is weird to me.

Either he is gay or perhaps he has a hard time getting it up.

This has zero to do with you and everything to do with him.

A year is a long time to wait...For nothing.

You need to be honest about this. Are you overweight at all? Do you take care of yourself?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Unless you are both thirteen, this is weird to me.

Either he is gay or perhaps he has a hard time getting it up.

This has zero to do with you and everything to do with him.

A year is a long time to wait...For nothing.

You need to be honest about this. Are you overweight at all? Do you take care of yourself?

Please, I am not overweight at all. Yes, I take care of myself. Next question...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

He's on Lexipro

Antidepressants can kill libido.

1) Ask him if he was like this before Lexipro. If he was, then low sex drive is just who he is. If not, then 2) ask him if he is willing to try other antidepressants like Wellbutrin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

He's on Lexipro

Antidepressants can kill libido.

1) Ask him if he was like this before Lexipro. If he was, then low sex drive is just who he is. If not, then 2) ask him if he is willing to try other antidepressants like Wellbutrin.

He was NOT like this before the Lexipro....he said he thought about sex daily then...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

I assume you are on propecia or proscar, and trying to maintain your hair is not worth the side effects, which have been determined to be more permanent in nature than originally thought. Vanity is not worth the cost.

[Anonymous]

Don't go into a marriage thinking you can change the other person, esp about something like this.

[Anonymous]

I was in a marriage like this for 8 years. It is soul sucking. Do not do this to yourself

[Anonymous]

Is he healthy? Normal weight?

[MikeL]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

I assume you are on propecia or proscar, and trying to maintain your hair is not worth the side effects, which have been determined to be more permanent in nature than originally thought. Vanity is not worth the cost.

Keeping my hair or keeping my boner?
Not a hard(ha ha) choice at all. Bald is beautiful!

[Anonymous]

MikeL wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is he on any drugs that could be causing it? I'm on some stuff to keep my hair and my erections suck.

I assume you are on propecia or proscar, and trying to maintain your hair is not worth the side effects, which have been determined to be more permanent in nature than originally thought. Vanity is not worth the cost.

Keeping my hair or keeping my boner?
Not a hard(ha ha) choice at all. Bald is beautiful!

Actually bald is ugly, unless you have cancer.

[Anonymous]

OP, you should check his phone and see if he has Adam4Adam app on it.