Moms of boys....

[Anonymous]

Yes, lighten up. You shouldn't be correcting other kids. I wouldn't be ok with my son saying those things. My daughter throws better than him and is a very tough girl. Hell, I wish she was a little less rough. I would never use "like a girl" as an insult but we have used "be a man" and phrases like that to our son. Face it, we don't want to call girls weak but it's a double standard for boys. How many of you asked that other poster if the guy was gay?

[Anonymous]

It's not just an insult to girls, at it's heart, when a boy is accused of playing like a girl, crying like a girl, being a momma's boy, etc., it's shaming him for having qualities that are perceived as feminine (not being good at sports, being sensitive, being affectionate with family). These kind of statements are inherently misogynistic and homophobic. And then we wonder why men can't express their feelings as adults or feel like they have to posture as macho men. So it's about boys and girls and what roles we allow them to fill or not fill.

There are ways to correct or teach others' kids without appearing as Joey's killjoy feminist mother. I.e., watch me throw the ball Joey and friends, pretty good for a girl, hah. You can use a sense of humor or touch base with your kid later and discuss it. It doesn't have to be a call out in the middle of the field.

The PP's using the old politically correct, college campus, lighten up excuses are not saying anything new.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't lighten up, keep correcting.

Yeah, this is my thought, too. I don't hear it often, but I tell the kids I can out throw them any day. And then do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you should lighten up. Seriously, not a big deal. But more importantly, I don't think you should be "correcting" other people's kids based on what is ultimately an issue of personal politics/values. A lot of people disagree that this is a problem, presumably including the other boys' parents. Would you chide them for not recycling a water bottle? Wearing a "redskins" shirt? This isn't a college campus. Nobody cares about your views, liberal and admirable and culturally sensitive though they may be.

I would completely correct my child for not recycling - I'm shocked you wouldn't. As for that shirt, it wouldn't be an option. We are part Native American. It's offensive, I also don't associate with racists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should lighten up. Seriously, not a big deal. But more importantly, I don't think you should be "correcting" other people's kids based on what is ultimately an issue of personal politics/values. A lot of people disagree that this is a problem, presumably including the other boys' parents. Would you chide them for not recycling a water bottle? Wearing a "redskins" shirt? This isn't a college campus. Nobody cares about your views, liberal and admirable and culturally sensitive though they may be.

I would completely correct my child for not recycling - I'm shocked you wouldn't. As for that shirt, it wouldn't be an option. We are part Native American. It's offensive, I also don't associate with racists.

Is reading comprehension an option? Because the point was about "correcting" other people's children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should lighten up. Seriously, not a big deal. But more importantly, I don't think you should be "correcting" other people's kids based on what is ultimately an issue of personal politics/values. A lot of people disagree that this is a problem, presumably including the other boys' parents. Would you chide them for not recycling a water bottle? Wearing a "redskins" shirt? This isn't a college campus. Nobody cares about your views, liberal and admirable and culturally sensitive though they may be.

Not PP, but I would absolutely feel comfortable saying something to a kid who said "throw like a girl" or "cry like a girl" in my presence. I would also ask a kid in a Redskin jersey to change it or go home. (I'd offer a tshirt). We don't allow misogyny or racism in our house. If the kid's parents don't like it, they can keep their kid home.

You don't have to be rude to correct someone on "throw like a girl." You can just say sometihng about a famous Olympian or the little league pitcher from last year or whatever.

There's no hope for people who insist on redskins as a team name. It's as bad as using the N-word.

are you serious?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mom of two boys ages 7 and 11.

Yes, you need to lighten up. In fact, I use that expression myself. We all have a good laugh.

Girls and Boys are different. Nothing wrong with that. And BTW, this is part of teaching my boys to ADORE girls.

Your kids wouldn't be invited to play at my house. I don't want my son to ADORE girls. I want him to RESPECT them. You are teaching your kids to be disrespectful.

One day they'll have a female boss, or interview for a job with one. Then the disrespect you've taught them will be regretted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should lighten up. Seriously, not a big deal. But more importantly, I don't think you should be "correcting" other people's kids based on what is ultimately an issue of personal politics/values. A lot of people disagree that this is a problem, presumably including the other boys' parents. Would you chide them for not recycling a water bottle? Wearing a "redskins" shirt? This isn't a college campus. Nobody cares about your views, liberal and admirable and culturally sensitive though they may be.

I would completely correct my child for not recycling - I'm shocked you wouldn't. As for that shirt, it wouldn't be an option. We are part Native American. It's offensive, I also don't associate with racists.

Is reading comprehension an option? Because the point was about "correcting" other people's children.

Is writing comprehension an option? Why is recycling liberal and/or culturally sensitive? If you wrote it, you should be able to explain it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mom of two boys ages 7 and 11.

Yes, you need to lighten up. In fact, I use that expression myself. We all have a good laugh.

Girls and Boys are different. Nothing wrong with that. And BTW, this is part of teaching my boys to ADORE girls.

Your kids wouldn't be invited to play at my house. I don't want my son to ADORE girls. I want him to RESPECT them. You are teaching your kids to be disrespectful.

One day they'll have a female boss, or interview for a job with one. Then the disrespect you've taught them will be regretted.

The two are not mutually exclusive. In fact, part of adoring girls IS respecting them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I am 45 and I played competitive soccer. I beat all the boys in the Presidential Fitness thing---in every event. I played Division 1 soccer. Though--I liked make-up and fashion. I had an older brother and a sister.

AND...I'm the first one to use the 'cry like a girl', etc. I don't even think about it when I say it...or the irony that I am female. I guess growing up it was an insult to be told that but if you were a gifted athlete nobody would ever accuse of doing anything like a girl. In fact, I was told I don't 'run like a girl' and I took great pride in that growing up.

I have 5 nephews (teens and 20s) and I have two boys myself. My nephews would tell my boys 'not to be a momma's boy' if they cried over something.

Frankly, I personally HATED that television ad with the 'run like a girl', 'throw like a girl' because I think they should have used top women athletes..not girls that couldn't run. My kids and I busted out laughing at one of the girls because she had the worst running form ever.

I like being a woman. But- I don't go around looking for something to take 'offense' at constantly.

When even Jerry Seinfeld finds college campuses too liberal and politically correct---it is time America lightens the f*ck up!!

It's a shame you were or are a gifted athlete, but not very self aware or bright.

Give me a break. I have a PhD in Biochemistry so I guarantee I am brighter than you.

I also have no shame in admitting that the women's World Cup is not as exciting as the Men's. The game is so much slower. The skill and athleticism isn't the same.

I don't think voicing that in any way takes away my enjoyment of playing the sport at a level only 1% of girls in the world ever get a chance to do.

Get over yourselves, Sisters.

[Anonymous]

Unacceptable. I am a very low key mom and accept a lot (some would even say negligent probably...) but I would definitely have a talk about this one. It's very demeaning, and not funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. I am 45 and I played competitive soccer. I beat all the boys in the Presidential Fitness thing---in every event. I played Division 1 soccer. Though--I liked make-up and fashion. I had an older brother and a sister.

AND...I'm the first one to use the 'cry like a girl', etc. I don't even think about it when I say it...or the irony that I am female. I guess growing up it was an insult to be told that but if you were a gifted athlete nobody would ever accuse of doing anything like a girl. In fact, I was told I don't 'run like a girl' and I took great pride in that growing up.

I have 5 nephews (teens and 20s) and I have two boys myself. My nephews would tell my boys 'not to be a momma's boy' if they cried over something.

Frankly, I personally HATED that television ad with the 'run like a girl', 'throw like a girl' because I think they should have used top women athletes..not girls that couldn't run. My kids and I busted out laughing at one of the girls because she had the worst running form ever.

I like being a woman. But- I don't go around looking for something to take 'offense' at constantly.

When even Jerry Seinfeld finds college campuses too liberal and politically correct---it is time America lightens the f*ck up!!

It's a shame you were or are a gifted athlete, but not very self aware or bright.

Give me a break. I have a PhD in Biochemistry so I guarantee I am brighter than you.

I also have no shame in admitting that the women's World Cup is not as exciting as the Men's. The game is so much slower. The skill and athleticism isn't the same.

I don't think voicing that in any way takes away my enjoyment of playing the sport at a level only 1% of girls in the world ever get a chance to do.

Get over yourselves, Sisters.

I thought the same thing about comedians no longer going to college campuses.

People are constantly looking for a reason to make a stink.

It is such a non-issue IMO.

[Anonymous]

Nope, I have two boys ages 6 and 9 and I don't tolerate sexist put-downs, ever. If we don't teach them, who will??

[Anonymous]

What the hell? We don't use that kind of talk in our house. I don't tell my son to "man up," and I certainly don't think there's any shame if boys are sensitive and/or gay. The circular argument that we need to tell our sons to repress their feelings so they won't get picked on because society views feminine traits as negative needs to stop.

Having said that, I wouldn't overtly correct other people's children, but I would say something like "Nonsense! Girls can throw/run/fight just fine" and move on.

I am nearly positive that my boys (6 and 4) are not gay, but one of my jobs is to prepare them to be good friends to their gay classmates as well as to all the women they will encounter in their lives. This means valuing and accepting different personality traits, not just traditionally masculine ones.

[Anonymous]

The kids that say that are hearing it from their parents. Apple. Tree.

And as for those who say that it isn't meant to be derogatory, then why is it being said in a negative connotation?

Give me a break. Racists, bigots and chauvinists raise racists bigots and chauvinists unless someone steps in to show the kids that what they are seeing at home is not just.