Do not hold your advanced kid back a year and then complain he/she isn't challenged

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A rant.. I was speaking with someone who held her child back (red shirted K) because he has a March birthday. He's now is second grade and the mom is always complaining about how bored her son is in school. Well maybe if she sent her son to school on time, it wouldn't be an issue.

Signed a mom who has a son with a late August birthday who sent their child to school on time.

1) An advanced kid doesn't get held back.
2) Boredom in school doesn't signal gifted or talented behavior. Gifted and talented children do not get bored at school.

Oh hell, let's not start that again. There's a whole long thread on that already in the AAP forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A rant.. I was speaking with someone who held her child back (red shirted K) because he has a March birthday. He's now is second grade and the mom is always complaining about how bored her son is in school. Well maybe if she sent her son to school on time, it wouldn't be an issue.

Signed a mom who has a son with a late August birthday who sent their child to school on time.

1) An advanced kid doesn't get held back.
2) Boredom in school doesn't signal gifted or talented behavior. Gifted and talented children do not get bored at school.

1.) Depends on the school - there are a lot of schools where teachers will just teach to the middle and basically ignore the advanced and underperforming kids.

2.) Agree that boredom and G&T are definitely not synonymous - but it's absolutely *not* true that G&T kids won't get bored in school. ANY kid can get bored in school. And, if the coursework feels too slow or remedial to a G&T kid, and he doesn't have something else to occupy his time, that's a good reason why he *will* get bored.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Also affects the class when young summer boys can't behave, which I've seen happen much more frequently.

If a kid can't behave when s/he is in the age-appropriate grade, maybe the problem is how the class is being run. A class for five-year-olds should be able to accommodate the range of five-year-old behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Also affects the class when young summer boys can't behave, which I've seen happen much more frequently.

If a kid can't behave when s/he is in the age-appropriate grade, maybe the problem is how the class is being run. A class for five-year-olds should be able to accommodate the range of five-year-old behavior.

Kindergarten is no longer geared toward five year olds. Kindergarteners are expected to do things that developmentally nobody should expect til 6-7.

[Anonymous]

YES. There is a mother in my child's class who does the same thing. So and so is bored and not challenged. He just turned 7.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:YES. There is a mother in my child's class who does the same thing. So and so is bored and not challenged. He just turned 7.

7 in kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

One of my best high school friends and I were both held back for "social" reasons in early elementary. I think it ended up seriously alienating her from school. I did better, but my predominate memory of elementary school is being excruciatingly bored. Now I have a kid who will be in the younger quarter of the class, and because of this experience, there's no way I will hold him back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of my best high school friends and I were both held back for "social" reasons in early elementary. I think it ended up seriously alienating her from school. I did better, but my predominate memory of elementary school is being excruciatingly bored. Now I have a kid who will be in the younger quarter of the class, and because of this experience, there's no way I will hold him back.

Forgot to add that my friend and I are both probably in the "gifted" category (as defined around here -- not truly gifted!) Perfect scores on SAT sections, etc. My friend probably has the most brain power of anyone I know. The holding back was purely for social reasons. Turns out we are both just sort of misanthrope introverts, so I'm not sure holding back really did anything on that front!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Also affects the class when young summer boys can't behave, which I've seen happen much more frequently.

If a kid can't behave when s/he is in the age-appropriate grade, maybe the problem is how the class is being run. A class for five-year-olds should be able to accommodate the range of five-year-old behavior.

Kindergarten is no longer geared toward five year olds. Kindergarteners are expected to do things that developmentally nobody should expect til 6-7.

I don't think this is true. My kid's K class they were expected to learn some basic sight words by the end of the year and count to 100. That doesn't seem to crazy to me, and my child was not 100% successful in either endeavor, but the teacher assured me he is fine, and now in 2nd he's doing great. Plus, there are so many crafts and singing type games, it seemed to me a lot less strenuous than many pre-k classes. My young August birthday loved it.
I learned counting to 100 in Kindergarten, too, 39 years ago, so I don't think it's that crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Also affects the class when young summer boys can't behave, which I've seen happen much more frequently.

If a kid can't behave when s/he is in the age-appropriate grade, maybe the problem is how the class is being run. A class for five-year-olds should be able to accommodate the range of five-year-old behavior.

Kindergarten is no longer geared toward five year olds. Kindergarteners are expected to do things that developmentally nobody should expect til 6-7.

I don't think this is true. My kid's K class they were expected to learn some basic sight words by the end of the year and count to 100. That doesn't seem to crazy to me, and my child was not 100% successful in either endeavor, but the teacher assured me he is fine, and now in 2nd he's doing great. Plus, there are so many crafts and singing type games, it seemed to me a lot less strenuous than many pre-k classes. My young August birthday loved it.
I learned counting to 100 in Kindergarten, too, 39 years ago, so I don't think it's that crazy.

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Also affects the class when young summer boys can't behave, which I've seen happen much more frequently.

If a kid can't behave when s/he is in the age-appropriate grade, maybe the problem is how the class is being run. A class for five-year-olds should be able to accommodate the range of five-year-old behavior.

DD is in 4th grade, and has been in classes with several different redshirted boys over the years. Every single one of them has been among worst behaved students in her classes. Holding them back didn't make them behave any better. It just makes them seem older and cooler to the younger boys who follow their lead.

[Anonymous]

My 1st grader DS just has gotten an invitation to his classmate 8th birthday, when DS will not turn 7 until August. More than 15 months apart in age. This is just weird.

[Anonymous]

In DCPS it has an ever weirder effect. Since you basically cannot redshirt for PK3 or 4 - all the kids who are in PK are of the correct age. (4 turning 5 for PK4 for instance.) However, the influx of kids who start at K tend to skew much older as many of them have been redshirted.

You then get a ton of tall 6 turning 7 year olds all joining in K.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 1st grader DS just has gotten an invitation to his classmate 8th birthday, when DS will not turn 7 until August. More than 15 months apart in age. This is just weird.

My child was 6 yo in first grade. 8? That's crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 1st grader DS just has gotten an invitation to his classmate 8th birthday, when DS will not turn 7 until August. More than 15 months apart in age. This is just weird.

Just wait til the Bar Mitzvah invitations in 6th grade.