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It really depends on the child, not gender. My MIL and I have a good relationship. Her other son, who lived near her, basically abandoned her when she was starting to get dementia. My husband was supportive, but I am the one who choose to move her here and be her caretaker for 9 months in our home prior to getting her into a nursing home. I do all her shopping, manage her finances, visit weekly and make sure everything is kept up at the nursing home. The bigger issue is who they marry to me.
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See, this is what I mean. There is always girl bashing on these threads. Why is this okay, and not okay for someone to say, thank goodness I have a girl? I have one of each, and yeah, I am glad I have a girl. I would have been just as glad to have a boy. But I am not seeing the distinction here. |
Not the initial PP, but I am also someone who is very close to her MIL and have a good relationship with my mother. In fact, I am used to a very close-knit family so I am the one who's got DH to be a lot more present in his parents' lives than he was before. |
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Well, my MIL hates me because I 'took her son away from her.'
Same with the othe DIL. MIL only had sons. |
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I look at my MIL who had 5 boys.
To the day she died, her sons worshiped the ground that she walked on and they would do anything for her. Yet, she was not overbearing or meddlesome. They just adored her. I have one of each (both in college) and despite stereotypes, my DD was the most challenging from the womb - partier, defiant, independent, risk taker. DS is quiet, sensitive and sticker for order. But I would NOT change a thing about either of them. I am blessed to be their mother. |
| Pity is a worthless emotion. |
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I have an only child and he's a boy. I thought this thread was going to be some sort of revelation about my life. LOL. Guess not.
I love my kid. Period. I never had a preference for boy vs girl, so that made it pretty easy. |
| My mother just threw my grandmother out of her house. My uncle took her in and is caring for her. |
| I have a boy and am expecting a girl, which I'm happy with. But really - there is something to be said for every combination. I think two of the same sex would be incredible in terms of their relationship (2 boys that are best friends). I love having my boy-boys love and take care of us! |
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I have two boys. Love them dearly, and wouldn't trade it for anything.
Like a PP, I used to think that I'd want a girl. And if I had one, I'm sure I'd be thrilled with her. But as it is - watching the two boys together is SO MUCH FUN. Their personalities are completely different, and yet they can play together in this awesome way (with the occasional pillow fight thrown in for good measure). Concern over who will take care of me in my old age? Never occurred to me to worry about this. That's not why I have kids. Yes, I'd like to have their companionship as I age, but what the hell does gender have to do with that? |
I am the PP, and as a mother of a boy, I am actually happy my observations did not ring true to many of you. As I said, these were anecdotal experiences, so no need to take issue with my statement, I am already convinced I was wrong
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| I'm just happy to have two children that are happy and healthy. They each bring joys and challenges that may or may not be related to their gender. I'm fine with it all and cherish every day with them. |
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I very much wanted a daughter, because I think girls are cool. (I certainly think I am cool, LOL.) I am not a girly-girl at all, so my interest in having a girl had nothing to do with wanting any of the stereotypically girly things--quite the opposite.
I have boys instead, and that's turned out to be cool, too. And I really enjoy having two boys; I enjoy their dynamic. I'm really glad I have boys. But I still think raising a DD would have been really fun and I think a very small part of me will always be a little sad that I didn't get to have a girl, too. |
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I hit the jackpot (like all parents must think).
I Love my boys to pieces. They are 6.5 and 9 and very, very close. They rarely fight and worship one another. They make life so fun. We are extremely proud of them. The little one came in for morning cuddles and a picture he drew of the two of us together. I heart mom was all over the page. You can't convine me there's anything better. |
Same here. DH is the youngest of 3 sons. She cried when he told her he was in love with me. I wish we had a close relationship like I knows others have with their MILs. |