Husbands out there - what could your wife do differently to increase your drive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Give him a hand job and stop just before he comes. Then he will beg you. If it is not working, find someone on the side if divorce is not an option.

I found someone on the side.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sigh. Very jealous of these wives with DH's who are always ready to go. It's like pulling teeth over here. V demoralizing.

There's gotta be an underlying hormonal issue ( assuming he's not gay). Is he heavy? That leads to low T which is a huge culprit.

My H has never been very into it. I've always had a higher drive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has not initiated sex for over a year. Is it me? Is it him? I'm not perfect but not that repulsive.

Its HIM. Any normal man is going to jump at tue opportunity with a ready and willing woman. They are not picky, you don't have to be perfect by any stretch.

I don't know how you folks tolerate sexless marriages. I'd have an affair ZERO DOUBT.

Yep that's what happens. I waited ten years for my H to come around. Went through many conversations, went to counselling for months. Conclusion: it's normal, albeit the low side of normal, for a guy to want sex three or four times a month. Just sucks for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Then how come other man find me attractive with the extra 50 lb, but the dh does not?

50 pounds is not a trivial amount of weight. I am over 6 feet and was about 50 pounds overweight at one point and I was pretty fat. 50 pounds on a typical woman is probably like 80 pounds on a 6+ foot male.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My drive is perfectly fine: masturbate daily, fantasize over most soccer moms that I meet.

Oh, did you mean my drive for her?
Well she could act like she even cares how she looks, for starters lose the 40 pounds since we started dating!

so you would mastrubate, but not have sex with your wife because she has extra 40 lb?

It would depend on whether I found her attractive at that weight.

Do you want to have sex with people that you don't find attractive?

[Anonymous]

Wider thigh gap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has not initiated sex for over a year. Is it me? Is it him? I'm not perfect but not that repulsive.

Its HIM. Any normal man is going to jump at tue opportunity with a ready and willing woman. They are not picky, you don't have to be perfect by any stretch.

I don't know how you folks tolerate sexless marriages. I'd have an affair ZERO DOUBT.

100% false.

Men are much pickier than women when it comes to looks, especially weight. Just like women are pickier than men when it comes to career/money/status.

You certainly don't have to be perfect, but I can honestly say that I have never in my life been physically attracted to a woman who was more than slightly overweight. Literally never.I would never shame anyone for being heavy; I know it's very difficult lose weight, and I sympathize, but I can't help what I am attracted to.

And, to be blunt, 40-50 pounds isn't slightly overweight, unless you are Shaquille O'Neal. If the scale says that you are 40 pounds overweight, be objective and accept it. Don't demand that people be attracted to you. You can't force that on people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a DW who's interested in this question too, OP. So far, I've thrown out all my granny panties and only have matching bra and panty sets; I've stopped burping around him (never farted); I've sent him raunchy pics; and I'm letting my hair get quite long.

Something is seriously wrong with a man who can't get excited over a ready and willing wife.

My husband has two chronic illnesses and a long commute. He's over 50. I'm lucky to get it once a week.

Your DH falls into the seriously wrong category=chronic illnesses. Luckily no the seriously wrong category=gay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has not initiated sex for over a year. Is it me? Is it him? I'm not perfect but not that repulsive.

Its HIM. Any normal man is going to jump at tue opportunity with a ready and willing woman. They are not picky, you don't have to be perfect by any stretch.

I don't know how you folks tolerate sexless marriages. I'd have an affair ZERO DOUBT.

100% false.

Men are much pickier than women when it comes to looks, especially weight. Just like women are pickier than men when it comes to career/money/status.

You certainly don't have to be perfect, but I can honestly say that I have never in my life been physically attracted to a woman who was more than slightly overweight. Literally never.I would never shame anyone for being heavy; I know it's very difficult lose weight, and I sympathize, but I can't help what I am attracted to.

And, to be blunt, 40-50 pounds isn't slightly overweight, unless you are Shaquille O'Neal. If the scale says that you are 40 pounds overweight, be objective and accept it. Don't demand that people be attracted to you. You can't force that on people.

Who said she was obese? Here statement was I'm not perfect but not that repulsive. She did not state that she was obese.

However, as a man, I of course prefer a playboy playmate, but you've got to be pretty bad for me not to want to get it up. I was still screwing my wife when she was 9 months pregnant and could not wait until it was safe to resume sex, even if her body was not back to normal yet. If my wife is turned on by me, it is guaranteed that I'm going to be as hard as a rock. Many men feel this way. We are simple. Be somewhat kind to us and be ready and willing and we will be forever happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has not initiated sex for over a year. Is it me? Is it him? I'm not perfect but not that repulsive.

Its HIM. Any normal man is going to jump at tue opportunity with a ready and willing woman. They are not picky, you don't have to be perfect by any stretch.

I don't know how you folks tolerate sexless marriages. I'd have an affair ZERO DOUBT.

100% false.

Men are much pickier than women when it comes to looks, especially weight. Just like women are pickier than men when it comes to career/money/status.

You certainly don't have to be perfect, but I can honestly say that I have never in my life been physically attracted to a woman who was more than slightly overweight. Literally never.I would never shame anyone for being heavy; I know it's very difficult lose weight, and I sympathize, but I can't help what I am attracted to.

And, to be blunt, 40-50 pounds isn't slightly overweight, unless you are Shaquille O'Neal. If the scale says that you are 40 pounds overweight, be objective and accept it. Don't demand that people be attracted to you. You can't force that on people.

Who said she was obese? Here statement was I'm not perfect but not that repulsive. She did not state that she was obese.

However, as a man, I of course prefer a playboy playmate, but you've got to be pretty bad for me not to want to get it up. I was still screwing my wife when she was 9 months pregnant and could not wait until it was safe to resume sex, even if her body was not back to normal yet. If my wife is turned on by me, it is guaranteed that I'm going to be as hard as a rock. Many men feel this way. We are simple. Be somewhat kind to us and be ready and willing and we will be forever happy.

How old are you?

[Anonymous]

My main problem with overweight women is not the weight itself but that the resulting body image issues tend to make them inhibited.

BBW porn where the woman is really enjoying sex is every bit as hot as the porn where there are smaller women involved.

Enthusiasm is so, so sexy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DH has not initiated sex for over a year. Is it me? Is it him? I'm not perfect but not that repulsive.

Its HIM. Any normal man is going to jump at tue opportunity with a ready and willing woman. They are not picky, you don't have to be perfect by any stretch.

I don't know how you folks tolerate sexless marriages. I'd have an affair ZERO DOUBT.

100% false.

Men are much pickier than women when it comes to looks, especially weight. Just like women are pickier than men when it comes to career/money/status.

You certainly don't have to be perfect, but I can honestly say that I have never in my life been physically attracted to a woman who was more than slightly overweight. Literally never.I would never shame anyone for being heavy; I know it's very difficult lose weight, and I sympathize, but I can't help what I am attracted to.

And, to be blunt, 40-50 pounds isn't slightly overweight, unless you are Shaquille O'Neal. If the scale says that you are 40 pounds overweight, be objective and accept it. Don't demand that people be attracted to you. You can't force that on people.

Who said she was obese? Here statement was I'm not perfect but not that repulsive. She did not state that she was obese.

However, as a man, I of course prefer a playboy playmate, but you've got to be pretty bad for me not to want to get it up. I was still screwing my wife when she was 9 months pregnant and could not wait until it was safe to resume sex, even if her body was not back to normal yet. If my wife is turned on by me, it is guaranteed that I'm going to be as hard as a rock. Many men feel this way. We are simple. Be somewhat kind to us and be ready and willing and we will be forever happy.

How old are you?

42, with my wife for 20 years now. 3 kids and due to that her weight has gone up and down. However she has always been ready and willing and for that, after reading these boards, I'm very grateful for. I still find her so sexy, mainly because she finds me sexy as well, or at least she is good at faking it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men with low drive wives: You're ruining this thread. I don't want to hear about how your wives reject you.

OP I would like to know too! I wear lingerie, I'm thin, fun, we make out a lot... DH and I are best friends, but the sex just isn't there. And no, he's not gay.

You make out a lot but don't have sex? That is so weird. Every time my husband makes out with me he wants to do it.

Yes! We love to kiss. We're just chronically tired and are always too tired for sex.

Ridiculous. Suck it up. Do you want to go to your grave (or even into your dotage) regretting that you didn't sleep enough or that you didn't have enough sex? Sex trumps sleep in our house.

Tell that to my DH! He's the one who's tired. The only thing I'm tired about is begging for sex nightly. Our sex is pretty awesome once it happens so maybe: 1x week amazing > 5x week mediocre?

[Anonymous]

So we figured it out, op. Men will not have sex with overweight women. So it doesn't matter what color bra you are wearing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So we figured it out, op. Men will not have sex with overweight women. So it doesn't matter what color bra you are wearing.

Nice selective reading.