Emotional needs of our students

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

Because grades are not really that important or an indicator of how well a child will do in college, it indicates that a kid had wealthy parents or more resources but not his ability to learn. UVA does not want to transplant all the kids from N.VA into their school. That would create a very boring student body, they need kids from all over.

That doesn't answer the question. Kids don't get in on grades alone, yet the quotas are still set differently

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

U.Va was my safety school, and the safety school of a lot of my friends, in the late 70s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

That is a stereotype. We are "Ivy Parents" and would love it if our DC ends up at UVA.

[Anonymous]

That is a stereotype. We are "Ivy Parents" and would love it if our DC ends up at UVA.

Of course it is. Extrapolate please... You know what I am talking about. If not it plays to the stereotype that Ivy league kids memorize and regurgitate instead of learning critical thinking skills.

[Anonymous]

Could someone who is IVY on here explain to me how a Harvard Law senior could spend half of her time in Texas during her senior year and still graduate with honors?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

That is a stereotype. We are "Ivy Parents" and would love it if our DC ends up at UVA.

Yeah, but what about if they can "only" get into JMU or Tech or radford??????? that's the point

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

For whom exactly does this cause stress?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

For whom exactly does this cause stress?

Some families maybe? What's your point?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Could someone who is IVY on here explain to me how a Harvard Law senior could spend half of her time in Texas during her senior year and still graduate with honors?

There are no "seniors" at Harvard Law, just third-year students, and if she did well on her exams she could graduate with honors. A lot of law school students don't show up regularly for class, but rely on other resources to tell them what they need to know for the exams.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A spinoff from the suicide thread.

Some questions that may help start this.

Our kids are students with lots of demands. How are they handling those demands?

Who should be helping them learn to manage this for themselves and when does it start?

Is FCPS really a pressure cooker across the board or is the world our kids growing up in that much harder regardless of where they attend?

Getting rid of TJ and the message the existence of that school sends would be a good start.

While getting rid of TJ, get rid of UVA as well since you clearly do not want good educational institutions. Why stop there, get rid of all top public high schools in the area and the country as well. Happy now?

Can you explain to me why the kids at school A must have a GPA and test scores much higher than kids at school B, in order to be accepted to UVA?

What does that have to do with meeting the emotional needs of our students?

It's because the kids in these schools can't "even" get into UVA. That is the message they receive, they can't "even" get into the state school that 20 years ago was our safety school. That causes stress.

UVA was never a "safety" school. Tech or JMU, yes, but not UVA.

Yes. It was where you went when you did not get into a better school. That is a safety school.

By that definition, Yale or Cornell are safety schools if you can't get into Harvard. UVA has been a difficult school to get into for decades, always one of the top rated.

Ivy kids would be embarrasses to go to UVA. That is the problem. If you live in Nova you have to have ivy grades to get into UVA. That is a problem, that causes stress. The message that going to JMU is because you are not good enough for other schools is also a bad message that causes stress.

For whom exactly does this cause stress?

Some families maybe? What's your point?

The kids who get into and go to JMU seem happy to me. Some of their parents are upset this doesn't give them the bragging rights they were hoping for. I'm just not sure whose stress we are discussing here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher and I have been trying to figure this out this year. Something has changed. I've been in teaching for ten years and I've noticed the change on several levels. They are stressed out. Part of that stress comes from a fundamental lie they are being told: they won't be successful if they don't get into the top school. I pointed out that they could go to NOVA, save money, be in smaller classes, and then go on to the four-year schools and they'd have the same degree - and they were shocked! They are over scheduled, which leads me to another point: as a whole, they are not better students as the kids ten years ago. Of course I have very good students that are the exceptions, but most of the students in my honors level class procrastinate, make excuses, etc...There were always some students like this, but they understood that they didn't earn an A, and there was no argument. Now, they try to pressure you into grades they didn't earn, and when that doesn't work, they get their parents involved with pleas that usually involve getting in to colleges.
Where does that pressure come from? Probably society, but I think it is a parent's job to let them know that they love them unconditionally and help their kid overcome that pressure - not add to it. I had a kid tell me at the beginning of the year that he must earn A's because when he didn't get into TJ, his father didn't speak to him for a month.

We need more teachers like you, especially at Langley.
Thank you for sharing your experience and wisdom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher and I have been trying to figure this out this year. Something has changed. I've been in teaching for ten years and I've noticed the change on several levels. They are stressed out. Part of that stress comes from a fundamental lie they are being told: they won't be successful if they don't get into the top school. I pointed out that they could go to NOVA, save money, be in smaller classes, and then go on to the four-year schools and they'd have the same degree - and they were shocked! They are over scheduled, which leads me to another point: as a whole, they are not better students as the kids ten years ago. Of course I have very good students that are the exceptions, but most of the students in my honors level class procrastinate, make excuses, etc...There were always some students like this, but they understood that they didn't earn an A, and there was no argument. Now, they try to pressure you into grades they didn't earn, and when that doesn't work, they get their parents involved with pleas that usually involve getting in to colleges.
Where does that pressure come from? Probably society, but I think it is a parent's job to let them know that they love them unconditionally and help their kid overcome that pressure - not add to it. I had a kid tell me at the beginning of the year that he must earn A's because when he didn't get into TJ, his father didn't speak to him for a month.

I tuink you said it best of all the posters, yet it doesn't seem as if this is the message the posters want to hear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a teacher and I have been trying to figure this out this year. Something has changed. I've been in teaching for ten years and I've noticed the change on several levels. They are stressed out. Part of that stress comes from a fundamental lie they are being told: they won't be successful if they don't get into the top school. I pointed out that they could go to NOVA, save money, be in smaller classes, and then go on to the four-year schools and they'd have the same degree - and they were shocked! They are over scheduled, which leads me to another point: as a whole, they are not better students as the kids ten years ago. Of course I have very good students that are the exceptions, but most of the students in my honors level class procrastinate, make excuses, etc...There were always some students like this, but they understood that they didn't earn an A, and there was no argument. Now, they try to pressure you into grades they didn't earn, and when that doesn't work, they get their parents involved with pleas that usually involve getting in to colleges.
Where does that pressure come from? Probably society, but I think it is a parent's job to let them know that they love them unconditionally and help their kid overcome that pressure - not add to it. I had a kid tell me at the beginning of the year that he must earn A's because when he didn't get into TJ, his father didn't speak to him for a month.

I tell my kids this all the time. Still, it is hard for kids to say I am going to JUCO, as the kids call it. Why? I am not sending that message. I only have a certain amount of money. I told my kids 2 years of NOVA, 2 years (or 3) to graduate, and they will have money for graduate school, or a down payment for a house. The feeling is no I rather go straight to UVA.

My friend offered his daughter the balance of UVA vs her very expensive private school, she turned it down. He told her not to go into business and finance because she obviously did not have the aptitude for that.