Complaint about offer to drop meal by with new baby

[Anonymous]

Sorry for the friend not showing and even sorrier for the previous unkind posts. You are managing a lot and don't need any more grief. Good luck and I hope your dinner ended up ok. Hard way to learn lesson.

[Anonymous]

Yeah your friend is a jerk!

[Anonymous]

I agree with you, OP. I'd be super annoyed, too. It's rude to offer and not follow through.

I coordinate meal drop offs for elderly and sick people at our church and you'd be surprised how many people offer, but then forget or just plain don't bother. I hope your friend is ok and has a really, really good excuse.

[Anonymous]

Annoying, but lesson learned. This is why if I am doing food prep for a new mom, 2 things... Only very close friends, that way I know their food preferences. And only individually portioned things that can be frozen, because new moms never know when they are planning on eating what and with who. A whole tray of something can easily go to waste if the family's schedule is still all over the place.

[Anonymous]

I think it's insane that so many people are permissible of this behavior. People who are flaky are rude and do not value and respect the other person. If you say you are gong to do something, you should follow through. Your co-worker is rude and you have very right to b agitated.

[Anonymous]

I agree with you, OP.

[Anonymous]

Did you miss anything, OP, like a text or something? I offered to drop off dinner for a friend who had just moved and his new baby. Well, I asked their new address and never heard back. So dinner never got dropped off. Could something like that have happened?

[Anonymous]

I hate meal deliveries like these! They always end up being such a bother, especially for a new mom. I speak from experience; my playgroup organized a meal drop off for me after my second was born.

First, most of the moms way over-stayed their visit. We're talking a sit down meet and greet with the new baby with their toddler in tow. I ended up feeling like I was entertaining. I was!

Another mom dropped off her meal at her convenience, sometime after dark, well after dinner. She explained that she was late because her toddler was suffering from pinworms and she was up late at night making the casserole for us. I said goodbye to her as fast as I could and then her casserole went straight into the garbage.

I know it's the thought that counts, but many times, providing a meal satisfies the meal maker more than the recipient, really. They make what they want, deliver it when they want, stay as long as they want and they feel great about doing something for the mom and baby.

After this, I insisted on no meal drop offs, claiming that my family was just too picky.

I've learned that if I am delivering a meal to a family that it is needed, wanted and I make certain to be accommodating of their schedule, not mine. I offer to provide breakfast, for instance, or provide a kid friendly meal for any siblings. Nice to include paper plates, napkins, drinks, cups, so the family can truly sit down and have everything at hand.

[Anonymous]

Another real possibility---- the OP mentioned co-worker I believe. Well, if this person does not have kids or is not exposed much to children, he/she may be thinking dinner is later than the OP actually has dinner. A single person generally does not eat dinner the same time a family with young kids eats.

[Anonymous]

Will you also complain if she brings something you don't like?

Your baby is a month old, not straight home from the hospital. It's a weekend, and you have a husband home - get a grip. I get that you were planning on this but if you don't have a single other easy thing in your house that you can have tonight then you have bigger problems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate meal deliveries like these! They always end up being such a bother, especially for a new mom. I speak from experience; my playgroup organized a meal drop off for me after my second was born.

First, most of the moms way over-stayed their visit. We're talking a sit down meet and greet with the new baby with their toddler in tow. I ended up feeling like I was entertaining. I was!

Another mom dropped off her meal at her convenience, sometime after dark, well after dinner. She explained that she was late because her toddler was suffering from pinworms and she was up late at night making the casserole for us. I said goodbye to her as fast as I could and then her casserole went straight into the garbage.

I know it's the thought that counts, but many times, providing a meal satisfies the meal maker more than the recipient, really. They make what they want, deliver it when they want, stay as long as they want and they feel great about doing something for the mom and baby.

After this, I insisted on no meal drop offs, claiming that my family was just too picky.

I've learned that if I am delivering a meal to a family that it is needed, wanted and I make certain to be accommodating of their schedule, not mine. I offer to provide breakfast, for instance, or provide a kid friendly meal for any siblings. Nice to include paper plates, napkins, drinks, cups, so the family can truly sit down and have everything at hand.

Wow I know this is just a vent but this is super bitchy and is why I hate being guilted into a meal drop off (whether it be through the office or playgroup or whatever). As a PP said, unless you have unusual circumstances (single parent, etc) you can usually manage to get dinner together from the prepared section of the store if you are in a bind. What I hate is that when I have done this, the recipient usually does not look any more taxed than I am in terms of ability to cook a meal. They never live anywhere near me, so I have to make a special trip across town (and I don't drive to work) to deliver a meal? Really inefficient. One time I was going to drop off a meal for someone and they weren't planning to be home to accept it (because they were out and about all day). I was like-- so I'm supposed to schlep across town and you can't even be bothered to be home (and if you're whole family is out all day, certainly you can manage to pick up dinner).

[Anonymous]

Cut OP some slack, sleep deprived, hormonal, etc. I remember I was waiting for my ILs to arrive at a set time to take my very active 18 month old so I could hopefully get some sleep with my new baby. I was hanging on by a thread and when they were 20 minutes late I lost it and called them and said, "you guys are late". I expected relief at a certain time and when it didn't arrive I became irrationally furious. I still cannot believe I did that and hope they have forgotten.

[Anonymous]

maril332 wrote:OK...

Let's use perspective:

-she offered to do a favor for you
-she is not answer texts/calls


Have you considered the fact that maybe something isn't ok on her end? I get that you may be stressed out, but seriously, make dinner. If she happens to come put it in the fridge for tomorrow, if not forget it. You should text her to ask if everything is okay since you haven't heard from her all day.

[Anonymous]

OP, I tend to be a little on the OCD side of things, but this is what I would have done. Let me just say, I ALWAYS always have a Plan B. for everything in life. And I preach this to my children as well.

I would have touched base w/her on Saturday evening and if I didn't hear back from her by Sunday noon, I would have just assumed she wasn't coming. That would have been plenty of time for her to respond if in fact she still was coming.

For you to have put your dinner plans on hold like that was a little much considering nothing was really set in stone. I understand your anger however, but try to have a Plan B. in place next time.

[Anonymous]

I'd be mildly annoyed too unless I later found out there was some kind of emergency. Yes it's a favour but don't make others change their plans and then not follow through.