Non-Ivy chip on shoulder

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think the problem is that you are young and your world view is small. This happens to all of us. We tend to compare ourselves with those we know- our friends, our neighbors, our coworkers. If you get out of your circle and travel the country or the world or even just read a lot about how others live you will not feel this any longer. You will realize this as you get older too. Once you get past that first job and have worked for different places you realize no one cares or asks where you went to college.

This is great advice. I moved into a neighborhood where many of my neighbors are janitors and security guards. You realize that people who work hard and care for their families deserve respect regardless of whether they went to a top college or not -- or even went to college at all.

+1 I work at a non-profit and we serve lots of low-wage and even homeless people. You come to understand and appreciate all people no matter their situation. Oh, and some of the most compassionate people we have on staff are Ivy and Ivy Law. I've never ever heard one of them ever mention the name of the school they went to. Not every Ivy grad is a privileged D-bag, sometimes they are truly just great people.

-! PP you've gone to the other extreme. No one is claiming that ALL Ivies are a problem or "bad" etc. Its just a few select jerks. Please don't paint the picture that everyone is bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get a kick out of it - you think you're so smart with your Ivy degree? I went to public high school in a poor state and then got a scholarship to good (but not great) undergrad and law school and did well and now I'm in the same place you are.

You don't sound like you're over it, if you spend so much time measuring yourself against everyone else. Sometimes I think the whole Ivy thing is just as much a fabrication by the non-Ivy grads. You will be happier if you can take pride in yourself without constantly comparing yourself to everyone else.

[Anonymous]

NP here. Honestly, this is an illusion. Not taking anything away from the Ivy league colleges, they are genuinely fine institutions, but they are no longer "the best". The "best" has become a really fluid concept, and the Ivy obsession would have made more sense in the 1980's than it does today.

Today we have so many excellent public high schools - you can tell US News ran out of breath listening the top 2000 and then the "Nationally Ranked" and "Nationally Recognized" ones, and I don't even think that list covers all the Blue Ribbon high schools in America - and well-educated middle class kids gunning for the best grades and best educational experience, that it just isn't realistic to think that the Ivies are going to scoop up the best talent. Too many talented kids are graduating from high school with college aspirations.

Meanwhile, hundreds of non-Ivy colleges have found that there is a need for great education, and now you have a fleet of schools with big endowments that are chasing after the best talent every year.

The Ivies get amazing kids, but put it in perspective here - it is a big world, and there are a lot of amazing kids who have done really well and made their non-Ivy alma maters proud.

I'm a recent Boston College graduate. I work at a firm in Boston. As a BC student, I met incredibly smart kids at BC, Tufts, Wellesley, Brandeis and even BU (lol) that impressed me as much as anyone I ever met from those two schools "across the river", as they liked to refer to themselves. (Never mind that Tufts is "across the river" too.) And after spending the past 6 years in Boston, 4 as a student and 2 as a young professional, let me tell you that it really doesn't matter where you graduated from. You would be surprised how little the students here care about Harvard and MIT. Nobody is in awe of them and nobody thinks themselves inferior to those students.

[Anonymous]

Usually ivy people are less sexually attractive . So maybe you have that going for you which I would pick 100 times out of 100. If given a choice.

[Anonymous]

Dude. You are 23. In 10 years, nobody will care where you went to school. Work hard and work smart, and you will get the respect you deserve.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You know what, OP? Maybe you should go to an Ivy B-school, because then you will see that the Ivies aren't the magical places you are imagining them to be.

Seriously, though, the longer you are out of college the less it matter where you attended. You are judged far more on your accomplishments -- what you did with your degree and who you are as a person. Remember that.

+1. Anyone over 30 who cares about where someone went to college is a loser.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My high school BFF went to Columbia, I went to Big State U. We talked a lot freshman year, and then it kind of tapered off as she got subconsciously aware of her "privilege" and new world. I stayed calm and didn't let it get to me.

At graduation, I went on to a top-ten (non-Ivy) law school and now am at an awesome firm making six figures. She went straight into a small consulting firm - not even management consulting - where she earns less than 70k. She has quietly come down off her high horse and we are genuinely friendly again.

The moral of the story is that my friend learned that it does not matter. Columbia did not guarantee her Mckinsey or BCG, even though she graduated with honors. My state university did not shut the doors to the admittedly dubious honor of Biglaw in a major city. Now even really insecure people wouldn't ever say anything about my undergraduate credentials because they know they would look like idiots.

It sounds like you climbed on top of that high horse.

[Anonymous]

OP Go to an Ivy B school if you can get in. It is true -- Ivy connections last a lifetime. Lots of people on this board will tell you all schools are the same, they know a friend of a friend who did well without an Ivy -- its all the same. It is not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:About +/-10 years out of college and no one cares where you went. Other than having the networking opportunities, once you're out of school you sink or swim.

hahaha, it gets more important. They just stop talking about it with outsiders. Rude, you know.

[Anonymous]

Harvard and Princeton grads are much less likely to talk about "Ivies" as a group than Cornell or Dartmouth grads. Wonder why?

The bottom of the Ivy League offers few of the benefits being discussed here. Far better to go to a regional powerhouse. SMU will get you more in Dallas than a degree from Brown, Dartmouth or Cornell. Duke or UNC will do more for you in Charlotte. These are the big financial centers outside NY.

[Anonymous]

OP, I bet your student loan debt is much less than your Ivy friends. Sock away that extra money now and you'll be retiring at 50 while they're still slaving away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP Go to an Ivy B school if you can get in. It is true -- Ivy connections last a lifetime. Lots of people on this board will tell you all schools are the same, they know a friend of a friend who did well without an Ivy -- its all the same. It is not.

Another generalization in the opposite direction. HYP alum here who knows this not true - not just my experience but the experience of others too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Usually ivy people are less sexually attractive . So maybe you have that going for you which I would pick 100 times out of 100. If given a choice.

Too bad trolls like you don't have this choice, or you wouldn't be spending hours trying to get attention from strangers on the interwebs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Harvard and Princeton grads are much less likely to talk about "Ivies" as a group than Cornell or Dartmouth grads. Wonder why?

The bottom of the Ivy League offers few of the benefits being discussed here. Far better to go to a regional powerhouse. SMU will get you more in Dallas than a degree from Brown, Dartmouth or Cornell. Duke or UNC will do more for you in Charlotte. These are the big financial centers outside NY.

More in Dallas? Uh, okay, if Dallas is the dream.

[Anonymous]

I think you should not care. Be happy with yourself and proud of who you are. Don't give a damn about stuff that doesn't matter. You are making that stuff matter. Find more worthwhile things to care about.