Would you allow your 14 y.o. daughter to ride Metro Bus alone?

[Anonymous]

No way, I would not let my DD ride the bus alone. IMO, fourteen is too young. Guys looking for a victim will typically go after someone who looks timid or young.

I used to metro from WFC to King St. and on a regular intervals, there was always some incident... like a drunk guy taking the seat next to you on an empty train, unemployed guys just riding around looking for trouble, etc. I doubt that a fourteen y.o. is old enough to deal with that... and she should NOT have to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jesus, of course. She's 14, not 4.

I know! Ha ha ha ha... Where's the "urban" in DCUM? The pearl-clutching over routine urban activities is kinda odd.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for posting your question as we'll be facing a similar issue (in another part of Fairfax County) in another year.

Have you checked the FCPS bus route map to see if you may have an opportunity to apply for an exception to ride?

[Anonymous]

Lee and Graham is hardly the 'hood. She walks home from the school bus that drops on Graham now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dad, I wouldn't want to stand at the intersection of lee and graham myself. But I took a public bus in hs and always had the creepy guy sit right next to me and stare and he always made sure his led was right up against my leg (while wearing a uniform skirt of course). I lived to tell about it, obviously. But I'm curious was your daughter thinks--that's very important. IMO.

PP, when you told your parents about that behavior the first time that happened, what advice did they give you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Jesus, of course. She's 14, not 4.

I know! Ha ha ha ha... Where's the "urban" in DCUM? The pearl-clutching over routine urban activities is kinda odd.

Well, Fairfax Cty. isn't urban, after all.

My 12 year-old rides public transport in the District, but then again, people of all walks use public transport in the District areas she's passing through all day long. I might not be so keen to have her do it outside of rush hour in the 'burbs because there bus is not popular among people who have choices... and I expect this would result in near-empty afternoon buses with people who make her less comfortable. Not to mention that the stops would not be in pedestrian-heavy areas, so no "eyes on the street" to enforce public safety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dad, I wouldn't want to stand at the intersection of lee and graham myself. But I took a public bus in hs and always had the creepy guy sit right next to me and stare and he always made sure his led was right up against my leg (while wearing a uniform skirt of course). I lived to tell about it, obviously. But I'm curious was your daughter thinks--that's very important. IMO.

PP, when you told your parents about that behavior the first time that happened, what advice did they give you?

We didn't talk about such things. It was a different era.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No way, I would not let my DD ride the bus alone. IMO, fourteen is too young. Guys looking for a victim will typically go after someone who looks timid or young.

I used to metro from WFC to King St. and on a regular intervals, there was always some incident... like a drunk guy taking the seat next to you on an empty train, unemployed guys just riding around looking for trouble, etc. I doubt that a fourteen y.o. is old enough to deal with that... and she should NOT have to.

Good grief, such idiot alarmists on this board. Sit near the driver. Kids need to learn how to be independent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dad, I wouldn't want to stand at the intersection of lee and graham myself. But I took a public bus in hs and always had the creepy guy sit right next to me and stare and he always made sure his led was right up against my leg (while wearing a uniform skirt of course). I lived to tell about it, obviously. But I'm curious was your daughter thinks--that's very important. IMO.

PP, when you told your parents about that behavior the first time that happened, what advice did they give you?

We didn't talk about such things. It was a different era.

Yep. I didn't tell my parents because a) see previous comment about girls not understanding that harassment isn't their fault and b) they had enough logistical problems and there really wasn't an option.

I'm not kidding, though. It was almost every day, and some of it was pretty hair-raising. If it happened to me now, I'd press charges.

[Anonymous]

My 10 y.o. DD rides by herself in Montgomery County. Never any issues and it has given her a lot of confidence. To the people worried about harassment, I have ridden the short route with her to school enough times to know it is unlikely to be an issue on that bus. If it was a longer bus ride, through rougher areas of DC, and at different hours, I would wait a few years.

On the other hand, I rode alone when I was 10 and encountered some drunks and perverts. And while I do wish that my parents had taught me to be more assertive, and that more of these guys, especially those who target underage kids, go to jail and psych treatment, I also would not want to raise the kind of kid to whom some idiot getting fresh or exposing himself is this huge traumatic event. Life is full of unpleasant things, and rather than try to shelter my kid from all of them, I would want her to learn to handle them by the time she is grown.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't worry as much about the actual bus ride but once she gets off and is walking home to an empty house in a largely deserted suburban neighborhood because everyone is at work. All it takes is that one creepy guy on the bus to figure out her route, get off at the same stop and follow her home. I would worry way less about this in DC where there are plenty of people out and about all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 10 y.o. DD rides by herself in Montgomery County. Never any issues and it has given her a lot of confidence. To the people worried about harassment, I have ridden the short route with her to school enough times to know it is unlikely to be an issue on that bus. If it was a longer bus ride, through rougher areas of DC, and at different hours, I would wait a few years.

On the other hand, I rode alone when I was 10 and encountered some drunks and perverts. And while I do wish that my parents had taught me to be more assertive, and that more of these guys, especially those who target underage kids, go to jail and psych treatment, I also would not want to raise the kind of kid to whom some idiot getting fresh or exposing himself is this huge traumatic event. Life is full of unpleasant things, and rather than try to shelter my kid from all of them, I would want her to learn to handle them by the time she is grown.

I was thinking more of the guy who stuck his finger in my vagina, but get down with your bad self.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My 10 y.o. DD rides by herself in Montgomery County. Never any issues and it has given her a lot of confidence. To the people worried about harassment, I have ridden the short route with her to school enough times to know it is unlikely to be an issue on that bus. If it was a longer bus ride, through rougher areas of DC, and at different hours, I would wait a few years.

On the other hand, I rode alone when I was 10 and encountered some drunks and perverts. And while I do wish that my parents had taught me to be more assertive, and that more of these guys, especially those who target underage kids, go to jail and psych treatment, I also would not want to raise the kind of kid to whom some idiot getting fresh or exposing himself is this huge traumatic event. Life is full of unpleasant things, and rather than try to shelter my kid from all of them, I would want her to learn to handle them by the time she is grown.

I was thinking more of the guy who stuck his finger in my vagina, but get down with your bad self.

This kind of crap was going on and you didn't feel you could tell your parents. Wow, they sucked!

[Anonymous]

NP here. Of course I would. Especially in Fairfax County. 14 is just 4 years from college. If she is going to learn how to cope with the dangers of the world, it needs to begin now when she still returns home every night. 14 is plenty old to be able to navigate moving seats away from a creepy person, speaking in a loud voice to deter inappropriate behavior, and sitting up close to the driver (and telling the driver why).

[Anonymous]

To OP dad: reasonable minds can differ on this. I would lean toward its being okay, especially if she is with a friend. However, the fact that you just posted on a public forum where to find a teen girl alone, makes me think that your threat assessors may not be fully thought through. I don't mean this as an ad hominem attack, but as cautious advice. I suggest you contact Jeff and ask him to take down those identifying posts.