Please tell me I'm being ridiculous....MIL issue

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - I was trying to figure out what to do with regards to reaching out to the bride. DH says to let it go because if it gets back to his aunts that I did it, their nastiness will be coming for me next. And since we are TTC, I think he's worried what will happen. I don't think he's aware that I have no intention of ever letting them attend any event for me.

Does anyone have any good suggestions? I was thinking of sending a message on FB just reiterating that I had a great time, apologizing for their behavior, and saying DH and I would like to take them out for dinner sometime since we will not be able to attend their wedding. Is this ok? should I do a handwritten note instead?

DH is right to a degree. I think you would want to say something verbally, when you can be more subtle. At dinner would be a perfect time - and you can suss out how she read the Aunts. If she didn't notice their nastiness at all, you don't want to stir anything up.

[Anonymous]

21:32, excellent point. I think I'll extend the invitation for dinner and take it from there. I really hope the aunts don't attend the wedding...I can't imagine what it would be like to be heckled at my own wedding. I have to say, thank goodness MIL is not like this at all. I was annoyed by her behavior regarding this event, but that has been my first annoyance with her in years.
SIL, on the other hand, is currently planning a destination wedding/bridal shower to avoid them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be a big girl and go. You will come off smelling like a rose. Just do it.

I agree. Be the bigger person and go.

[Anonymous]

Lol it cracks me up how people don't read through threads. She already went! Now I see hold old threads get dredged up.

[Anonymous]

Go. Don't go. Who cares? It's not your family. Why care more than dh cares?

[Anonymous]

Already went but thank you!

[Anonymous]

OP, your plan to take them out to dinner sounds wise. Be kind. If the subject of the awful aunts/her MIL comes up, be supportive of the bride. It hurts something fierce to face rejection from your husband's family.

You said DH is worried because you're TTC? What do the aunts have to do with this? I think I would keep them out of your lives as much as humanly possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:21:13...I wish I was a troll. SIL had an unplanned baby in college. At her baby shower, those two aunts gave her a dozen boxes of condoms as her present with a card that said apparently she needs those more than she needs a gift. Poor girl started crying.

Some people are just like that. DH described them perfectly. They grew up in the same town where they live now. Their only friends are each other. Anyone who appears better off than them or is more worldly than them is hazed and treated horribly. One of the aunt's sons married an absolutely gorgeous girl from LA with two masters, a high 6 figure job, and is all around a great person. I would be thrilled if I had a son who married someone like her. Groom's mom walked out in the middle of the reception and got on a cruise the next day.

I was one of the first posters to say "go ahead and go, maybe you'll help family peace, etc.". Well, I'd like to take back my advice (I know, I know, you went, too late) because you left out some important information...

Your DH's family is trash. I would steer clear.