People registering for insanely expensive wedding gifts

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My most recent friend to get married literally had nothing on any of her three registries that was below $200.

So we bought her a $75 vase and included the gift receipt. I am sure she returned it but whatevs.

ITA OP. My cousin did the same thing, registered for almost all items >150 (dining ware was that expensive too). I didnt even get a thank you note from them. The kicker is they are blue collar workers so it made even less sense. I checked ater the wedding and most item were still not bought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know brides who come from families that expect registries. Nice registries. Giving nice gifts is important to those families. So what?

Agree. I attended the wedding of a grad school friend who came from a moneyed old Richmond family. She registered for Tiffany china. 12 place settings. A single dinner plate (plate only, nothing else) was about $150. Guess what? She got almost all of her china registry fulfilled.

OP here. I know the couple really well. Both sides. They are not from these kinds of families. That is in part why I think it is strange. I am buying a gift that costs about $150 and that will be the end of it, but I was shocked at the crazy coffee pot.

Look, everyone always has something like this on their registry. Sometimes it's a pie in the sky, wouldn't it be amazing if someone actually bought this gift, and sometimes it's something they want to buy themselves with the 10% discount. We had a couple of those - our kitchen aid mixer, our vacuum, and a really nice piece of furniture. I hope my friends weren't as judgmental about it as you are.

[Anonymous]

OP, I'd be shocked, too. I think the discount is a good explanation. Or maybe it's an inside joke for them. My sister's fiancé put a giant-screen tv on their registry as a joke.

[Anonymous]

I think it's tacky sometimes. Frankly, if you are a wealthy person who has wealthy family and friends, then it's expected. If you and your fiance are young and working class, registering for outrageously expensive things, knowing full well your friends and family can't afford those things, it's beyond tacky. I'm from a VERY working/lower middle class background and I think (hope) I registered appropriately. It would have been laughable to my friends to even think I would have these extravagant things in my very modest house. But that's just my opinion.

[Anonymous]

My husband thought the little scanner gun that you get when you register was like a videogame, so when we got home and I actually went through what we registered for, there was some weird shit on there. I left some of it on because it made me laugh. I figured if someone was dying to buy a $400 ice cream maker (wtf?) then I'd happily take it.

[Anonymous]

If the registry is filled with ONLY $700 items, that's pretty rude. But if there's a wide range of things, and a few really expensive items, no big deal. The most likely explanations are a joke, or the discount, or simply filling the set.

And to the PP who said rookie mistake - too true. Many is the day I regret the 12-place crystal setting I registered for (and received). The glasses look nice, but they are completely non-functional as wine glasses. Sadly, the resale market for used crystal is not robust.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband thought the little scanner gun that you get when you register was like a videogame, so when we got home and I actually went through what we registered for, there was some weird shit on there. I left some of it on because it made me laugh. I figured if someone was dying to buy a $400 ice cream maker (wtf?) then I'd happily take it.

How old is he????

[Anonymous]

My husband's brother (my BIL) and his fiance registered for things like a dining table from Pottery Barn and a sofa and other furniture costing from $1000 - $3000. I thought it was completely out of line. BIL owned his own home (he was 40 at the time) and the fiance was 28 and had lived on her own for a little while.

When DH and I got married, we just asked for a pot/pan/pizza stone/knife set. The kinds of things you get at Bed Bath and Beyond. The most expensive was probably the down comforter (around $300). We didn't do the china sets. We were ADULTS.

If two young kids (early 20's) have nothing, then I suppose they could ask for a dining table from Target or Ikea. But for adults to put expensive furniture on their list is kind of over-reaching to me.

[Anonymous]

Maybe they are from NY. $700 is not an outrageous gift in NY.

[Anonymous]

My husband's brother (my BIL) and his fiance registered for things like a dining table from Pottery Barn and a sofa and other furniture costing from $1000 - $3000. I thought it was completely out of line. BIL owned his own home (he was 40 at the time) and the fiance was 28 and had lived on her own for a little while.

When DH and I got married, we just asked for a pot/pan/pizza stone/knife set. The kinds of things you get at Bed Bath and Beyond. The most expensive was probably the down comforter (around $300). We didn't do the china sets. We were ADULTS.

If two young kids (early 20's) have nothing, then I suppose they could ask for a dining table from Target or Ikea. But for adults to put expensive furniture on their list is kind of over-reaching to me.

[Anonymous]

Sorry for the double post -- it looked like it hadn't shown up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is it obnoxious when people register for really expensive things? Like a $700 coffee pot. Not exaggerating here. College friends, age 29 and 30. They could not buy a gift that expensive for anyone else so I think it is somewhat vulgar to register for something that expensive. From what I know of their families, they are not so rich that crazy expensive wedding gifts would be the norm.

I guess someone could say it was vulgar for me to register for a $350 stand mixer, but everyone registers for those. A $700 china coffee pot seems a bit much.

wow!

And I thought it was tack of a friend to register for a $100 thong bikini for their destination wedding. Material itself probably cost $5 b/c there was so little of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe they are from NY. $700 is not an outrageous gift in NY.

by whose standards?

I have friends in the city with good jobs who would NEVER ask for anything in that amount.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry to be a naysayer here, but I got married in NYC and $700 IS outrageously expensive. June wedding four years ago. You don't expect people to spend that on your wedding gift. If your extremely rich, extremely close relative wants to spend that on you, he or she will find a way to do it without you flaunting hugely expensive gifts all over a registry. You really want a $700 coffee pot? You make a mental note of it and after your wedding you go buy it yourself with whatever cash gifts you receive. Anything else is horrifically tacky. DH and I did not live together before we were married and had nothing. We registered for a very nice everyday set of china/dishes (much more expensive than anything we could ever afford ourselves but at about $125 a dinner plate, it allowed for a large range of options in the set). We also registered for crystal and flatware. Anyone who wanted to buy anything else could go off the registry. No $700 gifts asked for or needed, thank you. We were just so happy people wanted to be with us.

$125 for an "everyday" plate??

[Anonymous]

My husband and I registered (9 years ago) for a range of items. Some things like the really nice cookware set for ($500) we didnt expect to get, we just wanted to get the discount on it & buy it ourselves after the wedding. I was shocked when my co-workers gave us the set as a wedding gift. I think there are alot of couples register for things because stores give big discounts on the things that are left on the list after the wedding.