Would you press charges against a 7th grader.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not sure what “pressing charges” means but I would pursue every avenue that the school provides to resolve the situation. If the school administration decides to get the police involved, that would be on them. Assuming that this boy did it, return of the device and suspension/detention would be enough for me. At DS’s MCPS MS, they have security cameras in every hallway so it would be easy to catch a locker breaker.

And for all those criticizing the MS kid having an iPod, I wonder if you really are in tune with the MS environment. At my DS’s MS, most of the kids in his grade have iPods and cellphones and they are allowed to use iPods before and after school and at lunch. My DS has DH’s hand me down iPod Touch. I teach my kids not to flaunt anything they have or be careless with their possessions, but it still does not give anyone the right to steal their things. I am just not a “blame the victim” type person when it comes to intentional acts.

My MSer doesn't own an iPod, and he does just fine socially. We're not all lemmings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure what “pressing charges” means but I would pursue every avenue that the school provides to resolve the situation. If the school administration decides to get the police involved, that would be on them. Assuming that this boy did it, return of the device and suspension/detention would be enough for me. At DS’s MCPS MS, they have security cameras in every hallway so it would be easy to catch a locker breaker.

And for all those criticizing the MS kid having an iPod, I wonder if you really are in tune with the MS environment. At my DS’s MS, most of the kids in his grade have iPods and cellphones and they are allowed to use iPods before and after school and at lunch. My DS has DH’s hand me down iPod Touch. I teach my kids not to flaunt anything they have or be careless with their possessions, but it still does not give anyone the right to steal their things. I am just not a “blame the victim” type person when it comes to intentional acts.

My MSer doesn't own an iPod, and he does just fine socially. We're not all lemmings.

Well, that is your choice Superparent!!!! Mine does and he does fine socially also! So what??? It still does not give someone the right to steal his stuff. Damn!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. New information has emerged....Gawwwd, I love FB!!!

DS logged onto FB and started chatting with some friends. We already suspected a certain boy and it was confirmed by a FB friend. This kid was spotted with 3 ipods on the bus yesterday because it was apparently "bring your ipod to art" day. Seriously, why would a school promote bringing an ipod to school?...that is a recipe for theft.

I would seriously hate you as my mother. You seem like the type to attack a child over any and everything and then as your child, get teased and picked on at school for having the crazy mother.

OK...if your kid's $300 itouch was stolen and was crushed, wouldn't you do everything you could to find out what happened and who did it? Or are you the type to take it in the ass silently?

Why does a 12 13 or 14 year old own a $300 iTouch?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. New information has emerged....Gawwwd, I love FB!!!

DS logged onto FB and started chatting with some friends. We already suspected a certain boy and it was confirmed by a FB friend. This kid was spotted with 3 ipods on the bus yesterday because it was apparently "bring your ipod to art" day. Seriously, why would a school promote bringing an ipod to school?...that is a recipe for theft.

I would seriously hate you as my mother. You seem like the type to attack a child over any and everything and then as your child, get teased and picked on at school for having the crazy mother.

Thanx for your vote of confidence here. Actually, my son loves the fact that we were "sleuthing" together to figure this out. And I think we did quite well together on FB.

Is your son 13? I sure hope so, since he shouldn't have an account if he's younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. New information has emerged....Gawwwd, I love FB!!!

DS logged onto FB and started chatting with some friends. We already suspected a certain boy and it was confirmed by a FB friend. This kid was spotted with 3 ipods on the bus yesterday because it was apparently "bring your ipod to art" day. Seriously, why would a school promote bringing an ipod to school?...that is a recipe for theft.

I would seriously hate you as my mother. You seem like the type to attack a child over any and everything and then as your child, get teased and picked on at school for having the crazy mother.

OK...if your kid's $300 itouch was stolen and was crushed, wouldn't you do everything you could to find out what happened and who did it? Or are you the type to take it in the ass silently?

Why does a 12 13 or 14 year old own a $300 iTouch?

Maybe because they really want one and ask all the extended family members to pitch in on his 12th birthday gift. How old are your children? If they are little, you will eventually end up getting them a leapster. If they are 7-9, you'll probably get them a DSi system, and guess what....they all cost about the same when you add in all the games you have to buy in order to even PLAY with the Leapster or DSi. My DS LOVES his itouch. He listens to music, he watches videos in the car, so we don't have to bring dvds. He takes pictures and videos. It's a fun gadgety toy that preteens and teens LOVE.

When your kids reach that age, they'll be asking for one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. New information has emerged....Gawwwd, I love FB!!!

DS logged onto FB and started chatting with some friends. We already suspected a certain boy and it was confirmed by a FB friend. This kid was spotted with 3 ipods on the bus yesterday because it was apparently "bring your ipod to art" day. Seriously, why would a school promote bringing an ipod to school?...that is a recipe for theft.

I would seriously hate you as my mother. You seem like the type to attack a child over any and everything and then as your child, get teased and picked on at school for having the crazy mother.

Thanx for your vote of confidence here. Actually, my son loves the fact that we were "sleuthing" together to figure this out. And I think we did quite well together on FB.

Is your son 13? I sure hope so, since he shouldn't have an account if he's younger.

99% of MSers are on FB once they hit 6th grade. Are you going to turn them all in?

[Anonymous]

A pp here. That is the one thing I dislike about DCUM. OP relays that a kid broke into DS’s locked locker, unzipped his backpack and stole his iPod. And folks jump on her for allowing her son to have an iPod, implying that the theft is somehow her fault. It kills me that folks act like they are parenting on a higher plane and that the rest of us are cave people for allowing our kids to take advantage of new technology. Well, one of my kids got her jacket stolen from her locker at her private HS. Well, I guess it is my fault for allowing her to wear a jacket to school. LOL!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. New information has emerged....Gawwwd, I love FB!!!

DS logged onto FB and started chatting with some friends. We already suspected a certain boy and it was confirmed by a FB friend. This kid was spotted with 3 ipods on the bus yesterday because it was apparently "bring your ipod to art" day. Seriously, why would a school promote bringing an ipod to school?...that is a recipe for theft.

I would seriously hate you as my mother. You seem like the type to attack a child over any and everything and then as your child, get teased and picked on at school for having the crazy mother.

Thanx for your vote of confidence here. Actually, my son loves the fact that we were "sleuthing" together to figure this out. And I think we did quite well together on FB.

Is your son 13? I sure hope so, since he shouldn't have an account if he's younger.

I know parents like you and kids like yours. Your kid is the one who has the FB acoount that you do not know about. He uses it in the school library and at his friend's house. LOL!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure what “pressing charges” means but I would pursue every avenue that the school provides to resolve the situation. If the school administration decides to get the police involved, that would be on them. Assuming that this boy did it, return of the device and suspension/detention would be enough for me. At DS’s MCPS MS, they have security cameras in every hallway so it would be easy to catch a locker breaker.

And for all those criticizing the MS kid having an iPod, I wonder if you really are in tune with the MS environment. At my DS’s MS, most of the kids in his grade have iPods and cellphones and they are allowed to use iPods before and after school and at lunch. My DS has DH’s hand me down iPod Touch. I teach my kids not to flaunt anything they have or be careless with their possessions, but it still does not give anyone the right to steal their things. I am just not a “blame the victim” type person when it comes to intentional acts.

My MSer doesn't own an iPod, and he does just fine socially. We're not all lemmings.

It was probably your kid who took it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A pp here. That is the one thing I dislike about DCUM. OP relays that a kid broke into DS’s locked locker, unzipped his backpack and stole his iPod. And folks jump on her for allowing her son to have an iPod, implying that the theft is somehow her fault. It kills me that folks act like they are parenting on a higher plane and that the rest of us are cave people for allowing our kids to take advantage of new technology. Well, one of my kids got her jacket stolen from her locker at her private HS. Well, I guess it is my fault for allowing her to wear a jacket to school. LOL!!

I agree.

[Anonymous]

I honestly think that you wouldnt even have this issue had you not allowed him to bring his ipod to school in the first place. My kids are not allowed to being them to school for that very reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A pp here. That is the one thing I dislike about DCUM. OP relays that a kid broke into DS’s locked locker, unzipped his backpack and stole his iPod. And folks jump on her for allowing her son to have an iPod, implying that the theft is somehow her fault. It kills me that folks act like they are parenting on a higher plane and that the rest of us are cave people for allowing our kids to take advantage of new technology. Well, one of my kids got her jacket stolen from her locker at her private HS. Well, I guess it is my fault for allowing her to wear a jacket to school. LOL!!

I disagree that this is what is happening here. Yes, no one should have stolen anything. But the OP was mainly on here to ask whether turning a 7th grader over to the police is an appropriate response to a iTouch theft. I think the posters highlighting the fact of a 12-13 year old sporting a $300 piece of electronics is in relation to the OP's poor judgment on wanting to press charges. There is no live debate among academics that the frontal cortex of a child is different than that of an adult's - which is precisely why we don't charge children as adults, generally. So, the OP's desire to treat this as a crime before recognizing this as a learning moment is pretty troubling, especially coming from a parent. I think that is what the posters are zeroing in on, rather than "blaming the victim."

By the way, imagine if the shoes were on different feet. If it were OP's child who had misbehaved, I imagine she would be going on and on about how this was something that could have been handled within the school system, and that the other parent overreacted by involving the police.

Really, OP - breathe a little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A pp here. That is the one thing I dislike about DCUM. OP relays that a kid broke into DS’s locked locker, unzipped his backpack and stole his iPod. And folks jump on her for allowing her son to have an iPod, implying that the theft is somehow her fault. It kills me that folks act like they are parenting on a higher plane and that the rest of us are cave people for allowing our kids to take advantage of new technology. Well, one of my kids got her jacket stolen from her locker at her private HS. Well, I guess it is my fault for allowing her to wear a jacket to school. LOL!!

Why is it at all relevant that your daughter goes to a private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A pp here. That is the one thing I dislike about DCUM. OP relays that a kid broke into DS’s locked locker, unzipped his backpack and stole his iPod. And folks jump on her for allowing her son to have an iPod, implying that the theft is somehow her fault. It kills me that folks act like they are parenting on a higher plane and that the rest of us are cave people for allowing our kids to take advantage of new technology. Well, one of my kids got her jacket stolen from her locker at her private HS. Well, I guess it is my fault for allowing her to wear a jacket to school. LOL!!

I disagree that this is what is happening here. Yes, no one should have stolen anything. But the OP was mainly on here to ask whether turning a 7th grader over to the police is an appropriate response to a iTouch theft. I think the posters highlighting the fact of a 12-13 year old sporting a $300 piece of electronics is in relation to the OP's poor judgment on wanting to press charges. There is no live debate among academics that the frontal cortex of a child is different than that of an adult's - which is precisely why we don't charge children as adults, generally. So, the OP's desire to treat this as a crime before recognizing this as a learning moment is pretty troubling, especially coming from a parent. I think that is what the posters are zeroing in on, rather than "blaming the victim."

By the way, imagine if the shoes were on different feet. If it were OP's child who had misbehaved, I imagine she would be going on and on about how this was something that could have been handled within the school system, and that the other parent overreacted by involving the police.

Really, OP - breathe a little.

You might want to get used to the fact that I'm not the only parent that allows her child to go to school with an ipod. DS has a long bus ride and MANY of the kids on his bus are plugged into a device to entertain them. I never said that I WANTED to prosecute this kid. I acknowledged that 12 year-olds are boneheads and make stupid decisions. And I was asking what others would do. But, do you really think that a kid that breaks into 4 kids lockers to steal their ipods is just a case of "bad judgment" and deserves only a teaching moment? Perhaps I should invite this kid over to rape and pillage my DD next so he can get the full range of his entitlements?

If the shoes were on the other feet, and I didn't KNOW my DS was doing this, I hope to GOD he would get caught and suffer the natural consequences of his actions before turning 18, where he has zero excuses anymore. Failing to hold a 12YO accountable for his actions (whether it be expulsion or a trip to Juvie) is ridiculous....it says to that child that there are no consequences for his actions. It says that there is no justice for victims, and yes, even kids who bring $300 items to school, regardless of your feelings toward it, are the victims here. If it were my child, I'd want someone to scare the living shit out of him for what he did and put the fear of God into him to set him straight. If the parents aren't doing their job here, then the system takes over and natural societal consequences ensue. What we are watching here is a criminal in training....a future scam artist that needs to be handled in whatever manner...frankly I don't give a damn how they handle it at this point because there are so many missing ipods at this point, I'm sure one of the other parents will call the police.

Do I feel sorry for the kid? Hell yes. I can only assume that his parents are pieces of work. But that does NOT entitle him to steal from anyone. Girls bring their expensive jewelry to school and their wear designer clothing and jackets. My kids don't wear expensive shoes or clothes, but they DO have itouches that they cherish and are very careful with. I do NOT hold my son accountable for the theft of his itouch as he did exactly as he was taught to do....to keep it locked away in his locker in his backpack.

Final thought here. You don't have kids in middle school yet or you wouldn't be judging ME as a parent so harshly. Then again, DC is a great place for harboring criminals...they run rampant on Capital Hill and the White House.

[Anonymous]

I would lean towards pressing changes, especially because this boy appears to have stolen at least three or four expensive things from multiple students. Talk to the school about pressing charges with the police to see if it would be worth it. Depending on your jurisdiction, the thief may get needed services (that he won't get if he's merely expelled) to try to help him straighten out before he does anything worse. He's unlikely to be locked up, and a juvenile arrest record is sealed when he turns 18. I'm guessing the boy's parents haven't been able to handle him or he probably wouldn't have stolen a bunch of expensive stuff and they probably won't be sufficient to keep him out of trouble after this incident--another reason to go to the police. The school may not want you pressing charges out of fear of making them look bad, but they may have legitimate arguements against it.