Being bullied by the new boss at work. How do you cope?

[Anonymous]

I am sorry but how is working a full day considered bullying? Cry all you want about not having the same flexibility you had with the old boss but it's not fair to assume the new boss is a bully. If you have a special schedule because your mothering duties get in the way, you had better believe that it's effect other employees, despite what you might think. It's unfair to make other say you can only work until 4pm because you have kids. Lots of people have kids and they stay in the office for the entire work day. Those who cut special deals are often resented but the others who aren't afforded such luxuries.

Keep the job, don't keep the job, but understand your special hours do effect other people.

[Anonymous]

Personally, I don't see why you deserve the "flex time" more than a single/childless person does. If you can't balance what is defined as a full workload, then you can't handle the job. Sorry if that sounds harsh but I can see them giving you a break short term, but you should not expect special privileges permanently!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry, but what you're describing is not bullying.

Further, it doesn't sound like she is resentful of your flexibility, or that her being single or without children has anything to do with your situation.

So, dial back the drama.

You had a perk. Your new boss, for whatever reason, decided to curb that perk. Apparently, she can. Instead of putting on the victim cape, try making a depersonalized case for why the former flexibility is worth it to your employer. Cite your successes. Leave out the part where they should allow you flex time because it is good for you or your kids. If you are a valuable employee, and you bring it, she should give you an audience. Otherwise, try HR.

Good luck.

"Dial back the drama?" You sound like a creep. I hope I never have to work with or for you.

[Anonymous]

It appears that I'm going to be the only one on your bosses side entirely. I don't give my employees flexibility like you had because that hour you "work from home" you stated you are actually driving your kids around. How does that benefit the company or the other employees who need you to be available during the work day? Work is work; it is inherently life limiting. You're no longer a 20 something working your college job. If you don't want to act like an adult and go to work like one, quit and save them the unemployment. You know there's a line out the door for every job at this point. Your kids can ride a bus like millions of others have done successfully for the last 50 years.

[Anonymous]

Haven't read all the answers, but there is no way around the fact that flex schedules are allowed at a company's discretion. If your boss for whatever reason doesn't like them, you have to either deal with it and adjust or find a new job that allows flex schedules.

Some supervisors are like that. I've been lucky enough to work for really family-friendly bosses that have allowed a whole host of flexible work schedules. There are people in my same company, in my same department, but with a different team leader, who all work 50-60 hours a week and bitch and moan and complain to high heaven about "slackers" who get every other Friday off, etc. That team is run by a single unmarried guy with no family in the area, and his job is is his life.

The funny part is that 70% of the people on my team work some sort of flex schedule arrangement, and our team is actually more productive than his team! We rank higher on every single stat used to measure productivity - other than hours worked. That is why the more senior managers are just fine with our flex schedules.

But . . . . all that said . . . if my boss left tomorrow and we got in a new person who had the same inherent hate towards flex schedules, I suspect senior management would support that person and flex would be history.

Personally, I'd be miserable in your shoes and I'd look for something more family friendly. But . . . just remember how temporary these perks can be and even if you find a new job that offers it, nothing guarantees it over the long term.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It appears that I'm going to be the only one on your bosses side entirely. I don't give my employees flexibility like you had because that hour you "work from home" you stated you are actually driving your kids around. How does that benefit the company or the other employees who need you to be available during the work day? Work is work; it is inherently life limiting. You're no longer a 20 something working your college job. If you don't want to act like an adult and go to work like one, quit and save them the unemployment. You know there's a line out the door for every job at this point. Your kids can ride a bus like millions of others have done successfully for the last 50 years.

Are you my old boss? You sound like a creep too. Stay away from me at my job and everyone else here. We all value our flexibility and are happier and productive with it. I feel sorry for your children.

[Anonymous]

New poster here. I want to respond to those coming down so hard on flex time.
Presumably, we are paid for the hours we work. So if someone in your group is on the books for less hours than you, they should be compesated accordingly.

When I decreased my schedule by 40%, my pay took the hit.... then again, my childless female boss recently decided that wasn't working and I have returned to full-time. However, she did not increase my workload. So now I sit at a job, bored 3/5 of the week, and my requests for more work are regularly ignored. Boredom is not good for company morale (or the budget).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:New poster here. I want to respond to those coming down so hard on flex time.
Presumably, we are paid for the hours we work. So if someone in your group is on the books for less hours than you, they should be compesated accordingly.

Agreed - so then what do co-workers care if their situation is different?
Worry about yourself, not your colleagues.

[Anonymous]

HR here. Supervisors need to focus on productivity and results. I don't care what hours you keep, as long as your job is done, and done well.

If we are interested in capitalizing on the strengths that women, mothers, and parents can bring to our workplaces, we need to accept that flexibility is an ever increasing tool for maintaining a loyal and productive workforce.

If you don't want OP and her flexible schedule, an organization like mine will take her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:New poster here. I want to respond to those coming down so hard on flex time.
Presumably, we are paid for the hours we work. So if someone in your group is on the books for less hours than you, they should be compesated accordingly.

Agreed - so then what do co-workers care if their situation is different?
Worry about yourself, not your colleagues.

As an employee you can take that attitude but the boss doesn't have that luxury because she in fact does have to worry about the rest of the colleagues.

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the responses, but when I worked for a jerk of a boss, really it was a company mentality, so it wasn't anything I could change other than quitting. I went out and bought the book, "The No Asshole Rule: Building a Civilized Workplace and Surviving One That Isn't ". It helped me deal with the situation until I was able to find a new position.

http://www.amazon.com/Asshole-Rule-Civilized-Workplace-Surviving/dp/0446698202/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1305569275&sr=1-1

Also, I suggest this book to all women: "Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office:101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers". Some of it is common sense, but still I found a lot of good tips.

http://www.amazon.com/Nice-Girls-Dont-Corner-Office/dp/0446693316/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1305569168&sr=1-1

[Anonymous]

I posted before but I am interested in hearing what you (OP) have to say about the responses that don't support you.

[Anonymous]

7:44 - AMEN.

9:53 - we used to run our company like yours. Really, all it takes is one person taking advantage, everyone finds out about it, and it is positively toxic. Needless to say, we now have a zero tolerance policy. People like OP ruin it for others. She admitted herself that she is using the flex time for her own benefit, not having to do with work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted before but I am interested in hearing what you (OP) have to say about the responses that don't support you.

I think she's the one running around calling them creeps.

[Anonymous]

Removal of flex time is not bullying. The revamping of the job description might be, or it might be a pre-emptive response to upcoming retirements/layoffs/etc.

If you don't like the new arrangement, leave, but remember what 7:57 said, nothing is permanent. Also if you appear more worried about flex time in an interview, you might be at a disadvantage. Flex time is something given to folks who've proven their worth typically ...