inheritance shockers

[Anonymous]

My grandfather died when I was in my early 20s. He was loaded. He left something to each of his 3 children (including my parents), and $10k to each grandkid. I was young and that was a windfall that allowed me to have an emergency fund, make some car repairs I had been putting off, and, take a small vacation. Unfortunately for me, he left millions to charity. But, his money to do with what he wants. My parents who are now elderly, leave everything to their kids, split equally. I hope not to see that money for a long time, but I fear they are at the beginning of the end so to speak

[Anonymous]

Honestly, it's sad. My in laws both died very shortly after they retired and far younger than expected (one from Covid in the early days, the other from an agressive and fast cancer) so my husband ended up inheriting their retirement money. We want to honor what they would have wanted so we're setting most of it away for the benefit of their grandkids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

I feel like missed assets like that are going to become more common. In the past there were always mailed statements and you could find assets through paperwork. With everything online now, it’s going to be harder to track stuff down if the decedent isn’t organized and doesn’t write stuff down.

[Anonymous]

One sibling robbed the rest of us. There was no will. She managed to get all of it. She is estranged from the family now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My divorce lawyer, when I asked for a recommendation for an estate lawyer for a will, said since I didn’t own any property I didn’t need a will yet. Is that true? My assets are in liquid investments and pension at the moment. I am 43.

Yes that’s kinda true. Leave beneficiaries on file at each institution and your family won’t need probate

[Anonymous]

I had an aunt die during covid. She was a weird recluse, younger sibling of my father. Had lived with my grandmother and when grandma died, my aunt kind of went of the hoarder deep-end. The house was a mess. Her car was packed full. She was obese. But...she had a steady job with a 401k. The estate lawyer in my midwestern hometown was quite good and saw the housing market as strong. Urged us to put around 50k in to spiff up the house, and ended up selling for a top rate (it was the height of the market when people were searching for rural acreage). Between the 401k, the house sale, and a few other odds and ends, the three sibling descendants each got 80k, so I ended up with 40k, (my sibling got the other 40k of the 80k that was my deceased dad's share). Complete surprise, given that we had expected to chip in to bury her.

[Anonymous]

I was not prepared for my dad to pass away quickly a few years after he retired. He saved pretty much every dollar he made and never got to spend it. I guess I never really thought about how much he had saved. He would talk about how his money kept growing even after taking his RMD. Between SS, his pension and half of my mom's pension, he didn't really touch his IRAs. His $2m in retirement allowed me to retire early.

[Anonymous]

I received $200,000 from a great aunt I met only once, when my parents and I helped her move from her house to a condo. Her will provided that the income from her investments would go to her sister-in-law (always described in the family as a barmaid with a heart of gold) then the estate was split among her great nieces and nephew.

[Anonymous]

My minor DC will receive ca $300k at 18 from his father's estate. Really did not think there was any money, but job had a life insurance as a benefit. Plan is to leave it to grow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

Oh, no, I would hate this. Let people plan their finances.
Imagine forgoing private school or that neighborhood you would have preferred or an expensive sport or instrument for your kid, because you needed to be financially responsible, and then finding out there was money for it all along but your deceased relative thought it would be fun to keep it a secret.

[Anonymous]

The best thing to do, OP, is to not expect anything from anyone. No one should build their financial plan relying on a hypothetical inheritance. At this point, elder care is so expensive that I imagine our parents will use up all their money in their old age.

[Anonymous]

I had a great Aunt who left all the family money from her husband, my grandmother's brother, to a college which now has an auditorium named after her. What a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

Oh, no, I would hate this. Let people plan their finances.
Imagine forgoing private school or that neighborhood you would have preferred or an expensive sport or instrument for your kid, because you needed to be financially responsible, and then finding out there was money for it all along but your deceased relative thought it would be fun to keep it a secret.

Well, it is the relatives money until it is not. There are no guarantees ever. They can do with it anything they want including keeping it a secret.
Plus, should we not all be "financially responsible" regardless of what may or may not be ahead?

[Anonymous]

Not a shocker because they told everyone what they planned to do. My mother’s first cousin and his wife set up a scholarship fund for all graduates at the local high school that were headed to one of the in state universities. They were childless and between them they had one nephew who did not need the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sorta. 10 years ago, my aunt (mom's sister) died and my brother and I were her only heirs. We both inherited $1M. We knew before she died that we were her beneficiaries so the inheritance and amount was not a shock at all. Her estate was very well organized and her lawyer seemed 100% on top of things.

Fast forward 10 years, we get notice from an annuity company that there was a $200,000 annuity that had never been distributed. We tried to contact the lawyer, but had no luck (long story.). What was shocking was how this one sizable asset was "lost."

My aunt passed shortly after my mom passed and we weren't excited about the inheritance - the grief was so raw. But 10 years later, it was like we won the lottery. I put the money into a dream renovation of my home and my brother used his to help build his retirement home.

I am an estate planning paralegal and thought I had heard of it all! Thank you PP for sharing this.

I agree that it is awful that the attorney missed an annuity. That it was is quite concerning for many reasons, but the silver lining part is that it was a wonderful and exciting surprise for this PP and her brother. I can't stop thinking about that and while I would not recommend this, but what if there was a way to actually draft that type of 10 year "hey, there is a bit more!" surprise into an EP document? It is like a hug from the other side in the most surprising way.

Oh, no, I would hate this. Let people plan their finances.
Imagine forgoing private school or that neighborhood you would have preferred or an expensive sport or instrument for your kid, because you needed to be financially responsible, and then finding out there was money for it all along but your deceased relative thought it would be fun to keep it a secret.

Well, it is the relatives money until it is not. There are no guarantees ever. They can do with it anything they want including keeping it a secret.
Plus, should we not all be "financially responsible" regardless of what may or may not be ahead?

PP was saying "wouldn't it be fun if you structured your estate to provide a surprise bonus 10 years after you died" and I am saying "no, that's a dick move and it would be kinder to just give people the money you want to give them."
You coming in with "but they're allowed to do what they want with their money" doesn't keep it from being a dick move.