Appropriate to wear black to a wedding?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No black.

Maybe get with the times. It's 2026 not 1926

Good manners never go out of style. Let’s add don’t wear overly bold colors or revealing clothing. No beach wear or flip flops. Geez, some people really must have grown up in the tenement housing with no one to teach them the basics.. should we add don’t eat with your hands (except foods designed to), no vulgar language, and no overly aggressive gestures. It’s appropriate to bring a gift.

These social norms are to ensue people are comfortable, which is what good manners mean. Buy a book; there are plenty.

If you want to ensure people are comfortable, don’t make them go out and buy clothing to please you. Let them wear the stuff they already own.

Oh, and the reference to “tenement housing” really shows your class. The people you are trying to emulate would never say it.

I emulate no one - anonymous board and all that. And most people have something appropriate in their closet. I wouldn’t expect anyone to go out and buy something new - where did I say that? I’m sure OP has an appropriate dress in a different color. A 430 wedding is not a black tie event - church clothing would work.

People increasingly wear jeans to church these days.

[Anonymous]

Black dress worn to a wedding always make me think that's the only dress you have in your closet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Black dress worn to a wedding always make me think that's the only dress you have in your closet.

That's because you're not a nice person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No black.

Maybe get with the times. It's 2026 not 1926

Good manners never go out of style. Let’s add don’t wear overly bold colors or revealing clothing. No beach wear or flip flops. Geez, some people really must have grown up in the tenement housing with no one to teach them the basics.. should we add don’t eat with your hands (except foods designed to), no vulgar language, and no overly aggressive gestures. It’s appropriate to bring a gift.

These social norms are to ensue people are comfortable, which is what good manners mean. Buy a book; there are plenty.

If you want to ensure people are comfortable, don’t make them go out and buy clothing to please you. Let them wear the stuff they already own.

Oh, and the reference to “tenement housing” really shows your class. The people you are trying to emulate would never say it.

I emulate no one - anonymous board and all that. And most people have something appropriate in their closet. I wouldn’t expect anyone to go out and buy something new - where did I say that? I’m sure OP has an appropriate dress in a different color. A 430 wedding is not a black tie event - church clothing would work.

People increasingly wear jeans to church these days.

Fine, wear jeans then. I think you (and most people) got the point by “church clothing” and are just argumentative. Work of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No black.

Maybe get with the times. It's 2026 not 1926

Good manners never go out of style. Let’s add don’t wear overly bold colors or revealing clothing. No beach wear or flip flops. Geez, some people really must have grown up in the tenement housing with no one to teach them the basics.. should we add don’t eat with your hands (except foods designed to), no vulgar language, and no overly aggressive gestures. It’s appropriate to bring a gift.

These social norms are to ensue people are comfortable, which is what good manners mean. Buy a book; there are plenty.

If you want to ensure people are comfortable, don’t make them go out and buy clothing to please you. Let them wear the stuff they already own.

Oh, and the reference to “tenement housing” really shows your class. The people you are trying to emulate would never say it.

I emulate no one - anonymous board and all that. And most people have something appropriate in their closet. I wouldn’t expect anyone to go out and buy something new - where did I say that? I’m sure OP has an appropriate dress in a different color. A 430 wedding is not a black tie event - church clothing would work.

People increasingly wear jeans to church these days.

Fine, wear jeans then. I think you (and most people) got the point by “church clothing” and are just argumentative. Work of that.

No, I think that you're out of touch with how people dress today vs 40 years ago and can't accept it so you're lashing out at strangers.

[Anonymous]

It's fine as you see I'm the replies, lots of people wear black. But personally I feel it's overdone and not festive or the kind of vibe I really wanted at my wedding. That said I didn't dictate what my guests could wear and at the end of the day no one is really going to pay that much attention to a random guest. Just sounds boring.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NO RED!

You’re insane if you think a guest can’t wear red jewelry. What are you, afraid of the devil or something?

I think PP meant no red dress. No one would think no red applies to jewelry or accents on a dress - for example a cute floral a-line with red on the flowers.

Only nowhere did the op imply she was considering wearing a red dress. She mentioned red accessories since it’s Valentine’s Day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine. I like the jewelry idea.

This.

Another +1 to this. Black is the new "appropriate for everything" color. My bridesmaids wore black.

Hmm. That's unusual and I think guests should check with the couple to ask if they can wear black.

Totally disagree. Are you 95 years old?

I would be completely upset as a bride to have guests checking colors with me. Who has time for that?

There are plenty of people well under 95 who would be offended if you wore black to a wedding.

They are most likely living in the deep south, and not in a big city. But they, and their culture, exists, and your ignorance and desperate need to be nasty (and ageist) on the internet cloaked by anonymity doesn't change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's fine as you see I'm the replies, lots of people wear black. But personally I feel it's overdone and not festive or the kind of vibe I really wanted at my wedding. That said I didn't dictate what my guests could wear and at the end of the day no one is really going to pay that much attention to a random guest. Just sounds boring.

I’ll never understand this. So it’s cool for men to wear all black (and a white shirt!) but not women? We need to wear bright and cheery colors? For whom?

[Anonymous]

Having bridesmaids dressed in black is completely different from being a guest who suddenly shows up in black when no one else is.

Surely people can understand this. Don't do it, OP, and certainly not for a daytime wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know the consensus is that it’s fine for an evening wedding. The wedding in question is on Valentine’s Day at 4:30pm, and while the venue is upscale, the wedding itself is fairly casual (the ceremony will be held at the same location.)

I have a black A line dress with sleeves, thick material and wintery. I was going to dress it up with red or pink jewelry for the “holiday”.

What are the rules on wearing black? Thanks!

Not at 4:30pm. If it was 5:30 or 6:00pm it would be ok.

I'm sorry, but these rules are just silly.

Ok, you can just look silly. You must be the girl who thinks it's fine to wear white. Whatever looks good on your Insta.

Wait, the people on Instagram will know whether OP was wearing the dress at 4:30 or 5:30? Is it ok if they snap the photo at 6, then it's appropriate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NO RED!

You’re insane if you think a guest can’t wear red jewelry. What are you, afraid of the devil or something?

I think PP meant no red dress. No one would think no red applies to jewelry or accents on a dress - for example a cute floral a-line with red on the flowers.

Only nowhere did the op imply she was considering wearing a red dress. She mentioned red accessories since it’s Valentine’s Day.

True. Then I totally agree with you - red jewelry is totally fine - actually festive on Valentine’s

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine. I like the jewelry idea.

This.

Another +1 to this. Black is the new "appropriate for everything" color. My bridesmaids wore black.

Hmm. That's unusual and I think guests should check with the couple to ask if they can wear black.

Totally disagree. Are you 95 years old?

I would be completely upset as a bride to have guests checking colors with me. Who has time for that?

There are plenty of people well under 95 who would be offended if you wore black to a wedding.

They are most likely living in the deep south, and not in a big city. But they, and their culture, exists, and your ignorance and desperate need to be nasty (and ageist) on the internet cloaked by anonymity doesn't change that.

100%!

[Anonymous]

I'm Parisian born and bred, not from the deep rural South in the US, and would never wear black to a wedding, unless that was the dress code. While black is very elegant, I think it's a very severe shade for weddings, which are supposed to be festive occasions. To me festive means not black. And I don't think much of menswear, to be honest. They don't have much choice and it's all drab.

So don't think of it in terms of city people vs country people or sophisticated vs unpolished. Most of the world doesn't do black for festive occasions, that's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's fine as you see I'm the replies, lots of people wear black. But personally I feel it's overdone and not festive or the kind of vibe I really wanted at my wedding. That said I didn't dictate what my guests could wear and at the end of the day no one is really going to pay that much attention to a random guest. Just sounds boring.

I’ll never understand this. So it’s cool for men to wear all black (and a white shirt!) but not women? We need to wear bright and cheery colors? For whom?

Are you aware that a wedding is a tradition with traditional cultures. Is it really the occasion to bring your “bucking the trend” attitude to your friend’s day? This is a ‘go along to get along’ situation. You do you - just don’t expect to get invited to many future events like this.