Parents divorcing after 50 years of marriage

[Anonymous]

Damn. I can’t believe the number of selfish adult children in this thread who think their parents have an obligation to stay together to appease their 30yo+ adult children.

[Anonymous]

What’s the driver, OP? Why do you think they’re pulling the trigger?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

This.

Financially it's a disaster. They can't afford as much divorced as they could have together. Your dad will likely remarry and she'll get everything.

Inheritance is dumb anyway. We should tax inheritance at 90% and block gifts from people over 60 to pay for medicare.

This would be a new, 2nd wife inheriting everything, not kids. Presumably wives would still inherit their spouse's money.

I don't think marriage should be allowed after a certain age. All around my parents' friends I see fortune hunters marrying older men as their retirement plan and it's crazy weird.

It's basically paying for in-home long-term care. I don't see the problem. It would be very expensive to pay for that on an hourly basis.

I think it's strange that kids feel entitled to someone else's money.

It's their parents, not some neighbor they wave to occasionally. This is true the world over.

That doesn't make it any less strange. The kids didn't do anything to earn that money.

[Anonymous]

I bet your mom is declining and your dad is bailing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

Grow the hell up. STILL thinking parents should stay together for “the kids.” It’s not all about you.

AMEN!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Damn. I can’t believe the number of selfish adult children in this thread who think their parents have an obligation to stay together to appease their 30yo+ adult children.

That's not why. It's because I've seen this go really badly for the people who are divorcing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I bet your mom is declining and your dad is bailing.

That would make sense. Bail off that sinking ship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

Grow the hell up. STILL thinking parents should stay together for “the kids.” It’s not all about you.

Tell that to the parents who will soon want tons of help from "the kids."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

This.

Financially it's a disaster. They can't afford as much divorced as they could have together. Your dad will likely remarry and she'll get everything.

Inheritance is dumb anyway. We should tax inheritance at 90% and block gifts from people over 60 to pay for medicare.

This would be a new, 2nd wife inheriting everything, not kids. Presumably wives would still inherit their spouse's money.

I don't think marriage should be allowed after a certain age. All around my parents' friends I see fortune hunters marrying older men as their retirement plan and it's crazy weird.

It's basically paying for in-home long-term care. I don't see the problem. It would be very expensive to pay for that on an hourly basis.

I think it's strange that kids feel entitled to someone else's money.

It's their parents, not some neighbor they wave to occasionally. This is true the world over.

That doesn't make it any less strange. The kids didn't do anything to earn that money.

Being a kid isn't a job. It's only strange if you're completely ignorant of family dynamics and laws.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Damn. I can’t believe the number of selfish adult children in this thread who think their parents have an obligation to stay together to appease their 30yo+ adult children.

That's not why. It's because I've seen this go really badly for the people who are divorcing.

That probably just means it is their time to go. You aren't meant to live forever. Eventually one spouse would put the other on an ice floe.

[Anonymous]

Did they have a 50 year anniversary? And then they called it quits? Are they both in good health?

This is rare because most people and marriages just dont last that long. And most that do think its more of a hassle to get out than stay. There had to have been something traumatic below the surface here to make ir worth their time.

I would encourage each to find a retirement community to move in to. Sell their house and assets and split it and see how long the money will last them in their new homes. Your burden will be to visit. But their care and eventual death may be easier logistically if they find a place to stay in now and downgrade most of their things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My aunt and uncle did this. My uncle remarried and was a happier human being. My aunt remained bitter and angry. My cousins were each closer to one parent and that's who they took/take care of. My uncle has passed away but my aunt is still alive.

Uncle was probably cheating …

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

Grow the hell up. STILL thinking parents should stay together for “the kids.” It’s not all about you.

Tell that to the parents who will soon want tons of help from "the kids."

So don't "help." No one is holding a gun to your head. Let's face it, you'll be bitc1ng about helping even if they stay together.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

This.

Financially it's a disaster. They can't afford as much divorced as they could have together. Your dad will likely remarry and she'll get everything.

Inheritance is dumb anyway. We should tax inheritance at 90% and block gifts from people over 60 to pay for medicare.

This would be a new, 2nd wife inheriting everything, not kids. Presumably wives would still inherit their spouse's money.

I don't think marriage should be allowed after a certain age. All around my parents' friends I see fortune hunters marrying older men as their retirement plan and it's crazy weird.

It's basically paying for in-home long-term care. I don't see the problem. It would be very expensive to pay for that on an hourly basis.

I think it's strange that kids feel entitled to someone else's money.

It's their parents, not some neighbor they wave to occasionally. This is true the world over.

That doesn't make it any less strange. The kids didn't do anything to earn that money.

Being a kid isn't a job. It's only strange if you're completely ignorant of family dynamics and laws.

Either way, you aren't entitled to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd be so angry if my parents did this. It's ALL going to fall on you now as their kid. Even little appts like eye appts where they dilate your eyes will need someone to drive the parent. Parents should be helping each other through sicknesses in old age and not burdening their kids. And multiple holidays now...

My aunt and uncle did this and financially they really never recovered.

This.

Financially it's a disaster. They can't afford as much divorced as they could have together. Your dad will likely remarry and she'll get everything.

Inheritance is dumb anyway. We should tax inheritance at 90% and block gifts from people over 60 to pay for medicare.

This would be a new, 2nd wife inheriting everything, not kids. Presumably wives would still inherit their spouse's money.

I don't think marriage should be allowed after a certain age. All around my parents' friends I see fortune hunters marrying older men as their retirement plan and it's crazy weird.

It's basically paying for in-home long-term care. I don't see the problem. It would be very expensive to pay for that on an hourly basis.

I think it's strange that kids feel entitled to someone else's money.

It's their parents, not some neighbor they wave to occasionally. This is true the world over.

That doesn't make it any less strange. The kids didn't do anything to earn that money.

Being a kid isn't a job. It's only strange if you're completely ignorant of family dynamics and laws.

Laws written by rich people hoarding money. It is archaic at best. It is terrible to reward people for not working.