Questions for people who've gone out to eat alone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:New job requires travel, so I'm going to be frequently eating in my hotel room, however, I'm not entirely opposed to eating out alone. For those of you who do it:

1. You sit at the bar, right? Do you walk in and walk out if the bar has no seats and/or the bar only has one open seat, which means you have to squeeze in tightly between two groups? I think I'd be deeply uncomfortable eating with randoms that close to me on both sides.

2. What do you do if the bar has no TV? I assume with or without TV, you just play on your phone most of the time? And if no TV, you basically play on your phone the entire time? If there's a TV, at least you can look up and let it occupy chunks of your time.

3. Do you tend to eat really quickly when alone? While you're eating, and in-between bites, do you look around or look straight ahead? I don't see any reason to pause, I think I'd just hoover up my food and quickly pay.

4. Sort of related to 3, do you give you credit card when you order to speed up cashing out and your exit?[/quote

I always sat alone at a table. No interest in being hit on at the bar and didn’t want to make chit chat. I’m an introvert and was happy to have some down time at the end of the day. But, I was already used to eating alone at restaurants.

[Anonymous]

I'm a married woman who travels a lot. I sit wherever, bar or table depending on my mood, the restaurant layout, and where they seat me. I frequently have my laptop and might do some work before food is served. I will often have a glass of wine or coffee, so I might be sitting longer than the meal itself...but regardless I don't rush. I tip the normal amount.

You are way overthinking this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to be rude but you’re overthinking this. But to humor you: I tend to eat at the bar, eat at a normal pace, and will read a magazine or my phone if no TV. It can also be fun to chit chat with other bar patrons. Have fun!

I have no interest in this. And would actually hope to avoid this.

Then why would you hope to only sit at the bar?? Sitting at the bar alone invites way more conversation than asking for a table for 1. Signed, I have eaten alone many times throughout my life and always prefer a table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^People watching. Enjoying an atmosphere. Enjoying a view. Enjoying the weather. Lots of reasons.

And regarding the phone thing. Your bar neighbor does not care what you're looking at on your phone.

A barstool faces the bar. Are you saying you randomly spin 180 degrees and just start looking around the restaurant and making eye contact with random people? I honestly don't get what you mean. Unless I was meeting people and looking to see if they're there and get their attention, I'm not sure why I'd divert how I'm sitting and start looking around a place for extended periods of time.

What in God's name are you talking about? Are you from another planet and you're trying to figure out how human beings operate when eating food at a bar or restaurant? We have necks that have range of motion, so, if we want to look around a little bit, we turn our heads thanks to our necks. You do not have to swivel your barstool around to look around your environment a little. Any other questions about the human experience?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your questions seem to indicate an embarrassment around eating alone. First of all, business travel ends up like this constantly so everyone will assume the exact truth. Second, eating alone during work travel is my greatest joy. I straight up go for tasting menus. I always eat at the bar, I’ll bring a book, notebook for thoughts, and a phone. I usually end up chit chatting with someone. But get real comfy and enjoy myself. What a luxury. Get the most expensive glass of wine! Work is paying!

I'd say more-so anxiety than embarrassment. I have zero anxiety about eating at a nearly empty bar with a TV. Not that I care about whatever sport is probably playing, but it's something to keep you occupied. Eating at a super busy bar with randoms on top of me on both sides, with no TV, I don't think I'm interested in that at all. Also no TV and randoms immediately next to me on both sides means they can see everything I'm doing on my phone, which seems creepy and invasive. And a high likelihood they'll try to talk to me. No thanks.

So why not focus on finding an empty bar with a tv?

You never know what you're walking into! Even neighborhood restaurants I frequent with my husband will randomly have a full bar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^People watching. Enjoying an atmosphere. Enjoying a view. Enjoying the weather. Lots of reasons.

And regarding the phone thing. Your bar neighbor does not care what you're looking at on your phone.

A barstool faces the bar. Are you saying you randomly spin 180 degrees and just start looking around the restaurant and making eye contact with random people? I honestly don't get what you mean. Unless I was meeting people and looking to see if they're there and get their attention, I'm not sure why I'd divert how I'm sitting and start looking around a place for extended periods of time.

Sit at the bar when you feel chatty. Sit in a corner when you want to people watch. Sit on the deck when it's sunny. Sit at the window when there's a view of the bay.

I mean, geez lady...

Sorry, I'm just fascinated by how to kill time before being served your food. And I guess while eating too. That's why I assume I'd just quickly hoover up my food, because what else can you do to kill time when you're not talking to anyone.

Have you ever been alone? Also, how old are you? I'm 43 and spent many afternoons eating lunch at a table, alone, in my early 20s when I first started my career. Without a smart phone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I sit at a table. If I travel for work I am craving alone time, so I sit alone at a booth or table.

I usually bring my laptop and ask for the WiFi password but my phone works too.

I pay at the end like regular.

Same. Never occurred to me to sit at the bar when there were tables available. Sit alone at a table, sometimes just eat and watch people, often browse mindlessly. Like pp said, when traveling from work, I am all day around people in meetings so it’s a rare chance to decompress.

[Anonymous]

I think what you guys are failing to realize is that OP is an LA 10 and is HIGHLY magnetic. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute, trying to buy a plate of spaghetti in Milwaukee.

[Anonymous]

This is a weird question. I eat alone 99% of the time when I go out. It’s not difficult.

[Anonymous]

You sound anxious.... who needs to preplan all of that?

I eat out at least once a week - Nordstrom Cafe, Sushi or Thai places, La Madeline, etc places like that. I never eat at the bar- I just ask for my own seat. I'm married with kids FWIW, just enjoy the solitude. Sometimes I scroll this site, sometimes I make lists or update my paper calendar, sometimes I have a book to read. I just enjoy my time. No I don't rush- weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to be rude but you’re overthinking this. But to humor you: I tend to eat at the bar, eat at a normal pace, and will read a magazine or my phone if no TV. It can also be fun to chit chat with other bar patrons. Have fun!

I have no interest in this. And would actually hope to avoid this.

Then why would you hope to only sit at the bar?? Sitting at the bar alone invites way more conversation than asking for a table for 1. Signed, I have eaten alone many times throughout my life and always prefer a table.

See, I genuinely didn't know this unspoken rule. News to me!

And I figured being solo and taking up a table, likely meant for 4, is super rude to the restaurant and server!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a weird question. I eat alone 99% of the time when I go out. It’s not difficult.

It doesn't seem enjoyable in any way, if I'm being honest. Plus yes, it makes me anxious. I'm sure the food probably tastes slightly better than boxed up, but if your hotel is super close by, probably not that much worse than piping hot from the kitchen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to be rude but you’re overthinking this. But to humor you: I tend to eat at the bar, eat at a normal pace, and will read a magazine or my phone if no TV. It can also be fun to chit chat with other bar patrons. Have fun!

I have no interest in this. And would actually hope to avoid this.

Then why would you hope to only sit at the bar?? Sitting at the bar alone invites way more conversation than asking for a table for 1. Signed, I have eaten alone many times throughout my life and always prefer a table.

See, I genuinely didn't know this unspoken rule. News to me!

And I figured being solo and taking up a table, likely meant for 4, is super rude to the restaurant and server!

You are an overthinker.

[Anonymous]

1. You sit at the bar, right? Do you walk in and walk out if the bar has no seats and/or the bar only has one open seat, which means you have to squeeze in tightly between two groups? I think I'd be deeply uncomfortable eating with randoms that close to me on both sides.

I never sit at the bar. Because I don't drink. I only order ice water.

2. What do you do if the bar has no TV? I assume with or without TV, you just play on your phone most of the time? And if no TV, you basically play on your phone the entire time? If there's a TV, at least you can look up and let it occupy chunks of your time.

See #1, but I don't use my phone during meals (except at the end to calculate the tip) - I bring a book. If I were you traveling, I'd bring a Kindle or iPad or whatever to read.

3. Do you tend to eat really quickly when alone? While you're eating, and in-between bites, do you look around or look straight ahead? I don't see any reason to pause, I think I'd just hoover up my food and quickly pay.

I just eat normally. I am not ashamed of eating alone. I eat at a normal pace and read. If there is interesting people-watching I'll look, but generally people are boring so I ignore for the most part.

4. Sort of related to 3, do you give you credit card when you order to speed up cashing out and your exit?

No. There's NO RUSH. I am not eating at some packed restaurant where people are waiting 45 minutes for a table.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think what you guys are failing to realize is that OP is an LA 10 and is HIGHLY magnetic. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute, trying to buy a plate of spaghetti in Milwaukee.

Haha. I'm going to try it, I'm just pepping myself up to do it. But I honestly just don't see how it's enjoyable to sit there alone. I don't drink, so I don't sip cocktails or wine before dinner. I doubt the food is going to be THAT much better straight from the kitchen versus diving in after a five minute walk to my hotel room.