How do you explain this parent behavior

[Anonymous]

What strikes me as weird:
1. Sleepovers.
2. Sleepovers primarily at their house.
3. No concern for you or dc after accident
4. Friend #2 suddenly cold.

Conclusion- you are being used for entertainment and it could possibly be nefarious. I’d cool things off and only do hangouts in public where you can monitor (nit dark place like movie theater).

[Anonymous]

Why is your 12 year old driving

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Could friend #1 have told his parents already about the car accident and told them your son is physically OK? They may not have wanted to make a big deal out of it if they already heard he’s uninjured. I can see them potentially not wanting to be embarrassingly over effusive.

OP here. Parent of friend 1 typically reads and replies to messages (all kids-related) promptly. I doubt they didn’t read. And my child did get injured, although they recovered, and has a scar to this day. Anyway this behavior shows lack of respect and consideration for sure towards me and I think my son too. If somebody they value more had written the some message they would have not replied with a like. They would have probably taken the initiative to ask about my child’s health when they heard about the accident from somebody else, as it happened with other parents.

Anyway I really don’t care about people like this. It’s just makes me sad to raise my kids in this kind of village with such cut-throat people. And I have not told you about the incident related to friend 2, which is even worse.

OP, you keep “teasing” this incident with F2. You want us to beg you to disclose, dragging out your drama. Why? Just spit it out or drop it if you don’t want to for whatever reason. Is there always so much drama with you or are you making this whole thing up?

[Anonymous]

You sound tiring, OP.

Your kid will be in middle school soon, if not already. The parents won’t even be texting you anymore.

I rarely text with any parents of my teens except the ones who are my actual friends.

[Anonymous]

A sad emoji would seem flippant to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound tiring, OP.

Your kid will be in middle school soon, if not already. The parents won’t even be texting you anymore.

I rarely text with any parents of my teens except the ones who are my actual friends.

OP is tiring, doesn't reciprocate and analyzes everything too much. If kids initiate the friendship, most parents will make the drop offs and pickups work without caring too much about the other parents. They are not thinking about you, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What were you expecting Parents #1 to do?

They were probably surprised to hear about the car accident and didn't know what to say.

It seems they have hosted a lot.

Can you set up a daytime playdate and invite their kid to it? Movie at a local theater?

NP. What are you talking about? Anyone who “doesn’t know what to say” about a car accident is weird or deliberately unkind. You say, “Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear that, and I hope he makes a full recovery very soon.” That’s what you would say to a perfect stranger sitting next to you on an airplane who told you their son was in a car accident and they were going to visit him. So you extend the same kindness and courtesy to the parent of your child’s FRIEND. What, actually, is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were you expecting Parents #1 to do?

They were probably surprised to hear about the car accident and didn't know what to say.

It seems they have hosted a lot.

Can you set up a daytime playdate and invite their kid to it? Movie at a local theater?

NP. What are you talking about? Anyone who “doesn’t know what to say” about a car accident is weird or deliberately unkind. You say, “Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear that, and I hope he makes a full recovery very soon.” That’s what you would say to a perfect stranger sitting next to you on an airplane who told you their son was in a car accident and they were going to visit him. So you extend the same kindness and courtesy to the parent of your child’s FRIEND. What, actually, is wrong with you?

Probably the kid was in school Thursday and Friday with a bandaid or something and the parent didn’t register that this was a BIG DEAL and just said “thumbs up” and went on with her day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were you expecting Parents #1 to do?

They were probably surprised to hear about the car accident and didn't know what to say.

It seems they have hosted a lot.

Can you set up a daytime playdate and invite their kid to it? Movie at a local theater?

NP. What are you talking about? Anyone who “doesn’t know what to say” about a car accident is weird or deliberately unkind. You say, “Oh no, I’m so sorry to hear that, and I hope he makes a full recovery very soon.” That’s what you would say to a perfect stranger sitting next to you on an airplane who told you their son was in a car accident and they were going to visit him. So you extend the same kindness and courtesy to the parent of your child’s FRIEND. What, actually, is wrong with you?

Probably the kid was in school Thursday and Friday with a bandaid or something and the parent didn’t register that this was a BIG DEAL and just said “thumbs up” and went on with her day.

I’m a person who would follow up for minor injuries.

My kids get banged up in sports all the time. DH is a physician so maybe we hear about injuries all the time but it wouldn’t occur to me to collect sympathy from people.

My friend cut her hand and drove herself to the hospital. I thought it was a huge deal. My friend made it seem like no big deal and not even worth mentioning.

[Anonymous]

OP, this is very typical of white people around here, especially those with “top jobs” like lawyers and lobbyists. They are so, so transactional. Don’t have a second to waste beyond completing the transaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is very typical of white people around here, especially those with “top jobs” like lawyers and lobbyists. They are so, so transactional. Don’t have a second to waste beyond completing the transaction.

Did OP say they are White? Or are you assuming they are because they have big jobs and live in an expensive neighborhood? Are you saying Black people can’t have big jobs?

Remember: OP is White.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They racist

They jealous.

[Anonymous]

This seems like an odd way to tell someone who is fairly close to your child that he was in a car accident. What if they hadn’t invited him over that weekend? Were you never going to tell them?
If someone here decided that their relationship with your child wasn’t that close, I think it was you. They were just following your lead.

[Anonymous]

Could it be the parent of child one was super busy, saw a no to a sleepover invite and acknowledged with a like without reading the reason? And never getting back to that text because by end of day they received 59 more texts.

That’s me. Honestly, I barely keep up with texts between work and managing kids social life. Some parents send long and multiple texts, I just do yes/no/when/I can do it/thanks for doing it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, this is very typical of white people around here, especially those with “top jobs” like lawyers and lobbyists. They are so, so transactional. Don’t have a second to waste beyond completing the transaction.

Did OP say they are White? Or are you assuming they are because they have big jobs and live in an expensive neighborhood? Are you saying Black people can’t have big jobs?

Remember: OP is White.

My statement stands. I guess if OP’s friend isn’t white then it is an irrelevant statement. But it is very true that white DC-based people are incredibly transactional. They are too “busy” with their jobs and seem to lack EQ as well. This is not true of the wealthy Asian and Black people I know.