Debating whether to quit work at 50

[Anonymous]

QUIT

[Anonymous]

Can you reduce for a few years? With a kid in college and another close to leaving, I’m glad I have my job. You gain back an enormous amount of time when the kids leave, and for me it’s been enough to work FT, work out, and pick up several new hobbies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m closing in on 50, two young teen kids, and am in the very fortunate position that we do not need my income. I’m trying to decide whether to step out of the workforce—including potentially keeping one toe in with some kind of minimal consulting—but mainly focusing on volunteering and other activities I find fulfilling. Right now I work about 75% time and am relatively low-earning, and while my colleagues are wonderful and the work is intellectually stimulating, it’s also very stressful. That’s the nature of the niche area I’m in so a new job wouldn’t have an impact there.

Even though I know that quitting my job will have no meaningful effect on our finances, it still feels pretty weird to make this change after almost 30 years in the workforce. DH is supportive of whatever I decide but wants to make sure this isn’t a grass-is-greener phenomenon.

I don’t really have friends IRL in this situation and feel awkward talking about it. I’d welcome input from anyone in the DCUM crowd who has considered this kind of early retirement (or whatever it should be called), whether you ultimately took the plunge or not. Any regrets? Things to think about ahead of time? Thanks!

I did not read the thread, OP, so this may be redundant.
DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB.
Please. You will never work again.
I quit my job, thinking, I'll jump right back in when my kids are in school.
I was over 50 when I started job hunting, and I got nowhere. My age, and that gap in my work history killed me.
I ended up going back to school and training for another profession, which I'm in now.
It was a terrible mistake to become a SAHM, and I regret it totally.
If you can work 50% of the time, that will be OK, but don't work much less than that.
When your kids are in college, and your nest is empty, you will want to go back to work, and you'll find doors slamming shut in your face.
BTW, I have two Ivy degrees, and years of experience. I never thought I'd have trouble finding a job because I've always found employment very quickly and easily.
Yes, the job market has changed, but I'm certain I would have been able to bounce back from a part-time job if I'd stayed in the work force.
You will be bored out of your mind at home, especially if you don't have nonworking friends.
I don't need the money, but I need to work for my sanity!!! And I love the work I do now. I'm not going to stop working until I'm 100!

Conversely, I was in fed gvt before kids, stayed home for a couple decades and got a FT fed job in my field after 9 months of job searching. I guess it helps NOT to have an Ivy League degree. Or maybe state school grads are just scrappier

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, please do not depend on volunteer work to fill your days. If you are an educated, accomplished person, you'll end up doing pretty routine things as a volunteer, and your skills and intelligence will not be appreciated. Volunteers are generally treated poorly. You are completely dispensable because you cost them nothing! If you don't have a relationship with an organization, it's hard to get situated as a volunteer. I've done tons of volunteer work, and I can't say I found any of it fulfilling, not nearly as fulfilling as working. And check your personality. The people who were happy retiring at 50 are happy because it suited them. Does filling your days with unpaid work and activities fulfill you and make you happy? If so, then go for it. If not, keep working. Also, remember your teens will be in college in a very short time. An empty nest can be devastating, especially for a SAHM. Your kids need you a lot, and then suddenly, they don't need you almost at all. If you've got a job to go to, that can dull the ache of the empty nest.

Actually, the SAHM I knew were grateful for the time with their kids and the moms went back to work with relish, fresh and ready to work. They were not worn out/burned out or regretful that they missed a lot of time with their kids because of a job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m closing in on 50, two young teen kids, and am in the very fortunate position that we do not need my income. I’m trying to decide whether to step out of the workforce—including potentially keeping one toe in with some kind of minimal consulting—but mainly focusing on volunteering and other activities I find fulfilling. Right now I work about 75% time and am relatively low-earning, and while my colleagues are wonderful and the work is intellectually stimulating, it’s also very stressful. That’s the nature of the niche area I’m in so a new job wouldn’t have an impact there.

Even though I know that quitting my job will have no meaningful effect on our finances, it still feels pretty weird to make this change after almost 30 years in the workforce. DH is supportive of whatever I decide but wants to make sure this isn’t a grass-is-greener phenomenon.

I don’t really have friends IRL in this situation and feel awkward talking about it. I’d welcome input from anyone in the DCUM crowd who has considered this kind of early retirement (or whatever it should be called), whether you ultimately took the plunge or not. Any regrets? Things to think about ahead of time? Thanks!

I did not read the thread, OP, so this may be redundant.
DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB.
Please. You will never work again.
I quit my job, thinking, I'll jump right back in when my kids are in school.
I was over 50 when I started job hunting, and I got nowhere. My age, and that gap in my work history killed me.
I ended up going back to school and training for another profession, which I'm in now.
It was a terrible mistake to become a SAHM, and I regret it totally.
If you can work 50% of the time, that will be OK, but don't work much less than that.
When your kids are in college, and your nest is empty, you will want to go back to work, and you'll find doors slamming shut in your face.
BTW, I have two Ivy degrees, and years of experience. I never thought I'd have trouble finding a job because I've always found employment very quickly and easily.
Yes, the job market has changed, but I'm certain I would have been able to bounce back from a part-time job if I'd stayed in the work force.
You will be bored out of your mind at home, especially if you don't have nonworking friends.
I don't need the money, but I need to work for my sanity!!! And I love the work I do now. I'm not going to stop working until I'm 100!

Conversely, I was in fed gvt before kids, stayed home for a couple decades and got a FT fed job in my field after 9 months of job searching. I guess it helps NOT to have an Ivy League degree. Or maybe state school grads are just scrappier

I’m sure PP wants to make more than Fed wages. Also being a previous Fed is a big boost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, please do not depend on volunteer work to fill your days. If you are an educated, accomplished person, you'll end up doing pretty routine things as a volunteer, and your skills and intelligence will not be appreciated. Volunteers are generally treated poorly. You are completely dispensable because you cost them nothing! If you don't have a relationship with an organization, it's hard to get situated as a volunteer. I've done tons of volunteer work, and I can't say I found any of it fulfilling, not nearly as fulfilling as working. And check your personality. The people who were happy retiring at 50 are happy because it suited them. Does filling your days with unpaid work and activities fulfill you and make you happy? If so, then go for it. If not, keep working. Also, remember your teens will be in college in a very short time. An empty nest can be devastating, especially for a SAHM. Your kids need you a lot, and then suddenly, they don't need you almost at all. If you've got a job to go to, that can dull the ache of the empty nest.

Actually, the SAHM I knew were grateful for the time with their kids and the moms went back to work with relish, fresh and ready to work. They were not worn out/burned out or regretful that they missed a lot of time with their kids because of a job.

I mean it comes down the the person and probably a job. A hobby job you pickup after nest is empty is generally chosen to be pleasant and fun.

[Anonymous]

As others suggested, part time may be the way to go so you can still do work you enjoy and are good at while having more free time to take care of yourself.

[Anonymous]

I would first try getting a different job. If you hate it, quit. But sometimes a change is as good as a rest.

[Anonymous]

Many people think they will find fulfilling opportunities volunteering or the like, and discover that it's very difficult - you're handing out brochures, putting stamps on envelopes, things like that. I would rather work at a non profit than volunteer.

With kids in college soon I can't imagine you would enjoy having all day every day to fill. I find I'm more fulfilled when I have many things to do. I love to work out and cook but I definitely don't need a full day to do so. I see a lot of bored, gossipy women in their 50s and 60s in my neighborhood whose lives revolve around pickleball, tennis, gardening etc and I don't want to be that.

Personally I would look for another low stress job vs retire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m closing in on 50, two young teen kids, and am in the very fortunate position that we do not need my income. I’m trying to decide whether to step out of the workforce—including potentially keeping one toe in with some kind of minimal consulting—but mainly focusing on volunteering and other activities I find fulfilling. Right now I work about 75% time and am relatively low-earning, and while my colleagues are wonderful and the work is intellectually stimulating, it’s also very stressful. That’s the nature of the niche area I’m in so a new job wouldn’t have an impact there.

Even though I know that quitting my job will have no meaningful effect on our finances, it still feels pretty weird to make this change after almost 30 years in the workforce. DH is supportive of whatever I decide but wants to make sure this isn’t a grass-is-greener phenomenon.

I don’t really have friends IRL in this situation and feel awkward talking about it. I’d welcome input from anyone in the DCUM crowd who has considered this kind of early retirement (or whatever it should be called), whether you ultimately took the plunge or not. Any regrets? Things to think about ahead of time? Thanks!

I did not read the thread, OP, so this may be redundant.
DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB.
Please. You will never work again.
I quit my job, thinking, I'll jump right back in when my kids are in school.
I was over 50 when I started job hunting, and I got nowhere. My age, and that gap in my work history killed me.
I ended up going back to school and training for another profession, which I'm in now.
It was a terrible mistake to become a SAHM, and I regret it totally.
If you can work 50% of the time, that will be OK, but don't work much less than that.
When your kids are in college, and your nest is empty, you will want to go back to work, and you'll find doors slamming shut in your face.
BTW, I have two Ivy degrees, and years of experience. I never thought I'd have trouble finding a job because I've always found employment very quickly and easily.
Yes, the job market has changed, but I'm certain I would have been able to bounce back from a part-time job if I'd stayed in the work force.
You will be bored out of your mind at home, especially if you don't have nonworking friends.
I don't need the money, but I need to work for my sanity!!! And I love the work I do now. I'm not going to stop working until I'm 100!

Conversely, I was in fed gvt before kids, stayed home for a couple decades and got a FT fed job in my field after 9 months of job searching. I guess it helps NOT to have an Ivy League degree. Or maybe state school grads are just scrappier

I’m sure PP wants to make more than Fed wages. Also being a previous Fed is a big boost.

NP. Fed wages have sufficed for my family. Geez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m closing in on 50, two young teen kids, and am in the very fortunate position that we do not need my income. I’m trying to decide whether to step out of the workforce—including potentially keeping one toe in with some kind of minimal consulting—but mainly focusing on volunteering and other activities I find fulfilling. Right now I work about 75% time and am relatively low-earning, and while my colleagues are wonderful and the work is intellectually stimulating, it’s also very stressful. That’s the nature of the niche area I’m in so a new job wouldn’t have an impact there.

Even though I know that quitting my job will have no meaningful effect on our finances, it still feels pretty weird to make this change after almost 30 years in the workforce. DH is supportive of whatever I decide but wants to make sure this isn’t a grass-is-greener phenomenon.

I don’t really have friends IRL in this situation and feel awkward talking about it. I’d welcome input from anyone in the DCUM crowd who has considered this kind of early retirement (or whatever it should be called), whether you ultimately took the plunge or not. Any regrets? Things to think about ahead of time? Thanks!

I did not read the thread, OP, so this may be redundant.
DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB.
Please. You will never work again.
I quit my job, thinking, I'll jump right back in when my kids are in school.
I was over 50 when I started job hunting, and I got nowhere. My age, and that gap in my work history killed me.
I ended up going back to school and training for another profession, which I'm in now.
It was a terrible mistake to become a SAHM, and I regret it totally.
If you can work 50% of the time, that will be OK, but don't work much less than that.
When your kids are in college, and your nest is empty, you will want to go back to work, and you'll find doors slamming shut in your face.
BTW, I have two Ivy degrees, and years of experience. I never thought I'd have trouble finding a job because I've always found employment very quickly and easily.
Yes, the job market has changed, but I'm certain I would have been able to bounce back from a part-time job if I'd stayed in the work force.
You will be bored out of your mind at home, especially if you don't have nonworking friends.
I don't need the money, but I need to work for my sanity!!! And I love the work I do now. I'm not going to stop working until I'm 100!

Conversely, I was in fed gvt before kids, stayed home for a couple decades and got a FT fed job in my field after 9 months of job searching. I guess it helps NOT to have an Ivy League degree. Or maybe state school grads are just scrappier

I’m sure PP wants to make more than Fed wages. Also being a previous Fed is a big boost.

NP. Fed wages have sufficed for my family. Geez.

Me, too, but I wonder if PP’s point was that the earlier poster noted her Ivy degrees - so maybe someone who brags Ivy wants more than fed wages? Who knows

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many people think they will find fulfilling opportunities volunteering or the like, and discover that it's very difficult - you're handing out brochures, putting stamps on envelopes, things like that. I would rather work at a non profit than volunteer.

With kids in college soon I can't imagine you would enjoy having all day every day to fill. I find I'm more fulfilled when I have many things to do. I love to work out and cook but I definitely don't need a full day to do so. I see a lot of bored, gossipy women in their 50s and 60s in my neighborhood whose lives revolve around pickleball, tennis, gardening etc and I don't want to be that.

Personally I would look for another low stress job vs retire.

But what would that be?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many people think they will find fulfilling opportunities volunteering or the like, and discover that it's very difficult - you're handing out brochures, putting stamps on envelopes, things like that. I would rather work at a non profit than volunteer.

With kids in college soon I can't imagine you would enjoy having all day every day to fill. I find I'm more fulfilled when I have many things to do. I love to work out and cook but I definitely don't need a full day to do so. I see a lot of bored, gossipy women in their 50s and 60s in my neighborhood whose lives revolve around pickleball, tennis, gardening etc and I don't want to be that.

Personally I would look for another low stress job vs retire.

But what would that be?

OP here and this is where I’m at. I would love a low-stress job for 15-20 hours a week that’s at least somewhat fulfilling, but what would that be? It’s possible I could pull off something like this with independent consulting but I don’t know.

I really appreciate the cautions about volunteering. I’m looking at some groups that offer GED tutoring to adults or other efforts that seem to match you with someone in need so maybe those would feel worthwhile? I’m not sure. I’m at least trying to find places that are really clear on volunteer tasks or where I know people already volunteering there. I hope to try out some of these but for others it probably wouldn’t be possible with my job and other commitments.

I’m still reading and thinking through all the comments! Thanks again to those who who’ve posted especially if this is a step you’ve taken or something you’ve considered or are now considering.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many people think they will find fulfilling opportunities volunteering or the like, and discover that it's very difficult - you're handing out brochures, putting stamps on envelopes, things like that. I would rather work at a non profit than volunteer.

With kids in college soon I can't imagine you would enjoy having all day every day to fill. I find I'm more fulfilled when I have many things to do. I love to work out and cook but I definitely don't need a full day to do so. I see a lot of bored, gossipy women in their 50s and 60s in my neighborhood whose lives revolve around pickleball, tennis, gardening etc and I don't want to be that.

Personally I would look for another low stress job vs retire.

But what would that be?

OP here and this is where I’m at. I would love a low-stress job for 15-20 hours a week that’s at least somewhat fulfilling, but what would that be? It’s possible I could pull off something like this with independent consulting but I don’t know.

I really appreciate the cautions about volunteering. I’m looking at some groups that offer GED tutoring to adults or other efforts that seem to match you with someone in need so maybe those would feel worthwhile? I’m not sure. I’m at least trying to find places that are really clear on volunteer tasks or where I know people already volunteering there. I hope to try out some of these but for others it probably wouldn’t be possible with my job and other commitments.

I’m still reading and thinking through all the comments! Thanks again to those who who’ve posted especially if this is a step you’ve taken or something you’ve considered or are now considering.

Thank you, OP, because I’ve been reading along and also find all the comments helpful.

[Anonymous]

Here’s the thing with volunteer tutoring. It takes a special person. Because tutoring someone who doesn’t have a high school diploma or doesn’t speak English also often means no or no reliable transportation, or no childcare, or no phone, etc. You will treat it like a job because that is what you are used to and it can get very frustrating when they don’t show up but also don’t or can’t tell you ahead of time. The pace can be very slow and people quit regularly. I’m not saying you shouldn’t try it. But, I wouldn’t quit my job without a clear understanding of how these volunteer roles actually work.