DD has started going to bed without saying good night

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes very normal.

I think it's more because they are scrolling tiktok or whatever before they actually sleep so they don't literally don't feel like, goodnight mommy i'm doing to bed, like when they were younger and good night meant, I am drifting to sleep in the next few minutes.

They are going into their own rooms and doing their own winding down. Not trying to be rude. In fact, maybe this is too deep, but saying good night might signify mentally, I am on my own now til morning. Maybe they don't want that- they want to know that you are there if they need them still. Just my pop armchair psychology lol. All this to say- normal normal normal inching towards independence.

I can see why it's a little sad for you though. I'm a single mom so I don't have a DH to turn to. But, I still have an elementary kid who wants my full attention until he's snoring!

Yikes my oldest is just 15 but they and their friends whose parents I know are not allowed to take phones in their bedrooms at night.

Yikes! Well mine is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ordinary. No reason you can't go in and give them a kiss goodnight, once you notice. That would be sweet. Doing something nice without expecting anything in return.

+1
I do this with my son. He’ll usually come give me a hug or even flop on my bed to chat before bed, but when he doesn’t it’s ok. I’ll just go in and give him a quick kiss on the cheek or forehead, just like my parents used to do for me. My mom still does this when we stay with her; I always say goodnight as an adult, but she’ll still pop in and give me a kiss. I’ll even sometimes feel her come in and give me a kiss during the night when I’m asleep. Old habits die hard, I guess!

I don’t take it personally if my kid doesn't say goodnight. He’s exhausted. Full day of school. Two hours cross country practice, an hour or so of homework, and gaining height and muscle rapidly. He’s beyond exhausted and falls into bed.

It’s also a form of growing independence. But you could always say, “I’d love it if you gave me a chance to say good night before bed!” Maybe your kid doesn’t know you miss this? Let her know.

Fwiw, I don’t always remember to say good night to DH either. I get up an hour or two before him, so am usually in bed 1-2 hours earlier and fall asleep reading.