Call your college student

[Anonymous]

Agree to ignore the goblins.

[Anonymous]

My college freshman is calling me every day and I'm listening plenty... but thanks?

[Anonymous]

I agree that some kids need to be "drawn out" in order for their concerns to come out. And sometimes the concerns are actually pretty serious and warrant the help of an adult, except some kids are too close to the issue to ask for help.

My oldest is like that. I need to ask very specific questions. So even though we usually text, I Facetime with him occasionally, because that's a better medium.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of ridiculous. So a college kid is struggling with a class. That has been going on for decades. This is not special. They can drop the class, get a tutor, fail it, ask to do extra credit, whatever. This shouldn't require a long talk with Mommy and Daddy.

Aren’t you clever? I hope my kids know they can ALWAYS call me for comfort or advice or whatever they need. For so long as I am sentient.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of ridiculous. So a college kid is struggling with a class. That has been going on for decades. This is not special. They can drop the class, get a tutor, fail it, ask to do extra credit, whatever. This shouldn't require a long talk with Mommy and Daddy.

Even if they know their options, they still might have feelings about it and it's totally appropriate and good for children -- even adult children -- to talk about their feelings and worries with their parents.

What do your children tell you? I bet nothing.

This is what college advisors and roommates and friends are for.

What if this happens to be a college freshman, who came to campus knowing nobody, and is still finding their friends group? What if their roommate is the roommate from hell?
You do you and tell your kids to "grow up and not talk to you because they are adults"

The rest of us will listen to and support our kids, and provide feedback if they wish---otherwise we will be a sounding board for them. I'm still a sounding board for my 25 yo---it's called being a good parent and being supportive.

[Anonymous]

This post is insufferable. We are fine. Thanks though. Also…to the poster whose child is calling her daily..end that. Let this child grow up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of ridiculous. So a college kid is struggling with a class. That has been going on for decades. This is not special. They can drop the class, get a tutor, fail it, ask to do extra credit, whatever. This shouldn't require a long talk with Mommy and Daddy.

I'm 49 and I still depend on my mom to just plain listen. She's the only person on earth who will do so with 100% generosity and fascination. It's an immense gift, and one I plan to give my own kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post is insufferable. We are fine. Thanks though. Also…to the poster whose child is calling her daily..end that. Let this child grow up.

Every college girl I know calls her mom daily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is insufferable. We are fine. Thanks though. Also…to the poster whose child is calling her daily..end that. Let this child grow up.

Every college girl I know calls her mom daily.

I’m a 38 year old woman with a husband, a child, a home, and a well developed career. I still talk to my mom every day.

My mom—who is perhaps the most independent person I know—talked to her mom every day until the day my grandma died.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My college freshman is calling me every day and I'm listening plenty... but thanks?

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of ridiculous. So a college kid is struggling with a class. That has been going on for decades. This is not special. They can drop the class, get a tutor, fail it, ask to do extra credit, whatever. This shouldn't require a long talk with Mommy and Daddy.

Even if they know their options, they still might have feelings about it and it's totally appropriate and good for children -- even adult children -- to talk about their feelings and worries with their parents.

What do your children tell you? I bet nothing.

This is what college advisors and roommates and friends are for.

Pp. This is sad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is kind of ridiculous. So a college kid is struggling with a class. That has been going on for decades. This is not special. They can drop the class, get a tutor, fail it, ask to do extra credit, whatever. This shouldn't require a long talk with Mommy and Daddy.

Yeah I can’t imagine calling my parents over something like this, but I can totally see my own kid doing this.

Modern kids are so much closer to their parents and really rely on them for support. I wonder if it’s because their peers are much less helpful than our peers were? I could go to my friends for anything. Parents? Not so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is insufferable. We are fine. Thanks though. Also…to the poster whose child is calling her daily..end that. Let this child grow up.

Every college girl I know calls her mom daily.

I’m a 38 year old woman with a husband, a child, a home, and a well developed career. I still talk to my mom every day.

My mom—who is perhaps the most independent person I know—talked to her mom every day until the day my grandma died.

Emotionally secure people do this. It’s the people whose parents kept them at bay who don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My college student texted something that sounded stressed out. I called them.

We spoke for quite some time, and they shared their worries. They had a situation at work and, while acing several classes, struggle mightily with one subject despite attending study sessions and working with a tutor.

I did my best to put a spotlight on what's going well with most of their classes. Yes, one class is not going well at all. I share this "bad" news to show this kid of mine is not perfect because so many here say they have the perfect kid attending Harvard, etc.

Mostly, I let them speak. Spouse asked if they wanted advice. They said they just wanted to talk, so we didn't give advice.

This might be a good time to reach out to your college students. See how they are. Do your best not to give advice unless they specifically ask for it. Listen to them.

I wish I'd had someone who would have done that for me.

Ary you the same mommy trying to get parents to register their kids to vote Democrat?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post is insufferable. We are fine. Thanks though. Also…to the poster whose child is calling her daily..end that. Let this child grow up.

Every college girl I know calls her mom daily.

Freshman DD and I speak when she has time -- but it's definitely not every day. Probably twice a week, depending on what's going on. I wait for her to call me, but we do text almost every day. She's got 5 classes that are 18 credits because of all the outside work required. Plus 4 hours a week of lab and 10 hours a week of rehearsals (Tech theatre major). We are extremely close, but she's always been extremely busy!