Flaky friend? Why is it so hard for people to communicate…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

This. And it also doesn’t sound like you had confirmed plans.

So what? Having no confirmed plans means you can’t keep someone in the loop?

She didn’t actually want to see him (because he’s a pushy creeper). So she was purposefully not keeping him in the loop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

What does grieving have to do with being respectful and communicating with someone, even a quick text?

You are AWFUL. She is prioritizing her family during a time of grief. YOU never, ever told her you were coming down just to see her or that you were waiting just for her.

You are 100000% out of line. I would never speak to you again and seriously would assume you were a malignant narcissist.

This is one of the craziest things I've ever read on DCUM.

I think OP is the “naively friendly” guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

This. And it also doesn’t sound like you had confirmed plans.

So what? Having no confirmed plans means you can’t keep someone in the loop?

She didn’t actually want to see him (because he’s a pushy creeper). So she was purposefully not keeping him in the loop.

I had wondered if OP was the woman's ex. It reads like a pushy romantic interest and a woman trying to sidestep him.

But, repeatedly saying "it's been a month" about the mom's death makes me think it's just a troll stirring people up. Good thread if so, you got DCUM unanimity.

[Anonymous]

You told her you would be out that way and then you changed your story to say that you came there for her? That was weird and she didn't do anything wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

This. And it also doesn’t sound like you had confirmed plans.

So what? Having no confirmed plans means you can’t keep someone in the loop?

She didn’t actually want to see him (because he’s a pushy creeper). So she was purposefully not keeping him in the loop.

I had wondered if OP was the woman's ex. It reads like a pushy romantic interest and a woman trying to sidestep him.

But, repeatedly saying "it's been a month" about the mom's death makes me think it's just a troll stirring people up. Good thread if so, you got DCUM unanimity.

I’m not her ex. She’s just an old friend I haven’t seen in a while. I keep saying it’s been a month because you all keep saying she “just died” - if her mom had just died I would’ve given her more space for sure. I’m not some jerk who was trying to usurp her time if her mom had just passed away. That’s why I wanted to make the clarification of when she passed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

What does grieving have to do with being respectful and communicating with someone, even a quick text?

NP. Her mother had only just passed away a week prior? What on earth is wrong with you?

No, she passed away in early August.

Oh well in that case, the grieving window has closed, so she should have gone out of her way to accommodate you on a trip she never asked you to take, especially since she hasn't seen you in years. Do you hear yourself? Jeez.

[Anonymous]

TLDR but you are a B!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

This. And it also doesn’t sound like you had confirmed plans.

So what? Having no confirmed plans means you can’t keep someone in the loop?

She didn’t actually want to see him (because he’s a pushy creeper). So she was purposefully not keeping him in the loop.

I had wondered if OP was the woman's ex. It reads like a pushy romantic interest and a woman trying to sidestep him.

But, repeatedly saying "it's been a month" about the mom's death makes me think it's just a troll stirring people up. Good thread if so, you got DCUM unanimity.

I’m not her ex. She’s just an old friend I haven’t seen in a while. I keep saying it’s been a month because you all keep saying she “just died” - if her mom had just died I would’ve given her more space for sure. I’m not some jerk who was trying to usurp her time if her mom had just passed away. That’s why I wanted to make the clarification of when she passed.

DP. OP, the very first sentence of your post states “I hadn’t seen or talked to this friend in many years.” You’re clearly not very close to this person anymore, yet you seem bizarrely insistent on meeting up. You’re came on too strong. We can all sense it from the tone of your posts.

[Anonymous]

This post has one of those plot twists where, once you get into the first few postings, you realize that the "Flakey friend" in the title of the post is actually the OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

This. And it also doesn’t sound like you had confirmed plans.

So what? Having no confirmed plans means you can’t keep someone in the loop?

She didn’t actually want to see him (because he’s a pushy creeper). So she was purposefully not keeping him in the loop.

I had wondered if OP was the woman's ex. It reads like a pushy romantic interest and a woman trying to sidestep him.

But, repeatedly saying "it's been a month" about the mom's death makes me think it's just a troll stirring people up. Good thread if so, you got DCUM unanimity.

I’m not her ex. She’s just an old friend I haven’t seen in a while. I keep saying it’s been a month because you all keep saying she “just died” - if her mom had just died I would’ve given her more space for sure. I’m not some jerk who was trying to usurp her time if her mom had just passed away. That’s why I wanted to make the clarification of when she passed.

You are quite possibly one of the dumbest people I've ever encountered on DCUM, and that's saying something because the bar is really high.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

What does grieving have to do with being respectful and communicating with someone, even a quick text?

NP. Her mother had only just passed away a week prior? What on earth is wrong with you?

No, she passed away in early August.

Oh well in that case, the grieving window has closed, so she should have gone out of her way to accommodate you on a trip she never asked you to take, especially since she hasn't seen you in years. Do you hear yourself? Jeez.

Exactly the same words popped into my head as I was reading.

Early August was five weeks ago. Do you have a mother??

I hope she blocked you.
-np

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re not close, if you haven’t seen her or spoken to her in many years.

And you’re hounding her for an audience after her mother just died?! Shame on you. Her mother just died and you are giving her lectures on “keeping her word”? She is GRIEVING, you moron.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

I’ve seen a lot of crazy on this site, but honestly OP, you are one of the craziest.

If you’re not a troll, you need some serious therapy.

[Anonymous]

Both of you need to be more direct. If you were coming just to see her, you needed to come another time. This weekend was clearly not good for her. She was clear she had a lot going on and you missed all the social cues she was throwing that she was not available.

[Anonymous]

You haven't talked to her in years.
She just lost her mother.
You need people skills.