Are you in love with your spouse after many years?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't feel in love anymore. My spouse is very critical and constantly corrects me. He's also controlling, but I've learned to set boundaries. And I can't remember when he said, "I love you." He complains about a lack of intimacy but can't show kindness or express affirmation. I don't understand how men can complain about physical intimacy but offer no emotional intimacy.

+1

Same here non-emotional, non communicative spouse yet complains about 5ex

[Anonymous]

In love no, but I love my DH and he is a great husband and father. Maybe what we think is in love is just the lust/passion we feel in a new relationship but that has long faded.

[Anonymous]

A lot of women loose interest in their DHs once they are mothers.

[Anonymous]

Yes, but as people always say, it’s a different kind of love than at the lustful beginning. He’s shown up for me and now kids for years and years, and been with me through thick and thin. He looks after all of us and always has our best interests in mind. Nobody in the world knows me better. I love the way he thinks and he’s funny. We’re an excellent team.

Do we want to jump each others’ bones all the time? No. But I’m more comfortable telling him what I like and want than in the beginning, so the quality is better.

[Anonymous]

Yep....... growing old together.

Married 44 years...together 49.

Can't imagine life without her.

[Anonymous]

OP here. My question was if "in love" was possible. Interesting to see so many people say "yes!" and then others say "no the feeling of being in love is not sustainable." I'm so glad some people can sustain it over the years!

[Anonymous]

I’m still in love 25 years later. I can’t imagine my life without him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. It’s not reciprocated, but I love him deeply.

it's hard to live this way. I am in love with DW. Married 24 years and think she is the most beautiful woman on earth. She loves me as the father of her children

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate my wife. I wish I had the courage to divorce her. I pray that I wake up one day and she files for divorce. I have nobody but myself to blame for failing to foresee a psychotic narcissist in the future

Not quite as bad as you have it but pretty damn close. Disappointed in the rational side of my brain for allowing incredible sex to cloud my judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate my wife. I wish I had the courage to divorce her. I pray that I wake up one day and she files for divorce. I have nobody but myself to blame for failing to foresee a psychotic narcissist in the future

Oh for heaven's sake ... why on earth are you waiting for her to file for divorce? Just go ahead and do it yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In love no, do I love him no. But after 31 years together we have been through alot and I'm very comfortable with him and we have a good partnership relathionship with sex thrown in. To be honest he does what I want him to do so why should I leave.

At this point there's certain things that are mutually beneficial for both of us to stay.

This is so gross. And there is no such word as alot.

So desperate to feel superior to someone they go around pointing out spelling/grammatical errors on the internet.

Pretty sure this person doesn't even have a spouse so not sure why they are even on this thread.

[Anonymous]

Yes, married over 20 years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. My question was if "in love" was possible. Interesting to see so many people say "yes!" and then others say "no the feeling of being in love is not sustainable." I'm so glad some people can sustain it over the years!

“In love” is a nebulous term. Is he my favorite person to spend time with? Yes. Do we have as much sex and cuddling/PDA as the beginning. No.

[Anonymous]

I was in love with my ex even before our divorce. He was so cruel to me however I had to leave him. It’s hard to understand why I love him after what he has done to me. Maybe it isn’t love but emotional attachment. What’s the difference though? But I still care and would help in in time of need thougb he objectively wouldn’t deserve that.

[Anonymous]

"In love" as in lust and passion? No.

But love him as my partner in life and as my family? Yes