If you pair well with “alpha” men

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

My husband does all of the bolded and I would not consider him “alpha,” just a regular, decent dude. In fact there are a lot of facets of life where I am in charge and that’s fine with both of us.

Like if you forget your purse is your husband not supposed to cover it? Like what?

[Anonymous]

I'm also pretty alpha and career driven. The alpha men like it -- it allows you to understand each other. And alphas look down on betas, of either sex, really. So alpha and beta don't usually work, no matter the genders.

I could never be attracted to a beta male. I need a man who is at least as smart, attractive, ambitious, competent and confident as I am. Otherwise why bother, I'd be better off on my own.

I've been with DH for a long time. Both of us lawyers. It works well.

[Anonymous]

How can the word “alpha” be dirtier than the words “bill clinton?” He would be the opposite of what I would consider alpha. Of recent presidents, both Obama and Biden, who have actually gone through trials in their life and triumphed, are much closer to what I’d consider an alpha male.

One thing that gets confused with strength is extroversion, though. My DH is an introvert but very protective of his family and very smart and savvy in his line of work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

My husband does all of the bolded and I would not consider him “alpha,” just a regular, decent dude. In fact there are a lot of facets of life where I am in charge and that’s fine with both of us.

Like if you forget your purse is your husband not supposed to cover it? Like what?

Agree. Geez already. Covered if you forgot your purse? Of course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

My husband does all of the bolded and I would not consider him “alpha,” just a regular, decent dude. In fact there are a lot of facets of life where I am in charge and that’s fine with both of us.

Like if you forget your purse is your husband not supposed to cover it? Like what?

Agree. Geez already. Covered if you forgot your purse? Of course.

DP, that part was very confusing to me too. Maybe she’s trying to tell us he pays for everything which would be worthy of note since they aren’t married? But I would expect either party to take care of the other if one was without cash. I guess it’s not feminine that I don’t care and would pay for anyone I cared for in that situation, including my husband?

[Anonymous]

Women here are discussing attraction as being the same as pairing. To me, they’re quite different. Alphas “pair” well with most women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm also pretty alpha and career driven. The alpha men like it -- it allows you to understand each other. And alphas look down on betas, of either sex, really. So alpha and beta don't usually work, no matter the genders.

I could never be attracted to a beta male. I need a man who is at least as smart, attractive, ambitious, competent and confident as I am. Otherwise why bother, I'd be better off on my own.

I've been with DH for a long time. Both of us lawyers. It works well.

As a lawyer, lawyer couples baffle me. I have no desire to go home with co- or god forbid opposing counsel!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’m just using the term because it’s popular now. I’m referring to men who like to take on the traditional male gender role….ambitious, stoic, dominant, are some adjectives that come to mind.

You can be ambitious without being an emotional a-hole.

[Anonymous]

I was in my 20s & 30s because I was also pretty "alpha" - extremely ambitious, athletic, and competitive. I found those types of guys were extremely attracted to me because I presented a challenge.

Now, LTR/marriage....whole other thing. They don't like when your ambition and drive clashes with their's. I was married to one and our #1 source of conflict was we both wanted to put 100% into our careers and neither of us would budge, and competing with each other turned from flirtatious to bitter & resentful.

But, you really can't win either way. I work with a lot of "alpha" men, they all complain about their SAHM wives and wish they had married someone like me. And I'm like, guys, you couldn't handle it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

My husband does all of the bolded and I would not consider him “alpha,” just a regular, decent dude. In fact there are a lot of facets of life where I am in charge and that’s fine with both of us.

Like if you forget your purse is your husband not supposed to cover it? Like what?

+1

My husband holds doors open for me and he's always the one who pays (with our joint credit card) when we go out. He generally drives if we're in the same car. He's kind and thoughtful. He would jump in front of me if someone pulled a gun on us. But I would never call him an alpha because that would make him sound like a dick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm also pretty alpha and career driven. The alpha men like it -- it allows you to understand each other. And alphas look down on betas, of either sex, really. So alpha and beta don't usually work, no matter the genders.

I could never be attracted to a beta male. I need a man who is at least as smart, attractive, ambitious, competent and confident as I am. Otherwise why bother, I'd be better off on my own.

I've been with DH for a long time. Both of us lawyers. It works well.

As a lawyer, lawyer couples baffle me. I have no desire to go home with co- or god forbid opposing counsel!

As a lawyer, I agree with you. My husband is an engineer and we get along fabulously. I don't think I'd want to be married to another lawyer!

[Anonymous]

Women are contradictory creatures that's all I have to say. They want one thing but do another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

DCUM ladies, listen to this woman.

Well said. That’s what an “alpha” dominant male does. He isn’t a pushover. He takes the lead. He is trustworthy. His woman feel comfortable following him. He protects her, takes care of her. He initiates and dominates her in bed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm also pretty alpha and career driven. The alpha men like it -- it allows you to understand each other. And alphas look down on betas, of either sex, really. So alpha and beta don't usually work, no matter the genders.

I could never be attracted to a beta male. I need a man who is at least as smart, attractive, ambitious, competent and confident as I am. Otherwise why bother, I'd be better off on my own.

I've been with DH for a long time. Both of us lawyers. It works well.

As a lawyer, lawyer couples baffle me. I have no desire to go home with co- or god forbid opposing counsel!

It's good that they're together and not out there separately hurting other people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Im a professionally successful woman, I was married for a decade to a “beta male”. I was in charge and he followed along. Clearly that didn’t work as we are no longer married. The professional environment in which I thrive is not the same in which I thrive personally.

I am now dating a man who you probably consider “alpha”. He just makes sure stuff gets done. He is as liberal politically as I am, and doesnt see me as a second class citizen at all. But he views it as his job to make sure Im good. Im safe. Im taken care of. Same with my kids, his kids, his parents and younger siblings, etc. He does things for me that I could do myself. He makes my life easier. To use the tik tok parlance that “alpha male” comes from, I am a passenger princess. He holds doors and carries heavy things and pushes the cart in the grocery store. I can go out with him without a purse and be fine (lack of makeup for a touchup aside) because he can take care of whatever I need. He is the head of the household and takes that responsibility very seriously. And he absolutely dominates me in bed, in a very consensual, safe manner.

10/10, highly recommend men who are “men”.

DCUM ladies, listen to this woman.

Well said. That’s what an “alpha” dominant male does. He isn’t a pushover. He takes the lead. He is trustworthy. His woman feel comfortable following him. He protects her, takes care of her. He initiates and dominates her in bed.

Where do I find a man like that, PP?