My boyfriend steals groceries

[Anonymous]

I don’t think you need to worry about arrest for this but you can’t keep dating someone this morally…flexible? Confused? This is absolutely not the worst thing he already does or will eventually justify to himself. Don’t be there to find out what the worst thing is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I scan something once or twice and it doesn’t pick up I sometimes put it in my bag without trying again.

You can just ask the attendant, they usually just give it to you anyway.

[Anonymous]

When I was in grad school and poor, I'd ring up my pink lady apples as red delicious, because they were cheaper. But I never outright stole any apples.

I certainly stopped doing that once I earned an income after graduating.

Your boyfriend is a criminal. If he thinks it's ok to steal from a grocery store, I wonder what kind of excuses he makes in the rest of his life. People who are unethical are generally unethical in their whole life, not just one thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think he meant to say, "most unethical men do this." It would be a dealbreaker for me, but then I care about honesty.

+1

Not sure where you shop. I cannot check out at my Bethesda Giant without have the bells go off for using my own bags (needing an employees override to continue), swiping multiple items of same kind, one at a time, and so on. It is seriously a PITA. Now I know why it's so sensitive, b/c of people stealing in plain site at the self checkout.

[Anonymous]

You better get an iron clad prenup.

[Anonymous]

I am a man and I do not do this.

that said, there have been a few times where an item just won't ring up, and the attendant is MIA and I just throw that product into my cart.

But that has only happened a few times

[Anonymous]

I mean . . . this is a HUGE red flag (putting aside the criminality of it). He's being dishonest and amoral. And engaging in the sort of thinking that shows he justifies things in the light most favorable to him.

Guaranteed: this is not the only immoral or unethical thing he does. It's not the only dishonest thing he does. It will not be the first time he tries to discount others' feelings/policies to justify his behavior.

Eventually, it will be directed to you in some way shape or form. That would be my fear.

[Anonymous]

Not normal, and no- most men do not do this. Can you imagine the embarrassment if he got caught? Cringe. And he likely will eventually.

[Anonymous]

My husband doesn't do this. If I were you, I'd break up with that boyfriend over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NO they do not. If this man’s moral compass permits him steal, there is no telling what awful things he is capable of doing to you, others, children, or the elderly. Run!!!

End it, OP. I hope you have not moved in, comingled funds, etc. This is a huge red flag. Do you have kids?

[Anonymous]

My DH works corporate in big box retail, and no, he would never steal.

So, yeah, retailers “know” that people are stealing and account for it in many ways. It’s part of why prices go up. It’s also why many employees in high theft stores will never get special thinks like profit sharing bonuses.

So yeah, stick it to the man, but also stick it to the 500 low wage workers *in your community* who won’t be eligible for bonuses due to theft in their area. Way to make a stand!

Oh wait, this was about your boyfriend.

Do you really want to be with someone like this ? Theft is theft. He thinks he’s being smart, but retailers are becoming smarter. You want to be associated with the guy who steals yogurt he doesn’t need to steal? To me, this shows a lack of character in so many ways I associated with the yogurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are with him and he gets caught you are both getting arrested.

No, most men don't do this. I would never be with someone who is this off morally but also this stupid. Getting arrested over $50?

This.

Do you have kids, OP? Why would you want this kind of person in their lives as a role model of anti-social behavior?

[Anonymous]

Most people don’t. The people who do are scumbags and that’s why they’re closing down self checkouts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH works corporate in big box retail, and no, he would never steal.

So, yeah, retailers “know” that people are stealing and account for it in many ways. It’s part of why prices go up. It’s also why many employees in high theft stores will never get special thinks like profit sharing bonuses.

So yeah, stick it to the man, but also stick it to the 500 low wage workers *in your community* who won’t be eligible for bonuses due to theft in their area. Way to make a stand!

Oh wait, this was about your boyfriend.

Do you really want to be with someone like this ? Theft is theft. He thinks he’s being smart, but retailers are becoming smarter. You want to be associated with the guy who steals yogurt he doesn’t need to steal? To me, this shows a lack of character in so many ways I associated with the yogurt.

What?

[Anonymous]

Op, you are choosing this man. You have decided that he is a good choice as the future Father of your children. You are hoping they look up to him, and are like him. You have a choice Op.