Be honest. Would you marry a guy making $160K at 55?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

dp.. yes, your friends sound horribly judgemental and snobby if you think they will be judgy about his income.

Think of how hard it will be for him to acclimate to the classy folk OP is concerned with! We don’t want him to be the Ruprecht from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels in this elite social group, it won’t do in Courcheval or on Richard Brandon’s next private island retreat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Pretty lame that you’re only top 5%. How much did your ex earn? Is his younger, pretty lover top 3%, or just the reason he’s able to smile and have sexual desire and fun these days?

I know you’re joking but I do consider myself a slacker who should be earning more. Ex makes $600k+ and is unpartnered. At that income though I wouldn’t care what a partner earns.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Or you could stop evaluating people by their salaries. Find people with interesting conversation. People with values, a sense of humor, a passion for something other than expensive shit.

If that means finding new friends, wouldn’t you rather do that now than when circumstances change outside of your control? Have you learned nothing from reading this forum? Layoffs, health crises, market losses… do you think that can’t happen to you? Building your life and your personality around money is just so incredibly risky.

Everyone I associate with is interesting and has built their lives around meaningful work that makes a positive difference in the world. They just earn a lot doing it. It’s a myth that wealthy people are somehow always superficial and fatuous.

It’s exceedingly unlikely meaningful work in the way you intend yields tippety-top income here, and most of us can acknowledge that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Or you could stop evaluating people by their salaries. Find people with interesting conversation. People with values, a sense of humor, a passion for something other than expensive shit.

If that means finding new friends, wouldn’t you rather do that now than when circumstances change outside of your control? Have you learned nothing from reading this forum? Layoffs, health crises, market losses… do you think that can’t happen to you? Building your life and your personality around money is just so incredibly risky.

Everyone I associate with is interesting and has built their lives around meaningful work that makes a positive difference in the world. They just earn a lot doing it. It’s a myth that wealthy people are somehow always superficial and fatuous.

But you (assuming you’re OP) were worried about your friends judging him for his inferior income.

Both things can be true. There are many many affluent people who are excellent virtue signalers who also care deeply about money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Pretty lame that you’re only top 5%. How much did your ex earn? Is his younger, pretty lover top 3%, or just the reason he’s able to smile and have sexual desire and fun these days?

I know you’re joking but I do consider myself a slacker who should be earning more. Ex makes $600k+ and is unpartnered. At that income though I wouldn’t care what a partner earns.

If your love is 55, how old are you? What a depressing perspective you’ve shared!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

dp.. yes, your friends sound horribly judgemental and snobby if you think they will be judgy about his income.

Think of how hard it will be for him to acclimate to the classy folk OP is concerned with! We don’t want him to be the Ruprecht from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels in this elite social group, it won’t do in Courcheval or on Richard Brandon’s next private island retreat.

OP. I said 1% not 0.1%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Or you could stop evaluating people by their salaries. Find people with interesting conversation. People with values, a sense of humor, a passion for something other than expensive shit.

If that means finding new friends, wouldn’t you rather do that now than when circumstances change outside of your control? Have you learned nothing from reading this forum? Layoffs, health crises, market losses… do you think that can’t happen to you? Building your life and your personality around money is just so incredibly risky.

Everyone I associate with is interesting and has built their lives around meaningful work that makes a positive difference in the world. They just earn a lot doing it. It’s a myth that wealthy people are somehow always superficial and fatuous.

But you (assuming you’re OP) were worried about your friends judging him for his inferior income.

Agreed. People that judge others by their income are NOT making a positive difference in the world, just the opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

dp.. yes, your friends sound horribly judgemental and snobby if you think they will be judgy about his income.

Think of how hard it will be for him to acclimate to the classy folk OP is concerned with! We don’t want him to be the Ruprecht from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels in this elite social group, it won’t do in Courcheval or on Richard Brandon’s next private island retreat.

OP. I said 1% not 0.1%.

Yes, you’ve got your head on straight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

dp.. yes, your friends sound horribly judgemental and snobby if you think they will be judgy about his income.

Think of how hard it will be for him to acclimate to the classy folk OP is concerned with! We don’t want him to be the Ruprecht from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels in this elite social group, it won’t do in Courcheval or on Richard Brandon’s next private island retreat.

OP. I said 1% not 0.1%.

Yes, you’ve got your head on straight.

Well if you’re familiar with the curve, there is a logarithmic difference between what I’m describing and the lifestyles you’re imagining.

[Anonymous]

That's more than I make at 55, so yes.

What a weird question. So sorry you even thought it was important to ask it. You must have a terrible social circle if this is an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Or you could stop evaluating people by their salaries. Find people with interesting conversation. People with values, a sense of humor, a passion for something other than expensive shit.

If that means finding new friends, wouldn’t you rather do that now than when circumstances change outside of your control? Have you learned nothing from reading this forum? Layoffs, health crises, market losses… do you think that can’t happen to you? Building your life and your personality around money is just so incredibly risky.

Everyone I associate with is interesting and has built their lives around meaningful work that makes a positive difference in the world. They just earn a lot doing it. It’s a myth that wealthy people are somehow always superficial and fatuous.

It’s exceedingly unlikely meaningful work in the way you intend yields tippety-top income here, and most of us can acknowledge that.

My career is in humanitarian assistance and I’ve worked for orgs of all sizes. The CEO never made more than $600k, even at the giant global groups. And there are only a handful of those people.

What else could be considered meaningful work that makes a positive difference? Teaching? Medical research?

No, the big bucks are for corporate types, hedge fund managers, etc. Hardly a positive effect on the world. I’d rather live on ramen than harvest wealth from the least fortunate.

[Anonymous]

DO you realize that the average salary in the US for someone in the 55-64 bracket is around $63K? $160k is more than double that.
Yes, I married someone making less than that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A guy who checks all the boxes but is only in the top 10% of earners?!? Kick him to the curb OP and make sure he knows that you’re a 1% gal.

Christ on a cracker you’re horrible

Well yes, I was married to a 1% guy and am top 5% myself. Most of my friends and family are 1%ers so I have a distorted perspective. I am proud to be with him. However, he will be the lowest earning of all my circle’s male spouses and I don’t want him or me to feel judged or out of place when we socialize. I guess we could find new friends who are less wealthy.

Or you could stop evaluating people by their salaries. Find people with interesting conversation. People with values, a sense of humor, a passion for something other than expensive shit.

If that means finding new friends, wouldn’t you rather do that now than when circumstances change outside of your control? Have you learned nothing from reading this forum? Layoffs, health crises, market losses… do you think that can’t happen to you? Building your life and your personality around money is just so incredibly risky.

Everyone I associate with is interesting and has built their lives around meaningful work that makes a positive difference in the world. They just earn a lot doing it. It’s a myth that wealthy people are somehow always superficial and fatuous.

It’s exceedingly unlikely meaningful work in the way you intend yields tippety-top income here, and most of us can acknowledge that.

My career is in humanitarian assistance and I’ve worked for orgs of all sizes. The CEO never made more than $600k, even at the giant global groups. And there are only a handful of those people.

What else could be considered meaningful work that makes a positive difference? Teaching? Medical research?

No, the big bucks are for corporate types, hedge fund managers, etc. Hardly a positive effect on the world. I’d rather live on ramen than harvest wealth from the least fortunate.

OP. There are plenty of roles outside of hedge fund managers that make money. And yes at this point most friends have ascended to be prominent professionals, entrepreneurs, heads of organizations or quite high up in their fields.

[Anonymous]

Gold digger

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DO you realize that the average salary in the US for someone in the 55-64 bracket is around $63K? $160k is more than double that.
Yes, I married someone making less than that.

This isn’t a useful data point in the context of assertive mating among college or professional degree-educated people.