How often do you offer or pay for your nanny's lunch/coffee?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The nanny is probably grossly underpaid and overworked, otherwise she would not even accept this "charity"

Yes. OP should show some charity and promote her to former acquaintance, not employee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

PP can do what she wants, she’s an adult with disposable income. Why on earth would you care if someone buys their lunch or makes it??? Very odd and judgy of you. What’s your point / angle here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I agree. I hardly ever buy lunch out but I know plenty of people who buy out during the work week on most days.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

PP can do what she wants, she’s an adult with disposable income. Why on earth would you care if someone buys their lunch or makes it??? Very odd and judgy of you. What’s your point / angle here?

[Anonymous]

It’s very nice of you to even offer to bring her anything and it’s a shame she takes advantage with fancy drinks. She might think that money doesn’t mean that much to you, which isn’t right, obviously. Awkward situation but I would only offer a few times a month at most, if you even want to do that. When I was a nanny I was always touched when my boss would think of me and bring me something back to their home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

How would you know what kind of takeout she orders? It could be a mediterranean diet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

you are so penny pinching, then you should make your lunch. It saves money for the household and at the same time you don’t feel guilty about marching out with no return lunch/coffee.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

How would you know what kind of takeout she orders? It could be a mediterranean diet.

Doubtful.

[Anonymous]

Our nanny eats our food for breakfast and lunch every day. We’re not counting pennies .

[Anonymous]

I wouldn’t tell her where you’re going except maybe once a week.

[Anonymous]

That’s not a reasonable expense any more. Can you bring a reusable mug so she doesn’t know where it’s from? Even if you just transfer it in the car.

Or if you go say your friend treated you or something

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

Lol ok. 99% of the time I order a Sweetgreen salad. And to the other poster who was clutching their pearls about the cost - I can afford it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

Lol ok. 99% of the time I order a Sweetgreen salad. And to the other poster who was clutching their pearls about the cost - I can afford it.

You’re spending $15 on a salad everyday and complaining you can’t afford coffee for the nanny?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It really depends on your relationship with your nanny, and your nanny's personality.

I've had nannies who were super professional and would be touched by a thoughtful coffee now and then, but who would never even notice me walking in with my own coffee - they were too busy with their own duties. We had clear boundaries.

I also had a nanny who was young, very into Starbucks (like she thought it was SO COOL and a status symbol or whatever). She absolutely would've noticed my coffee cups, and would've taken to heart if I didn't get her a cup. She'd probably pout if I continually excluded her from my Starbies trips. She had less boundaries. With her I probably would've always gotten her a cup and chalked up the price of doing business with this particular nanny / trying to keep her happy.

But yeah in general if you have good boundaries, I think it's crazy to always get her a cup. Like in the professional world, I can't imagine always having to get my secretary or colleagues a cup of coffee every time I went to Starbucks. Every once in a while is a kind gesture, but boundaries man.

+1 i think it depends on your nanny and your relationship. I get lunch and coffee way too often for it to be feasible for me to offer to get something for her. I get takeout lunch because then I’m not in the kitchen while she’s giving the kids lunch and because it’s one less thing I have to think about - thank you, door dash. I have never offered to get her lunch because it feels like it wouldn’t be appropriate for our relationship.

She’s paid very well, gets a generous holiday bonus + very nice/thoughtful gifts for her birthday and Christmas, and we strive to be courteous employers by keeping our house really clean and treating her like a professional.

make your lunch! Geez.

This. It’s super unhealthy to eat takeout every day.

Lazy too