I HATE the suburbs and have a chance to leave. This is long..more experienced parents help?

[Anonymous]

2-3 generations ago families with 4+ kids were living in 2-bed apartments in Chicago. Part of my family is from Chicago and they grew up there in the 60s/70s. 5 kids in a 2-bed. Bunk beds were in the dining room for the boys and the girls had the second bedroom.

When you live in the city you “live in the city” not so much in your home. So many people posting on this board are not familiar with what it’s like to raise families in a real city because so much of DC-proper is more suburban than compared to New York/Chicago.

Go for it OP. Your kids are young and now is a great time to take advantage of this move. And you can’t put a price on being closer to your grandparents.

I think renting your current place (at least for a few years is ideal). And taking the savings and investing will pay off so much in the future for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Location trumps everything, always. This is not a permanent choice. Frankly, your cons don't seem like deal breakers and might have alternatives. Can you rent your suburban home?

This is the solution I came up with too. Since you want to save your interest rate, this is the way to do it. You will never regret spending time with relatives you have a good relationship with.

[Anonymous]

Chicagoan here who lives in the city with my DH and 11-year-old who is in sixth grade. I could tell from your post (2 flat!) you were from this area.

We lived in a 2B/2BA condo (8 unit building/about 1200 sq feet/Lincoln Square neighborhood) until she was in second grade and then moved to Old Irving Park, which is a neighborhood on the NW side with primarily single family homes but is close to the blue line/metra/highway so is easy to get all over the city.

Do it but make a plan to move to a bigger living area once your kids get older. That space will work with them now but unless you are all prepared to do it for the long haul it's going to be tight quarters, particularly if you and your partner work from home. You may or may not be able to stay at you CPS school, some of the principals will let kids stay even if they are out of neighborhood boundaries. Or try the lottery for magnet now to see what you get for next year and then you can stay as long as you stay in Chicago.

The high school situation is complicated. We are willing to pay for Catholic school but she will still need to test, and I would love if she tested into a public. Our neighborhood HS is not an option but plenty of her friends' siblings are at SEHS.

City kids move and switch schools I think more frequently than other kids. We saw a big influx of kids before fourth and fifth grade at my DD's large Catholic school, and then about 6-8 left before middle schools, many of those for the suburbs or moving out of state because they didn't want to deal with the high school situation.

This is rambling, and I'm happy to answer questions, but long story short - I write as a person with a 606 zip code who loves living in the city. We are friends with so many city families and it's a really wonderful place to live.

[Anonymous]

Chicagoan here again...if you want to live in the city, then live in the city. There are plenty of families here who are really thriving despite some challenges you don't have in the suburbs. But the trade offs are worth it!

[Anonymous]

I have the same question as some others: Is it possible to someday buy the grandparents' house? Overall, I'm in favor of your idea. But you might be having a bit of grass-is-always-greener thinking.

We moved from a great urban neighborhood to a suburb and I didn't really start making friends until my oldest was in kindergarten. The first couple of years were rough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My kids are upper elementary. Here's something to consider since yours are still little...I think the suburb benefits are much greater as your kids get older. The importance of good schools increases and all the opportunities for ECs. And your kids will get busy with all their stuff that you won't have as much opportunity to take advantage of all the city stuff anyways. Having space in your home also becomes much more important as kids get older. Your kids will start to make friendships through school...maybe that will help you in that regard too. You'll be done with car seats soon enough. Etc. I loved having little ones in the city; now I'm glad we are where we are.

Chicagoan (again) - I'm not sure what ECs they have in the suburbs that they don't have in the city. Like literally anything you can think of wanting your kid to do you could do in the city. For some things like club volleyball I know girls who are going to close suburbs so I guess there is that.

My DD has sleepovers in friends' homes who live in condos, a $2.5 million city home, two flats with renters living below, it's all over the map. They walk to the park to hang out and play at this age (older kids). You don't need a suburban home and yard to have kids come over and play. You need to be willing to host and creative with your space.

In our old condo building, our neighbors have lived there since their kids were babies. Kids are now a junior in high school and a seventh grader.

It's not for everyone and we were on the north shore over the weekend and love oohing and ahhing at the huge homes. But that's not the only way to raise a family so if you want something different, I say go for it!

[Anonymous]

Also from chicago. Move and don’t look back. I actually think chicago has more schooling options than alot of other major cities. People make it work and you won’t have to decide for a while.

[Anonymous]

Chicagoan here. We live in Lincoln Park and our kids (5yo and 8yo) go to our neighborhood CPS school. I love raising my kids in the city and I know that I would be miserable in the suburbs for the same reasons as you. Don’t discount how significant your happiness is in terms of being the best parent and spouse you can be to your family. Yes, CPS is a beast (as are all large, urban public school districts), but it is totally manageable. And for me, it is absolutely worth it for the benefits of living in the city (last weekend, we took the L to the Loop and explored the Harold Washington Library, followed by brunch; the weekend after next we’re going to a children’s performance at the symphony). We grocery shop European style (walking to the store to get the ingredients we need day by day). We have one car that sits idle most of the time. We don’t have a yard, but we truly consider the city’s parks our backyard. I love exploring all the different neighborhood festivals, museums and, of course, restaurants. I’m excited to raise my children to constantly engage with this amazing city. Are there downsides? Absolutely — CPS class sizes are large, higher rates of crime compared to elsewhere, having a smaller home than we would otherwise have, etc. It just really comes down to your values and priorities. Good luck with this decision!

[Anonymous]

Op sitting here reading every response and literally tearing up. I hate it here so much. Thanks to all the Chicagoans for chiming in.

[Anonymous]

Sorry, PP poster here who lives in Chicago. Thinking of the last few months we have gone downtown to run the Hot Chocolate 5K, gone to Hamilton with 25 other kids and parents, rented skis for the season in Logan Square, gone out to eat in Bucktown, Wicker Park, Lakeview and Lincoln Park, where my daughter discovered mochinut doughnuts across from where her youth orchestra plays, trick or treated through the city streets in North Center, been to several fall block parties.

All of this stuff is so easy for us. Like it's not a big trip to head downtown and go do things. We are always doing things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op sitting here reading every response and literally tearing up. I hate it here so much. Thanks to all the Chicagoans for chiming in.

So curious what suburb? LaGrange?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op sitting here reading every response and literally tearing up. I hate it here so much. Thanks to all the Chicagoans for chiming in.

So curious what suburb? LaGrange?

Mount Prospect

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My kids are upper elementary. Here's something to consider since yours are still little...I think the suburb benefits are much greater as your kids get older. The importance of good schools increases and all the opportunities for ECs. And your kids will get busy with all their stuff that you won't have as much opportunity to take advantage of all the city stuff anyways. Having space in your home also becomes much more important as kids get older. Your kids will start to make friendships through school...maybe that will help you in that regard too. You'll be done with car seats soon enough. Etc. I loved having little ones in the city; now I'm glad we are where we are.

Chicagoan (again) - I'm not sure what ECs they have in the suburbs that they don't have in the city. Like literally anything you can think of wanting your kid to do you could do in the city. For some things like club volleyball I know girls who are going to close suburbs so I guess there is that.

My DD has sleepovers in friends' homes who live in condos, a $2.5 million city home, two flats with renters living below, it's all over the map. They walk to the park to hang out and play at this age (older kids). You don't need a suburban home and yard to have kids come over and play. You need to be willing to host and creative with your space.

In our old condo building, our neighbors have lived there since their kids were babies. Kids are now a junior in high school and a seventh grader.

It's not for everyone and we were on the north shore over the weekend and love oohing and ahhing at the huge homes. But that's not the only way to raise a family so if you want something different, I say go for it!

There are A LOT of suburbanites on this forum. They don’t get the desire to stay in cities to raise families. And DC is very much a city where the ideal is to spend your young fun days downtown and then once you have kids make a run for the suburbs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op sitting here reading every response and literally tearing up. I hate it here so much. Thanks to all the Chicagoans for chiming in.

So curious what suburb? LaGrange?

Mount Prospect

Where friendliness is a way of life!

[Anonymous]

I’m confused about the market value of the unit and building relative to your current house.