Please give it to me straight, no chaser

[Anonymous]

Everyone on LinkedIn is not beautiful. They’ve all paid for professional headshots or they’re using an app to touch up their headshots. Trust me— I’m often shocked at the difference between the LinkedIn version and the in-person version.

[Anonymous]

I don't think therapy is always the answer. I think you may want to do some soul searching. Less emotions, more practical thinking and figure out the approach if baby steps for a way out. Maybe it's working on your appearance or maybe it's a PT gig. Baby steps, success breeds success. Let me tell you that my 20s weee spectacular, I was really happy. Socially, professionally, financially. I'm 50 with 2 wonderful kids and husband but more a mess than I was in my 20s. I didn't take the time to figure things out long term. It's much easier to be a mess in your 20s than 50 for sure. My options are limited but yours are not. Take a breath and just go slow. You have at least a decade to figure it out as life is long. Even if you don't get your shit together until 35 you are still OK. You're gonna be working till you're 65 so think about it from that perspective lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this my anxiety lying to me?
How can I change this narrative in my head?

Yes it is.
Are you on social media? How do you spend your time?

Which social media are you on, OP ?

Twitter, youtube.
Occasionally linkedin , its like im stabbing myself and twisting the knife on linkedin. Torturing myself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound depressed. Talk to your Dr about starting an SSRI and try therapy.

Straight to meds is your advice? I think OP should start with talk therapy before medicating herself.

[Anonymous]

You sound like a classic case of social anxiety, comparing yourself to others. It took me longer to reach adult milestones. Society is messed up and makes you feel like if you aren't doing what it seems like others are doing that there is something wrong with you, when there's nothing wrong with you. Don't pay attention to what the "majority" of people are doing or what they are putting forward on social media which is usually fake or embellished. Lots of people feel worthless but it doesn't mean you actually are. Yes, your anxiety is telling you lies. I'm sure you have potential. It probably also doesn't help that you and your mother are stressing each other out. Perhaps you need counseling but not many counselors are good at understanding what it's really like to have social anxiety. At least try self help books and get some independence from your mother.

[Anonymous]

Also it is never too late. You have your whole life. Everything is a bell curve. If you feel like a freak and out of sync with others your age, there are tons of people right on either side of you in the same position. Give yourself credit. Think of your strengths, not your weaknesses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I’m really sensitive and dramatic (not on purpose). I catastrophize everything in my head and make it worse than it is. When it comes to everything.

I’m in my early twenties and I feel lost. Lost in life, no friendships, no social life. I don’t have a path.

My mother really screams/argues with me because of this. I’m not mad at her, I get it. But because of this sort of reaction that I’m getting (tough love), I feel like my life is over.

Is this my anxiety lying to me? I mean I genuinely believe my life is effed forever.

Yesterday I went on Linkedin just to see something and I ended up scrolling and comparing myself to people my age and younger. I was miserable afterwards. Doesn’t help that every single person on Linkedin is stunning either.
I just feel like crap and keep thinking that I would kill myself if it wasn’t for my family.

I feel like no one else is messing up, I feel like everyone has this perfect path and I deserve to die and that I’m worthless.
How can I change this narrative in my head?

Yes, stop being this way. It’s exhausting for you and everyone around you.

You’re in your early 20’s…unless you’ve murdered someone, there is nothing that can’t be turned around. You can trust my opinion because I don’t care enough about you to lie. Get on some anxiety meds and go fix your life.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the help everyone. I appreciate it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I’m really sensitive and dramatic (not on purpose). I catastrophize everything in my head and make it worse than it is. When it comes to everything.

I’m in my early twenties and I feel lost. Lost in life, no friendships, no social life. I don’t have a path.

My mother really screams/argues with me because of this. I’m not mad at her, I get it. But because of this sort of reaction that I’m getting (tough love), I feel like my life is over.

Is this my anxiety lying to me? I mean I genuinely believe my life is effed forever.

Yesterday I went on Linkedin just to see something and I ended up scrolling and comparing myself to people my age and younger. I was miserable afterwards. Doesn’t help that every single person on Linkedin is stunning either.
I just feel like crap and keep thinking that I would kill myself if it wasn’t for my family.

I feel like no one else is messing up, I feel like everyone has this perfect path and I deserve to die and that I’m worthless.
How can I change this narrative in my head?

Yes, stop being this way. It’s exhausting for you and everyone around you.

You’re in your early 20’s…unless you’ve murdered someone, there is nothing that can’t be turned around. You can trust my opinion because I don’t care enough about you to lie. Get on some anxiety meds and go fix your life.

So the girls in the news jamie komoroski who killed a bride in a DUI, her life is over? Or killing someone in an accident?

[Anonymous]

Delete the SM accounts immediately. You are wasting time losing sleep and getting depressed bc of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
I’m really sensitive and dramatic (not on purpose). I catastrophize everything in my head and make it worse than it is. When it comes to everything.

I’m in my early twenties and I feel lost. Lost in life, no friendships, no social life. I don’t have a path.

My mother really screams/argues with me because of this. I’m not mad at her, I get it. But because of this sort of reaction that I’m getting (tough love), I feel like my life is over.

Is this my anxiety lying to me? I mean I genuinely believe my life is effed forever.

Yesterday I went on Linkedin just to see something and I ended up scrolling and comparing myself to people my age and younger. I was miserable afterwards. Doesn’t help that every single person on Linkedin is stunning either.
I just feel like crap and keep thinking that I would kill myself if it wasn’t for my family.

I feel like no one else is messing up, I feel like everyone has this perfect path and I deserve to die and that I’m worthless.
How can I change this narrative in my head?

Yes, stop being this way. It’s exhausting for you and everyone around you.

You’re in your early 20’s…unless you’ve murdered someone, there is nothing that can’t be turned around. You can trust my opinion because I don’t care enough about you to lie. Get on some anxiety meds and go fix your life.

So the girls in the news jamie komoroski who killed a bride in a DUI, her life is over? Or killing someone in an accident?

Tf is wrong with you

[Anonymous]

Please call 988.

It is free, and they are trained to help you get a better perspective on your life.

In the meantime, stay off Social Media. Linked In is a place where people SELECTIVELY post achievements (that they can describe however they see fit).

They are trying to impress prospective employers. It leaves off all negative aspects of their life/past (which everyone has), and probably exaggerates the positive aspects.

You are fine, yet also flawed LIKE ALL OF US.

Please call 988, and hear their take on things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please call 988.

It is free, and they are trained to help you get a better perspective on your life.

In the meantime, stay off Social Media. Linked In is a place where people SELECTIVELY post achievements (that they can describe however they see fit).

They are trying to impress prospective employers. It leaves off all negative aspects of their life/past (which everyone has), and probably exaggerates the positive aspects.

You are fine, yet also flawed LIKE ALL OF US.

Please call 988, and hear their take on things.

Jeff said OP is Swedish posting from Sweden.

[Anonymous]

Echoing others to say go straight to CBT. I did regular therapy for years and it wasn't until I learned about CBT that I changed my life. You can read books and podcasts on it (many life coach podcasts focus on it like The Life Coach School -- listen from the beginning).

Some of us just have low level depression, so learn how to manage it. Also, thinking back to my 20s, 3 decades ago, I wish I had learned that action is better than thought. It really serves me well to act and then be curious about the results, rather than analyze everything to death.

Change your LinkedIn profile, surround yourself with supportive people, build your self-trust by not flaking on yourself. Walk outdoors, get a coffee, read a book -- whatever energizes you.

You've got this.

[Anonymous]

Also, PLEASE tell your mom she isn't helping. As soon as she starts, remind her of that.