^^PP here. Forgot to mention that we still allow DS to spit stuff out when he tries something new but doesn't like it. As he got older, we encouraged him to try to swallow it rather than spit it out but the goal was to create conditions that encouraged/didn't punish him for trying something new. We were clear about when spitting it out was appropriate and when it wasn't (like at a restaurant/party/etc.). We never had issues with him doing it when it was not appropriate to do so. |
I think PP's point is that, if your child has a disability, advice like "cook a nice meal" stopped being helpful years ago. If you have a typical picky eater and hadn't thought yet to serve them a grown up meat dish, that's fine. But it's not a discussion that belongs in the special needs forum. |
| Also would appreciate a recommendation for an SLP or OT in NoVa, preferably Arlington, Falls Church, Alexandria city for 14 YO. I believe time will help with the picky eating, and already pick my battles and work with what we have, but the sensory aspects of the presence of certain foods is becoming harder to navigate as DC gets older and will be in more social situations in HS and life generally. Seems like a OT/maybe SLP could drill into this with some exposure therapy and digging into the anxiety/OCD-like issues with this aspect of the food issues. Thanks. |
+1000 My favorite piece of unhelpful advice was for my husband and I to eat healthy foods "with gusto"...
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Such BS. I’m a PP with an ARFID kid. I have medical food restrictions so I eat large portions of fruits and vegetables at every meal, protein and whole grains. That’s all my stomach condition can tolerate. My kid has watched me eat 3 meals like this since she was born. I don’t know if I eat it “with gusto” (lol) but it has not “rubbed off” on my kid whatsoever. |
Word. So beyond a common-sense approach. I gave up on pressure and even joint meals long ago because I was making everyone crazy. But now with DS13 starting puberty, I'm worried that we're missing the window to help change or add foods like ANY vegetable. He eats one fruit. He doesn't even eat pasta or rice. I think there has to be a desire to change, but I'm experimenting with the idea that I can pay him to incentivize trying new foods while I still have some time to influence his eating. Would also love a recommendation for an SLP that understands dyspraxia as I think that's part of his issue. |
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I was that kid, my DD was that kid.
Is your child growing? Vitamin deficient? Focus on health, not quantity of food. Accomodate the pickiness. Talk to the Dr about your concerns and follow her advice. I had a good experience with Advanced Peds in Vienna, VA. |
| What happens if she gets 3 or 4 hours of exercise in a day? Does she eat then? Maybe try going on long hikes or bike rides every weekend to see if that stimulates her appetite. |
You are so naive. This child has ADHD and actually so does my child with ARFID. This child will swim and run and climb all day long. Literally all day. It doesn’t change the fact that they have a deep seated fear, essentially a phobia, for many foods that is rooted in primal feelings of disgust. You simply can’t motivate that out of a child. I remember one book I read equating it to being offered $1000 to eat a bowl of vomit. You just can’t do it. It takes SO much time and tiny tiny baby steps over and over to make progress. Eventually many kids will make progress but it’s the hardest thing I’ve dealt with in my parenting journey so far. |
This is OP- I just bought this book, thanks! |
Sorry, but a diet without fruits and veggies is a recipe for disaster. I hope he improves and starts eating them, for his own sake. |
DP, but one of the very few foods that my kid eats is pork chops.
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Skills on the Hill |
Skills on the Hill |
| We started addressing this late, around 9 years old. It helped that my kid was motivated to learn how to eat more things so they could go out with their friends and share a meal. We did a feeding clinic/therapy for 2 years. Now, at almost 14, it's better. Still limited palate, but will eat a vegetable or two, many fruits, dairy, some meat/chicken/pork, and can even tolerate new versions of foods occasionally. It's a work in progress! |