Since becoming a mom I binge eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Drink lemon water and get outside to exercise.

Hard to do with a screaming toddler. But sounds good in theory.

[Anonymous]

I’ll be honest there are consequences

[Anonymous]

During COVID, like many, I started drinking too much—though I’ve always been more of a “wine mom” than not which probably didn’t help. Come from a family where a few drinks after work is the norm, so was always just a part of my routine after I got older.

I honestly didn’t really admit to myself how much I was using it as a crutch until I got pregnant with our second a few months ago and stopped entirely. Had to force myself to remember, and discover, how to relax. It also made me realize how little care I was taking of myself. I did something similar to PP and made a list, which revolves around reading and putting away my stupid phone. I have books in every room of the house now to help me remember to read instead of doom scroll when I have a few minutes. It’s really helped!

I don’t know if that is helpful to you but regardless, know you’re not alone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:During COVID, like many, I started drinking too much—though I’ve always been more of a “wine mom” than not which probably didn’t help. Come from a family where a few drinks after work is the norm, so was always just a part of my routine after I got older.

I honestly didn’t really admit to myself how much I was using it as a crutch until I got pregnant with our second a few months ago and stopped entirely. Had to force myself to remember, and discover, how to relax. It also made me realize how little care I was taking of myself. I did something similar to PP and made a list, which revolves around reading and putting away my stupid phone. I have books in every room of the house now to help me remember to read instead of doom scroll when I have a few minutes. It’s really helped!

I don’t know if that is helpful to you but regardless, know you’re not alone.

Thanks for sharing your experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Drink lemon water and get outside to exercise.

Hard to do with a screaming toddler. But sounds good in theory.

If you have a partner you can exercise. Period. Most DCUM moms are in a relationship

[Anonymous]

I had to start taking time for myself. Leave the husband with the kids and go to a class just for me. Now I do it three days a week. Just get out of the house. Your partner can manage.

[Anonymous]

Binge eating is normally a coping mechanism for deeper problems, as you seem to have already identified. As a former binge eater (mine was clinically diagnosed as an eating disorder), I want to strongly, strongly recommend therapy. Binge eating can be really terrible - it can deplete your sense of self worth, become another very large stressor, be unhealthy on many levels, become very consuming, and feel incredibly lonely. Breaking the cycle of binge eating is so helpful, but it is exceptionally hard to do on your own and just white knuckling through it isn't very effective. If you deal with the underlying issues (whatever they are) or just find healthier ways to cope, you will not need an "emergency therapy phone line" or for a friend to share the lows of motherhood. When I stopped binge eating, the overall quality of my life and emotional well-being increased drastically. It took me about a year of therapy 1-2 times weekly to really break my cycle. Hugs to you OP!

[Anonymous]

Another binge eater here. It becomes an impossible cycle to break.

I try to exercise alot to balance it out, but at this point have given up on fixing it.

Honestly, it makes you feel disgusting all the time and hate yourself. Get help now before you become me.

I am moderately fit and average weight. If you saw me on the street you would have no idea.

It is very hard to get anyone to take it seriously as an issue, especially if you look “normal”

So sorry. I don’t know what to tell you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Another binge eater here. It becomes an impossible cycle to break.

I try to exercise alot to balance it out, but at this point have given up on fixing it.

Honestly, it makes you feel disgusting all the time and hate yourself. Get help now before you become me.

I am moderately fit and average weight. If you saw me on the street you would have no idea.

It is very hard to get anyone to take it seriously as an issue, especially if you look “normal”

So sorry. I don’t know what to tell you.

PP, I'm the 9:15 poster and I totally feel your post. I also was fit, seemingly healthy, and thin through all of my binge eating, which went on to some degree for years. I exercised a lot, which I do think balanced out the binge eating and helped control my stress, but it was also something I'd use to try to counterbalance the binge eating in an unhealthy way (e.g., that was a terrible binge, I need to elliptical for an hour today). It's just exhausting and such a terrible cycle. I'm so sorry you're going through it. I just wanted to say that it can get better! It felt impossible for a very long time. I couldn't even fathom keeping things like bread, cereal, or crackers in the house, let alone treats or cookies. Today I have a totally normal/healthy relationship with food. I went to a therapist who specialized in eating disorders and it was so helpful. I agree most people don't take binge eating seriously because the term is thrown around fairly liberally and overeating on occasion is a normal behavior, but if your'e binging to the point that it is frequently impacting your mental/emotional well-being, there are probably some deeper issues that could be improved with some work.

[Anonymous]

Another binge eater here. I’ve gained 50 lbs in the last year. I think it’s just not being able to deal with life on life’s terms. Food is an easily accessible vice with instant relief.

I know I eat more when I’m very stressed and feel like I’m always on. I’m changing jobs at the end of the year to get some more time back for myself.

I binge more when I feel trapped, lost, depressed. It’s like I give up on trying to beat it. DH had an affair and it made me question everything about myself. I just feel ugly. I know the eating is a symptom of the underlying self esteem problem.

My advice is to try to change on small thing at a time. One thing I did was no eating after 8. I just made myself go to bed or take a shower. It is a line in the sand I can follow. Hugs to you and good luck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you start to get overwhelmed, acknowledge the feelings, then redirect your behavior to something else, like laundry or read a book or leave the house for a walk. I used binging to numb my emotions but finally figured out how to feel my emotions. It's hard if that has been your coping mechanism. Talk therapy doesn't always work, I have tried it. I just had to grow out of the behavior. Good luck! You are not alone.

When you're overwhelmed... redirect to something like laundry??? This is literally WHY I drink. Because as a mom, my "down time" is considered things like "Take time to shower" or "do laundry." Good Lord, it's 2023, can we do better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Drink lemon water and get outside to exercise.

Hard to do with a screaming toddler. But sounds good in theory.

If you have a partner you can exercise. Period. Most DCUM moms are in a relationship

Except sometimes you can't, because even when your partner and you "share time," you are making dinner or getting groceries while they play with the toddler or help the child with homework. It was very easy for me to say this before I had a second child, and now, with two, that really doesn't hold true. Exercise is literally impossible right now unless I do it at 4:30 am or after 11 pm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you start to get overwhelmed, acknowledge the feelings, then redirect your behavior to something else, like laundry or read a book or leave the house for a walk. I used binging to numb my emotions but finally figured out how to feel my emotions. It's hard if that has been your coping mechanism. Talk therapy doesn't always work, I have tried it. I just had to grow out of the behavior. Good luck! You are not alone.

When you're overwhelmed... redirect to something like laundry??? This is literally WHY I drink. Because as a mom, my "down time" is considered things like "Take time to shower" or "do laundry." Good Lord, it's 2023, can we do better?

Lol! I just spit out my wine!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When you start to get overwhelmed, acknowledge the feelings, then redirect your behavior to something else, like laundry or read a book or leave the house for a walk. I used binging to numb my emotions but finally figured out how to feel my emotions. It's hard if that has been your coping mechanism. Talk therapy doesn't always work, I have tried it. I just had to grow out of the behavior. Good luck! You are not alone.

When you're overwhelmed... redirect to something like laundry??? This is literally WHY I drink. Because as a mom, my "down time" is considered things like "Take time to shower" or "do laundry." Good Lord, it's 2023, can we do better?

+1, agree that's not helpful. This is why everyone needs a list of healthy or at least neutral options for relieving stress and giving themselves a break. Listen to a podcast or audio book, take a walk, spend time with your pet(s), make some art, take a shower or bath, take a nap, do some yoga, play music (either to listen to or literally play music on an instrument), knit or crochet, etc. Something for yourself that is NOT about taking care of others or your home. But also that isn't addictive, numbing behavior like binge eating, compulsive shopping, drugs or alcohol.

Though I will admit that my go-to move in times of overwhelm is to do one or more of the things I just listed and then, when I feel more calm and less burnt out, to do a few easier items on my mile long to-do list (like, say, start or fold a load of laundry) because a key part of handling the overwhelm of parenting for me is to accomplish a few things so that I don't feel like what I need to get done is insurmountable. But I have to decompress and take care of myself first. The whole point of this thread is what do you do when you hit a wall, and no, the advice cannot be "laundry." Laundry is part of the wall.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Drink lemon water and get outside to exercise.

LOL