I can’t decide whether to stay in private or not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We opted to keep DS in an independent school K-12 although we had to make some financial (investment) sacrifices to do it.

He emerged with an amazing education, which directly fed him into a top college, where he's doing really, really well. In a couple of years he'll have multiple job offers around the $100,000 mark ... and then he can buy his own property and take his own vacations, if he wants.

We gave him the "present" of an education that was superior to that in the public schools in our affluent, high achieving zip code. We thought that was a better lifelong gift than a couple of safaris.

Our kids make that money and they went to public schools and state colleges. You’re drawing a connection between one and the other where there very likely isn’t one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We opted to keep DS in an independent school K-12 although we had to make some financial (investment) sacrifices to do it.

He emerged with an amazing education, which directly fed him into a top college, where he's doing really, really well. In a couple of years he'll have multiple job offers around the $100,000 mark ... and then he can buy his own property and take his own vacations, if he wants.

We gave him the "present" of an education that was superior to that in the public schools in our affluent, high achieving zip code. We thought that was a better lifelong gift than a couple of safaris.

You didn’t give him the gift of humility. It’s easy to buy your way toward certain things. Also, how do you know he will have “multiple job offers” several years from now?! Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who kids become as people largely depends on their experiences growing up. It depends on the type of family they have, but also on the teachers and friends. If I think my children will become more confident, able to stand up for themselves, comfortable around intelligent and educated people, feel valued as people, aim higher because of what they are exposed to, etc. then yes, it is worth it for me.

For us private school for 3 kids is a stretch, but we feel it’s totally worth it. We are at top private schools and that is all I know (and public). I don’t know if I would feel the same at other schools

I had to laugh at this post. As a public school family, my kids absolutely have all of those things. Come on. Comfortable around intelligent and educated people? My kids’ great great grandmothers are all college educated and everyone has advanced degrees. Two of my child’s public school teachers have PhDs this year. My kids are super confident and aim very high. MCPS, like any school or school system, certainly has flaws. But all the values PP listed can absolutely be emphasized for FREE at public.

We have been to both MCPS and Big 3…. Sorry, but you are wrong. The difference is huge in what the kids actually get (especially from the teachers and the smaller class size). But keep telling yourself whatever makes you feel better.

NP:
The OP's child isn't at a Big 3... your comment is irrelevant. No pk-8 in DMV is like a Big 3. (and the Cathedral schools only start in 4th, so no way to compare K there either!)
You are not comparing what the discussion is about: excellent MCPS elem vs k-8.

There are a very small handful of K-8s in DC and Va. that are actually better than what is currently on offer at MCPS. No one in the BCC / Ws residential neighborhoods want to believe this, and they'll tell you that the younger grades are just about coloring, or something. And my g0d did you SEE HOW ACCELERATED our math tracks can get????? Did I mention MATH???

There's more to those 9 years than how fast you can blow through Algebra a mile wide and an inch deep. The 2-3 K/8s that I know well do it better

This doesn’t need to be a war where you put down other schools. The W schools and BCC are great but not a fit for all students. There are also great privates, but not all are a fit for all students. There are also some privates that are not super impressive academically but have other great aspects that certain students/families prioritize. All of you should be so thankful you have so many good options to choose from when some people have no good options and no choices.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

This cringe thread just got worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who kids become as people largely depends on their experiences growing up. It depends on the type of family they have, but also on the teachers and friends. If I think my children will become more confident, able to stand up for themselves, comfortable around intelligent and educated people, feel valued as people, aim higher because of what they are exposed to, etc. then yes, it is worth it for me.

For us private school for 3 kids is a stretch, but we feel it’s totally worth it. We are at top private schools and that is all I know (and public). I don’t know if I would feel the same at other schools

I had to laugh at this post. As a public school family, my kids absolutely have all of those things. Come on. Comfortable around intelligent and educated people? My kids’ great great grandmothers are all college educated and everyone has advanced degrees. Two of my child’s public school teachers have PhDs this year. My kids are super confident and aim very high. MCPS, like any school or school system, certainly has flaws. But all the values PP listed can absolutely be emphasized for FREE at public.

I’m not sure what school the public school poster has their kids attend, but we moved our DC from public to private this year and the difference is night and day. We are also at a school people here call a big 3, so not sure if that makes a difference. We don’t have experience with any others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just started K at a pK-8. We can afford the $40k price tag (x 2 when her little sister joins in two years) and it doesn’t change our current standard of living, but if we let that money pile up in a brokerage account, we would have SO much more money to give them in the future, or we could buy a huge vacation home for grandchildren to visit, etc. She’s had a pretty nice experience at her school and making progress in reading and math, but still finding her way socially since the other kids have known each other for a year already. Anybody else in the same boat? We are zoned for excellent publics, but after all they are publics with large class size and MCPS curriculum.

The type of wealth you’re describing is inconsistent with a mere $45,000ish a year tuition interfering with… it sounds like you really can’t afford private school as much as you think. And that’s OK.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

+1. Respectfully, omg you are not Kennedy-esque OK?.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

+1. Respectfully, omg you are not Kennedy-esque OK?.

OP is just saying it would be nice to have a family vacation property. She/he didn't say it would turn them into the Kennedys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

+1. Respectfully, omg you are not Kennedy-esque OK?.

OP is just saying it would be nice to have a family vacation property. She/he didn't say it would turn them into the Kennedys

Thank you! Not comparing myself to the Kennedys. Was just thinking, wouldn’t it be nice to have a 5-bedroom vacation home on the water where I can stay all summer after I retire, and my DDs and their future families can come enjoy themselves whenever they please. Or alternatively, to leave them big enough trust funds that they can be financially independent or nearly so living off the interest. I imagine many private school parents who are well off but for whom the tuition is not a blip have similar thoughts…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

+1. Respectfully, omg you are not Kennedy-esque OK?.

OP is just saying it would be nice to have a family vacation property. She/he didn't say it would turn them into the Kennedys

Thank you! Not comparing myself to the Kennedys. Was just thinking, wouldn’t it be nice to have a 5-bedroom vacation home on the water where I can stay all summer after I retire, and my DDs and their future families can come enjoy themselves whenever they please. Or alternatively, to leave them big enough trust funds that they can be financially independent or nearly so living off the interest. I imagine many private school parents who are well off but for whom the tuition is not a blip have similar thoughts…

Ummm you aren’t buying a waterfront New England compound or leaving your kids “I don’t have to work” money with what you’d save on 2 kids’ private school tuition for 13 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thanks everyone for your thoughts. We will stick it out for another year and re-evaluate.

DD is on the shyer and quieter side, bright but not a genius. We chose this private school for the small class sizes, excellent (though not accelerated) curriculum, and opportunities for leadership and public speaking.

Due to unforeseen circumstances, DH is making $200k more per year than we were expecting him to. And we banked that over the last two years. So we thought, why not give the kids a private education since we hear neighbors and family/friends complain about MCPS frequently. It is not hurting our lifestyle or savings. We can still afford to pay undergrad and grad school and start them with maybe a million each. But I was reading a book about the Kennedys and thinking, hey wouldn’t it be nice to put all that money in a compound instead!

Oh, dear lord.

+1. Respectfully, omg you are not Kennedy-esque OK?.

OP is just saying it would be nice to have a family vacation property. She/he didn't say it would turn them into the Kennedys

Thank you! Not comparing myself to the Kennedys. Was just thinking, wouldn’t it be nice to have a 5-bedroom vacation home on the water where I can stay all summer after I retire, and my DDs and their future families can come enjoy themselves whenever they please. Or alternatively, to leave them big enough trust funds that they can be financially independent or nearly so living off the interest. I imagine many private school parents who are well off but for whom the tuition is not a blip have similar thoughts…

Ummm you aren’t buying a waterfront New England compound or leaving your kids “I don’t have to work” money with what you’d save on 2 kids’ private school tuition for 13 years.

Ummm yes you can absolutely do the things *I* stated in my post by investing tuition money and letting it compound. Stop fixating on the Kennedys

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We opted to keep DS in an independent school K-12 although we had to make some financial (investment) sacrifices to do it.

He emerged with an amazing education, which directly fed him into a top college, where he's doing really, really well. In a couple of years he'll have multiple job offers around the $100,000 mark ... and then he can buy his own property and take his own vacations, if he wants.

We gave him the "present" of an education that was superior to that in the public schools in our affluent, high achieving zip code. We thought that was a better lifelong gift than a couple of safaris.

Please tell me this a joke post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who kids become as people largely depends on their experiences growing up. It depends on the type of family they have, but also on the teachers and friends. If I think my children will become more confident, able to stand up for themselves, comfortable around intelligent and educated people, feel valued as people, aim higher because of what they are exposed to, etc. then yes, it is worth it for me.

For us private school for 3 kids is a stretch, but we feel it’s totally worth it. We are at top private schools and that is all I know (and public). I don’t know if I would feel the same at other schools

+1

This is a reasonable perspective.