Rant about Deal and their religious field trip

[Anonymous]

I went to ncs, a pretty feminist school, and when the Dalai Lama came to visit and give a speech at the cathedral an we were invited to go, the school told us the respectful thing to do was to wear a skirt. So we wore skirts. Big deal.

I will say, annoyingly, the sta boys were given better seats and had a rare free dress day and were dressed like slobs while we were all dressed up sitting far away. Pissed us off.

[Anonymous]

I’m a pretty devout Christian but I once visited the Islamic Cultural Center and had to hear a headscarf. The world did not implode and I am no less of a Christian. I did learn a heck of a lot about Islam though, and for that I’m still grateful almost ten years later.

If they said “hey we’re studying religion but only visiting a church and a synagogue” you’d be ranting about the lack of inclusion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll tell you this much, OP: all this does is teach your kid to hate. Not good.

OP here. Honest question. Why does it teach my kids to hate?

Your unwillingness even to tolerate a dress code so that your kid can learn about a mosque strictly as an academic subject sends a message of intolerance, inflexibility, and hate.

[Anonymous]

honestly I find your view tiresome and obstinate for no reason. It is not an imposition to respect the rules of the place to visit.

My 11th grader still talks about that field trip. I've never been to a mosque but I find it interesting to learn about other cultures and broaden my mind. You have an extremely narrow viewpoint and I wish you'd reconsider. Showing respect for another culture is a modern way of thinking. I suppsoe you'd never have a Japanese friend because you would'nt take off your shoes to visit?>. Or supposing you had a devout friend, you would'nt attend a religious service that was, say, a funeral of a loved one of theirs because having to show a baseline of respect is offensive to you?

I mean come on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would let my kid go, but use this as a jumping off point to discuss patriarchical institutions and the harm that things like this does. In a wide view - in some Christian churches, shoulders must be covered. And in some Christian churches, women can’t serve in church leadership. And these things aren’t some crazy coincidence, they’re related and pervasive across cultures including ours.

No. You let the teacher do the teaching rather than use the opportunity to bash the particular religion in question.

[Anonymous]

i say let her go. there are countries in the world where women wear headscarves and it gives your daughter an opportunity to learn about a different culture. you can talk about women’s rights at home. the knee jerk impulse to insulate and shield kids from exposure to things that are different or that you might not fully agree with isnt usually the best path. your child might get something long-term positive out of the trip.

[Anonymous]

If your daughter was balking then absolutely don’t sign. If she wants to go yiu really need to stand down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send your kid uncovered and put deal in the position that you’re dealing with. They can either exclude an uncovered girl (and not uncovered boys) and face a gender discrimination complaint or they can let her go uncovered and deal with the mosque

Do NOT do this. Their next step will be to cancel the field trip altogether rather than cope with PITA parents. Then all of the kids lose out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I went to ncs, a pretty feminist school, and when the Dalai Lama came to visit and give a speech at the cathedral an we were invited to go, the school told us the respectful thing to do was to wear a skirt. So we wore skirts. Big deal.

I will say, annoyingly, the sta boys were given better seats and had a rare free dress day and were dressed like slobs while we were all dressed up sitting far away. Pissed us off.

And you still love telling this story from your glory days, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Visiting other religious institutions teaches tolerance. Including atheists being tolerant of other people having religious beliefs.

The Unitarian Church I went to growing up in North Carolina was regularly vandalized. Even in college I met a woman with a master's degree in Chemistry from my hometown who asked what church I went to growing up. When I told her, her mouth hung open and she asked if I really went to the "devil church." That's what people who never learn about other religions sometimes act like. On a related note, I didn't know a single person growing up in NC who didn't go to church...my family was nonreligious/agnostic so rather than not going to church we went to the nonreligious church.

They can “learn about other religions” in school without taking public school children to churches, temples, mosques, etc during school time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll tell you this much, OP: all this does is teach your kid to hate. Not good.

OP here. Honest question. Why does it teach my kids to hate?

Your unwillingness even to tolerate a dress code so that your kid can learn about a mosque strictly as an academic subject sends a message of intolerance, inflexibility, and hate.

Her kid can learn about the academic subject in class. I hope you stretched before that massive reach you just made.

[Anonymous]

When you go to someone’s home, you respect their customs such as shoe wearing or not. When you enter a public building you respect cultural norms such as wearing a shirt. Why make such a big deal about respecting the customs of a mosque?

It’s not your culture. You aren’t some enlightened feminist because you refuse to let your daughter show respect to another culture and cover her hair for an hour. Do you actually know any Muslim women who cover their hair and how they feel about it? To presume it’s bad, backwards, anti-feminist, etc. is just centering yourself and your culture.

I think you are missing the whole point of the class and the field trips.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Send your kid uncovered and put deal in the position that you’re dealing with. They can either exclude an uncovered girl (and not uncovered boys) and face a gender discrimination complaint or they can let her go uncovered and deal with the mosque

Do NOT do this. Their next step will be to cancel the field trip altogether rather than cope with PITA parents. Then all of the kids lose out.

Good. It doesn’t belong as part of a public school curriculum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are in 6th grade at Deal. They are studying religion in their geography class and, as part of the class, the school is organizing a field trip to a mosque, a church, and a synagogue. We are atheist but we understand that learning about religions is part of understanding the world. However, they are asking girls to cover their head/hair when entering the mosque; which I don't like. I mean, I 100% understand that the mosque requires that of women and I respect their requirement. It's their right. As is my right to never enter a mosque (and why I also try to avoid synagogues and churches as much as possible). But now the school is forcing me to tell my kid that I am not signing the consent form for them to go on the field trip. And I have to deal with my kids telling me that they will feel excluded. I guess it is a small price to pay for living in a religious society. I was naive in thinking that a public school wouldn't do this to families...I'm pissed off...End of rant.

Contact ACLU.

That hair requirement is clearly discriminatory.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll tell you this much, OP: all this does is teach your kid to hate. Not good.

OP here. Honest question. Why does it teach my kids to hate?

Your unwillingness even to tolerate a dress code so that your kid can learn about a mosque strictly as an academic subject sends a message of intolerance, inflexibility, and hate.

Her kid can learn about the academic subject in class. I hope you stretched before that massive reach you just made.

Not a massive reach. She’s basically saying she refuses to let her kid enter a mosque. It’s hate, pure and simple.